The Shadow of Israphel
by Zelda48
Summary: Xephos and Honeydew two legendary heroes return home to find their cave blown to the bits and the very safety of their friends in peril. An ancient evil is rising once more threatening everything they know. Thankfully the heroes have a little help this ti
1. Crash and Burn

**SoI Chapter 1: Crash and Burn**

 **A/N: How's it going guys? This is a reposted version of my REALLY old fanfic of the Shadow of Israphel.**

 **Enjoy and please tell me what you think!**

Prologue: The Last Messenger

The walls stood imperiously, overlooking the massive desert and expanse of sand and cactus that burdened it. They had been erected to protect against the desert, to protect the snowy and forested lands beyond from the dryness and death that the walls contained. The desert was massive with rolling dunes; huge cacti twice the height of a normal man and full of what some said were monsters. After all, that was the best explanation that anyone could offer for the odd noises, clanks and moans that came out of that place as all rational explanations had long been discredited. Expeditions to unearth the secrets of these noises had too failed as many never came back from trips to the desert, and reason and rationality were abandoned for what many saw as an evil buried in the sands. That was why the walls were built, to protect the populace from what laid buried in the desert. Some said it was more than monsters that lay in the dunes, that an evil spirit that had lain low for an age had been the cause of the infestation of the sands and the odd disappearances at night. That spirit some said was an entity called Israphel, a thing no one knew what it looked like but had come back for a twisted revenge on those who had admonished him in another age. Some even said that the sands themselves were cursed and contained some horrible taint, which would affect anyone who came into contact with it for very long.

At first to combat the sands towers had been built and soldiers, engineers and mages had been sent into the dunes and the outlying towns in a hope to combat the growth and find out the cause. It was to no avail as many years passed and the sands only grew, the rising tide of sand swallowed up town after town and even entire biomes in its wake. The rumors of an evil entity grew more prevalent. At one point the sands threatened the existence of all with disappearances mounting and the desert engulfing more and more of the landscape. And so the walls were built and the sands were contained but the evil never entirely ceased and after the failed battle it was again threatening the world. It was now more apparent than ever that the walls of the last standing outpost, Verigan's Hold would eventually crumble to the power of the desert. A mission to the last tower would have to be undertaken by the only man who could venture into the desert and come back alive.

The desert was silent in the evening gloom while the nearby tower overlooked it. The tower was deserted and crumbling with its stones broken and cracked in many places. The topmost part of the tower was completely open to the wind and air and sandstone clumps had formed in its cracks from the fierce sandstorms that frequently coated the desert. Suggestive to its ancient appearance the tower had a history, it was as empty as the desert but once it had been full of life on the inside, guards once patrolled the top on lookout and the perimeter outlying the tower where walls had once stood. That time seemed like an age ago to the man at its demolished entrance as he walked towards the tower's inviting gloom. Since then much had changed in the tower, first the sands, as the place had not always been a desert but had once been a swampy forest. Its fate had been horrible; sand now coated the trees frozen in time while the walls to the north were increasingly burdened with the rising tide of sand. Why the sand continued rising had been a source of unknown and great fear of those who lived near Verigan's Hold let alone the tower but attempts to quell its rise had been futile, the walls were all that stood in its way. The tower was a testament to the crushing power of the sands; it was called Lastwatch Hold, once the proud tower to the south-west of Verigan's Hold, which was thankfully still around but just. That was why the man was here, as a man on a mission to Lastwatch Hold for he would soon be dead and the way must be passed on, somehow. The way was the only one, which could be taken to quell the rise of the sands and the evil that was suspected to behind it all. As the man trekked to the sandblasted entrance a sudden blast of wind caught him by surprise, nearly knocking him over. He paused, steadied himself and continued inside.

The man paused at the entrance then ruffled through his knapsack pulling out a single torch striking it quickly, throwing a dull orange light across the gloom. Mercifully there were no mobs but the man was well prepared for it with an iron blade at his side while being fully obscured in iron armor. He glanced around the gloom then struck another torch placing it higher than the other at the east end of the room. The room now reflected nothing but decay, a few dusty and windblown tables and old tapestries long since forgotten. However, this was not the room the man seeked to enter as he crossed the room towards a stairwell at its end leading up the second level of the tower. Lastwatch Hold had four levels with each one serving a different purpose. The tower itself was the only part of Lastwatch that had not yet been consumed by the desert.

The second level yielded as few results as the first and was just as empty except for a few chests, crafting tables and furnaces, the room had once been an armory as well as a smithy for there was an ancient rack nearby which held a few broken swords. The man paused briefly to light the room with a single torch and then moved on. The third level was the darkest and most foreboding of all the rooms. At one time the room functioned as the barracks for the troops who were funneled in and out of Lastwatch. The barracks were completely dark due to the lack of any windows let alone a hole in the tower walls. Carefully, fully aware of possible monsters the man slowly drew his sword and with his free hand he struck a torch and posted it at the stairwell entrance. He paused for a moment as the orange light flashed across the gloom to reveal a green shape moving quickly towards its visitor a hissing sound emitted from it. The man yelled and flung himself down the staircase just before the explosion ruptured the walls and the floor, sparing the man but raining dust and bits of blocky rubble lightly on his armor. The green thing was a creeper, a hostile monster that had rarely been seen before the sands. However since then it had spread as far as Mistral and beyond infecting the lands and was not so easily stopped by walls and doors. The man had been expecting it.

"That's closer than I like it…" the man panted drawing himself back up raising his sword as he entered the third level of the tower, he stopped at the landing but there was nothing but quiet, the room was empty. Stumbling, the man fumbled in his pack for another torch, pulled one out, lit it and placed it on the far end of the room. The man glanced around, there were a few holes in the floor but the creeper's blast had left remarkably little damage. The man smiled what good luck to be so far up in a dark, abandoned tower and to have encountered only one creeper! He did not lower his sword as he climbed the intact staircase to the fourth and final floor. There the man would meet his purpose and do what he must do as Verigan had told him long ago. As the man reached the fourth floor he struck his final torch packing slowly towards the center of the room. Carefully he planted the torch while holding his sword at the ready, as even in the top of the tower there could be monsters waiting for him. Once the torch was lit the man to see where he was. The room was that of the Templar Lords of Lastwatch Hold and was covered in ancient tapestries, a bed rested in the left corner its royal red sheets still intact, and chests lined the walls.

The man paused; the chests had long since been emptied of their possessions before Lastwatch had fallen to the sands. Regardless the man's mission was to leave a message, for whoever may go so far to find it that would lead them to a way to save the world from the sands. The man coughed, reached deep into his knapsack and pulled out an ancient tattered piece of parchment taking great paints to remove it without tearing anything as he did so. The man reached up and removed his helm with a gloved hand for he could go about his task far easier without it blocking his view. Verigan had given the parchment to him before the last battle in the instance that he should die, his last instructions were still embedded in the man's mind.

 _Whatever you must do Karpath; take this parchment it is a map to the terrible evil that lies in the sands. I fear that if left alone, what lies there may fulfill the purpose it was built for... Be quick, the walls cannot hold forever, but know those here do not expect your return._

 _I know Verigan._

 _Very well, take this parchment and go to Lastwatch Hold. Leave it up in the fourth level of the tower in the chest nearest the bed with the crest of the Lastwatch Templars._

 _Who shall find it?_

 _Your son if he should make it so far…you know the why. Be careful Kartpath, if the map should find its way into the wrong hands all is lost. Remember, this map is the last and most essential clue to unlocking the secrets of the sands. I entrust it to you Karpath and keep it well, keep it safe until you reach Lastwatch…Adaephon shall watch over the Hold in your stead…._

The memory faded into nothingness as Karpath stood in the light and unfurled the map. It was a painted hand, the final clue to destroying the sands. With a swift motion, Karpath opened the chest nearest the bed and with hardly a flicker laid the map gently down into the abyss of the chest and closed it clicking the latch.

"Good luck…my son." Karpath murmured sheathing his sword starting down the levels of Lastwatch Hold as he put out the torches one by one.

Verigan was right, he would not return, but perhaps his son or someone would – someday.

…

Chapter 1: Crash and Burn

Xephos stood to the far end of the edge of the airship and surveyed the land below. A wave of relief passed through him as he gazed down at the familiar icy beach with its tall snowy trees to the far interior. The trip from the cursed survival island had lasted three days and they were home at last. Home!

Xephos was a tall dark haired man in a handsome red long sleeved shirt and stylish pants; he also sported a pointed dark beard, which was also handsome. Over his back was slung a diamond blade in a carefully guarded scabbard. Xephos was a spaceman, from a planet whose name no one could pronounce, but at heart he was one of the earth for he had spent nearly his entire life there. At first, he had lived off the land and in various humble abodes, but twelve years ago he had befriended a dwarf by the name of Honeydew and ever since the two had lived together in a cave by the sea. For the duration of the trip he had stayed with the company of a Skylord, an old man and Honeydew on a magnificent airship.

The airship had rescued Xephos and his companion from their last adventure, an ill-fated turn on the Survival Island, a desolate little strip of sand with exactly one tree. The cause of the misadventure was a boating accident as Honeydew- being a dwarf was not the best sailor and Xephos was even worse and thus they ended up far from home on the world's smallest island. Now after a two week long stay on the airship they were home at last, at the icy beach where the two companions had made their home in a large cave near the sea. Their rescuers, Skylord Lysander and Old Peculier had taken them from the Survival Island aboard the airship, which was called the _Celeno_.

Elated by the end of the long trip and their return home, Xephos turned around with a new confidence and observed the man at the control panel. The man was Lysander the Skylord, a noted astrologer and explorer of the far lands. Lysander was a big, burly bearded man with sleek black hair and a neatly trimmed beard; he wore goggles just over his eyes that signified his higher stance as a Skylord.

"Lysander on behalf of Simon and myself, I thank you for getting us here." Xephos said. Lysander shrugged noncommittally at this,

"Don't think of it. Such things merely constitute my duty as a Skylord." Then as if he had never heard Xephos he turned back to twisting and raising the control dials cursing silently.

"Um – right…"

"Glad to be back hero?" Lysander asked looking up briefly from his difficult work at the control panel. Xephos grinned,

"It's great to be back Lysander. I'm glad you found us way out there on the island, but I can't quite get over how you found us all the way out there." He said. Indeed, it was indeed a question Xephos had asked Lysander many times before, as there were no signs of land even a thousand blocks away from the little island they had been stranded on.

"My navigational technical techniques hero." Lysander said. _Navigational Technical Techniques_ only Lysander knew what it meant but he had claimed long since that all Skylords had them as Skylords were born not made.

"How did you really find us?" Xephos asked with a small smile.

"I already told you hero, although I _suppose_ luck was something of a factor in our meeting..."

"Oh! Right… That reminds me, how long will we stay?"

Lysander turned his back to him," Stay where?"

"At the…um cave you know." Xephos added. Lysander did not respond for several moments,

"No, I'm afraid we cannot stay long hero. The ship is running low on coal and Skyhold is still well over two hundred kilometers from here. Therefore… it is in the best interests of the quest and the _Celeno_ that we land here today and then sail to Skyhold tomorrow!"

"Oh, I was just hoping to stay for a little while. It's kind of a sentimental thing-" Xephos mumbled.

"Ah! Yes, yes understandable. However, you are coming with us to complete the quest of course? Surely the _Celeno_ isn't that uncomfortable for traveling?"

"No! I mean yes, I'm coming. And yeah the ship- it really is very comfortable!" Xephos protested, thinking back for a moment at the remarkably comfortable sleep he had been getting recently.

"Glad to hear it. I had the cabins newly furnished a while back actually. The previous owner of the _Celeno_ didn't take care of the beds one bit! I couldn't believe the sagging…"

Xephos laughed, "I wouldn't worry, you've done a better job than that. Loads better."

"I should hope so hero." Lysander said stiffly as he returned to his duties.

"All I meant was that we could stay an extra day. Me and Simon – we're a bit tired to be honest and we haven't been home in ages."

"I apologize hero, I misinterpreted your intentions." Lysander said brusquely "Forgive me, of course we can stay an extra day if you need the rest. An extra day would be better now that I think of it for our trip… it would give me the time to properly fix this ship for one thing."

Xephos smiled gratefully "Thanks Lysander."

"It is the least I can do you for you hero. However I hate to cut our chat short but we are about to land and it is a delicate business so I must give the controls my full attention, otherwise we could land in pieces!"

"Oh... right, you do that." Lysander gave a nod and returned back to the control panel and began twisting the dials and punching buttons on the dais.

Xephos gave a sigh, and once again leaned against the rail thinking about the trip once again and all they had been through. Their adventure had all started when strange shapes and signs had appeared around their home, the cave, which Honeydew was particularly fond of. Then one midsummer day he and Honeydew had spotted the bridge to the fledgling town of Terrorvale not a few kilometers from the cave! Memories flooded back, those of the few inhabitants of Terrorvale and its initial pleasant outlook with Father John, Old Peculier and Daisy the blacksmith. Then the terror truly struck and Father John died, and after leaving things returned to normal for a short time until Daisy disappeared and the boating accident on the Survival Island delayed her possible rescue. _Now_ , Xephos thought _we are here, as a company, and we are home at last, what next?_ The question popped up in Xephos' head but the spaceman knew all too well what was next. They had to find Daisy, the blacksmith of Terrorvale as she was the love of old Peculier's life, and as they had heard her father Evan Duke had offered a reward for her return. As much as the spaceman wanted to pretend that they really would be going home, and staying put there Xephos knew it wouldn't be the case, _not after what happened in Terrorvale anyway… We land here today and sail for SkyHold tomorrow!_ Xephos reiterated the Skylord's comment in his mind for a moment. _Maybe after this stop there really is no coming back…maybe this is the last time we'll ever see the cave…_

Breaking out of his thoughts Xephos turned again on the railing to look down on the progress the airship had made to the cave. The old cave was stark against the landscape, barely visible but it could still be easily distinguished from the pine trees surrounding it. Xephos felt a twinge of excitement just to look upon their old home again. The return back felt almost felt as if they weren't really leaving tomorrow but were arriving for a long winter's stay.

Suddenly a loud crash ricocheted from below followed by a loud curse in Dwarfish mingled with a note of pain. Xephos stumbled with surprise and Lysander even looked up from his work long enough to see Honeydew appear from the lower deck clutching his head in pain.

"Silly bed almost cut my beard…" he muttered as he stumbled on the last step onto the deck. "Ooooh…"

"Hello Simon." Xephos greeted him cordially.

Honeydew was sometimes called Simon, his given name to those who were closer to him but he was best known by his liking of sweets and honeydews for which he was called.

Honeydew looked over at him – whilst covering his eyes to shield himself from the glare - "You're awake?"

"What time is it?"

"Eleven hero." Lysander informed him.

"Eleven!" Honeydew exclaimed "I could have sworn I didn't sleep _that_ long… are you sure about the time Lysander?"

"A Skylord is always on time dwarf."

Xephos smiled, classic Honeydew. "You're a bit out of it huh?"

"You could say that…" Honeydew groaned.

"So – how much ale did you have last night…?"

"Oh only a little." Honeydew replied still clutching his head. Xephos laughed, only a little ale was unheard of for a Dwarf, especially one like Honeydew. _He's probably cleaned out all of Bode's ale by now…_

"Oh really? How many pints did you have again? Was it seven or eight?"

"Honestly I can't bloody remember…" Honeydew groaned covering his ears from as another steam pipe blew. "Ooooh… gods that's loud…"

Honeydew was slightly taller than most dwarves and sported a large orange beard, which as he thought, most women found handsome, despite the fact that he still had yet to meet a fellow dwarf woman. Currently he was wearing a rather tight pair of pink pajamas – once belonging to the Skylord's grandmother under his short-coat and belt; it was a sight that was hard not to laugh at.

"What's he up too?" Honeydew asked, gesturing to Lysander.

"We're about to land." Xephos explained.

"Something wrong hero?" Lysander called from behind the control panel, it was difficult to tell but the Skylord was concealing a smile of amusement behind his beard. "Feeling unwell?"

"No- uh I was just curious what you were doing – looked like you were having a seizure or something…" Honeydew said with a wave. "And uh no, not exactly. Well, no I'm not in top notch shape at the moment… I was just telling Lewis. Hey what are you looking at?" The dwarf's pajamas had slipped and exposed Honeydew's hairy middle, which both Xephos and Lysander were staring at.

"Is it a loose fit for you?" Lysander asked, concealing a smile.

"Loose? Yeh I guess you could say that Lysander… right! Uh… I'd better go change then." Honeydew said awkwardly shuffling back down the stairwell to the bottom of the airship. "The light's too bright up here…too noisy really," Honeydew murmured as he disappeared below, upon which Xephos burst out laughing.

"Morning… " a morose voice called simultaneously. It was a voice full of wistfulness, the one of the fourth companion Peculier. Peculier appeared from behind the corner of the control dial, his lined, thin face worn behind his shaggy brown hair, which was now balding with age in the middle. He was dressed in pull-ups and a well-worn shirt. As for his name he was called old Peculier because as he had once told them, he was well over a hundred years old. Although by the look of it Peculier didn't look one bit his age. It was almost as if the man had an endless supply of anti-aging cream Honeydew had once pointed out.

"Peculier!" Lysander exclaimed "What are you doing up so early? It's almost noon, surely that's a bit early for last night."

Peculier raised his eyebrows in apprehension, and then lowered them. "True, true, I was just checking the mechanics back there. Did you know you've got a cracked steam pipe Lysander? The hissing woke me up." Lysander looked at him with interest before turning away.

"Thank you Peculier, I'll mend it after we land."

Peculier nodded, "That's fine, but I won't need a rest then." Xephos gave a small smile; he had slept well, thankfully having chosen the bunk the farthest from the engine room.

"Have we got any tea Lysander?" Xephos asked, "To celebrate since we're home and everything?"

"Tea? I wish hero, I wish… we ran out of it just yesterday I'm afraid. Perhaps we have something just as good…" Lysander muttered "Ah dwarf!" Lysander motioned to Honeydew who reappeared in his usual dwarfish getup "Do we have any more Jaffa cakes?"

Peculier raised his eyebrows again almost comically giving the appearance of an excited young boy.

He turned and looked at Honeydew. "Jaffa's… you have Jaffa cakes dwarf?"

Jaffa cakes were extremely delicious and were an excellent substitute for typical baked cakes as they were more easily made. Jaffa's were so delicious they were the only thing Honeydew liked more than a stout glass of ale. The dwarf had a personal Jaffa stash at the cave and a second for guests, although he ate most of those too. For Honeydew Jaffa's and good, quality bacon had sustained him almost entirely during their travels. However if they or he were actually out of Jaffa cakes it was fortunate they were home once more.

"Uh …Yeah, well I hate to break it to you but we _might_ not have any more -" Honeydew burped causing Xephos to laugh. "of them… I mean… They were delicious!"

Oddly enough Peculier's face fell visibly at this news. His sudden sadness wasn't surprising however. Throughout the trip Peculier had been known to fall into sudden depressions. According to Lysander it was part of his condition that had existed since Daisy disappeared although it hadn't been as bad since the heroes had met him.

Honeydew sauntered over to the old man grabbing him around the shoulder making Peculier stumble.

"Something wrong old man? I mean if you're feeling bad about the Jaffa's I just didn't want them to go to waste that's all…you know all that good food and everything- it was kind of tempting and I couldn't help myself -"

"Yes… Are you feeling un-well again Peculier? A lie down might do you some good perhaps?" Lysander interjected looking up brusquely from the control dials.

"N-not really Lysander." The old man said. "It's just- I've been thinking about it, where we're going, how will we find Daisy…?"

"We'll find Daisy someday... uh very soon!" Honeydew grinned encouragingly giving Peculier another pat on the back flooring him.

"That's – good to know, but I didn't need that." Peculier blushed pushing himself off the floor, Xephos and Lysander roared with laughter as the old man brushed himself off.

"On a more relevant point…" Lysander said over the voice of Honeydew apologizing to Peculier, "At Skyhold there is many skilled navigators, like me, who can aid you in your search."

"Oh…right, but-" Peculier protested weakly.

"Oh really Peculier! All of us here feel your loss but can you expect us to change course in the middle of the trip?" Lysander asked exasperatedly. Peculier had been dropping hints the entire trip that he believed that going to Skyhold wouldn't help them find Daisy. Lysander finally had told Peculier two days earlier that they were going to Skyhold and that was final. Since then Peculier had ceased to argue with the Lysander over the matter.

"Aye…when we get there then…" Peculier sighed, clearly dissatisfied with the Skylord's answer. "Just well…you know how it is."

In an instant the slightly lighthearted mood had almost instantly vanished from the airship as the conversation ceased and Lysander returned to his duties. Xephos sighed and leaned against a stack of wood planks facing the railing while he gazed at the familiar land far below it. Suddenly he heard a clanking from behind; apparently Peculier had come to join him on the railing.

"Where will you go?" Xephos asked. Peculier sighed and looked down and started tracing the wood with his fingers.

"With Lysander I suppose. It's my quest isn't it? I can't go back to Terrorvale really…" he sighed. Terrorvale… there had rarely been a town more aptly named than that place. Xephos shivered at the memory of their disastrous visit to the place several months ago. The town had enough troubles with zombie attacks, infestations of enormous, man-eating spiders by itself. Then, after they had finally wiped out all the mobs Reverend John went mad and tried to kill them along with everyone else in the place after abducting Daisy.

"Honestly I don't blame you if you don't want to go back." Xephos said. Peculier nodded in agreement,

"Aye. You're right hero. I can't go back…because of her- I mean Daisy." Peculier drifted off gripping the railing tightly closing his eyes as if he was fighting off a bad dream.

"C'mon" Xephos said putting a hand on his shoulder, "You'll find her old man. I know you will."

"Aye hero… I'll go to the ends of the earth to find her." Peculier replied with a note of determination entering his voice "Will you-"

"We'll go with you. You know that." Xephos started "-until we find Daisy." Honeydew rumbled gently. Peculier smiled glumly, the kind of smile that conveyed a thousand emotions. Xephos turned and directed to the mainland.

"That's the cave, our home." He said to Peculier who glanced passively over the railing.

"Yeah that's the fabled Yogcave right there."

"I don't know about the fabled bit Simon."

"The Yog…sorry?" Peculier asked quizzically.

"The Yogcave! Oh come on everyone knows about the Yogcave…" Honeydew said. Peculier shrugged,

"You never called it that before hero. What does Yogcave mean?"

"Big cave in dwarfish." Honeydew explained.

"Ah… erm…" Peculier said, "That's a rather… interesting name."

"Wait it really means big cave?" Xephos asked " _That's_ what you named it?"

"Yeah." Honeydew said "What? I mean it _is_ like that -"

"Yeah, yeah I get the name and everything." Xephos said. "I thought it was something more sentimental that's all…"

"Sentimental? Lewis, it's a huge rock thing with a hole in it!" Honeydew laughed. Lewis was a nickname that Honeydew had given to Xephos because of his tendency to explore things and his unusual level of curiosity.

"Anyway we're home, we're home we're hooooome!" Honeydew danced happily "and hang on, are we getting a bit closer?"

"I'm not sure." Xephos said peering over the side. "Maybe we're finally landing."

"On a pyramid?" Honeydew asked worriedly.

"A Pyramid?"

"What is it heroes?"

Suddenly, a loud rumbling emitted from the ship steam spewing from every pipe, omitting the sound of Lysander cursing loudly.

"Whoa!" Peculier yelled.

"Oh gods, ohhh gods! What- What's happening?!" Honeydew yelped as the ship gave a dangerous lurch to the side and began a sharp plunge downwards.

"The ship's lost control! Grab on to something, we're going down!" Lysander bellowed over the crashing crescendo around them. Xephos grabbed on tightly to the railing as the airship leaned to the side and suddenly gave a forward lurch throwing the companions against the bulkhead of the ship.

Xephos looked over his shoulder just in time to see his friend slam into the railing next to him. The ship was in chaos, boxes were flying through the air and exploding their contents on the deck like miniature bombs and a loud screeching noise emitted from the pipes.

"LYSANDER IF WE DIE THIS IS YOUR FAULT!" Honeydew bellowed.

"Watch out!"

But no sooner had Xephos said this before the world turned black, then yellow and red, a distant explosion roared in the background. Xephos was thrown from the deck into a mound of white mesh that became yellow, then red and orange, fire. The fiery image terrified the spaceman more than anything else. For the first time in his life, Xephos felt like he was going to die and there was nothing he could do about it. The flames consumed him, covered his eyes, his smell, his world was of fire of the Netherland and in it was the face of Israphel glowing like a victorious demon.

With a surge of remaining strength Xephos did a somersault over the tangled mass of burning mesh and the heat stumbling into a thick gray mist. Smoke. It greeted him like a long awaited reprieve, or perhaps a heavy gin. The smoke was thick, intoxicating even. Into the deep Xephos sank as the heat evaporated from his body. Exhausted Xephos collapsed; the water had put him out. As the swirl of darkness enclosed him, Xephos thought he could see a strange square of deep purple growing steadily larger. Then the world turned black, and the sinister shape vanished into nothingness.

 _A square of purple stones?_ The thought had awakened Xephos, and immediately the pale, twisted face of Israphel resurfaced in his mind.

Xephos blinked and sat up, he was in a pool of water and foodstuffs and broken blocks were scattered all around him. _Gah!_ He thought as he looked down at his clothes in great distaste, _they're ruined!_ The fabric of his over-shirt was torn and the bottom edges had largely been robbed of their royal red colors. However, to Xephos' surprise he didn't feel hurt in any way. Carefully he felt his legs, his back, face and chest, but there was nothing wrong, he had survived unharmed.

Nevertheless, the demise of Xephos' clothing couldn't remotely compare with the chaos in front of him. Lysander's airship was utterly destroyed, as parts of it were still burning while feathers floated out of a broken crate nearby, and rigging and mesh lay in charred heaps around the destroyed deck. Brushing himself off, Xephos rushed to the other side of the ship finding Peculier and the Skylord in hardly a better state, Peculier had lost an eyebrow while the Skylord had received a complete fiery makeover. But on the plus side neither Lysander nor Peculier was bleeding or seriously hurt – that at least was somewhat relieving.

"If Jasper ever hears of this… IN NOTCHES' NAME HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?! Lysander roared. "Elder Naboth will NEVER forgive me for THIS! It was working PERFECTLY FINE THE WHOLE RUDDY TRIP!"

"Lysander?" Xephos asked. "Are you okay?"

Quietly Lysander turned to Xephos and called to him,

"Looking for the dwarf spaceman?"

"Yeah! Is he okay? Do you know where he is?" Xephos wondered what would Honeydew look like after the accident considering Lysander's and Peculier's almost comical appearance. Lysander motioned with a bucket towards the cave.

"Look over there." He growled.

Xephos whirled around and glanced towards the cave. Indeed, there was Honeydew was at the cave pickaxe in hand, and around him their home was in flames.

"Simon!" Xephos called, as he started running towards the dwarf his thoughts turned back to earlier. _The cave…oh no!_ Xephos thought breaking into a near sprint; the image of Israphel flooding his mind Xephos slowed his step and drew his sword. As he cleared the outer rubbish it was clear, the cave had been blasted to bits. He paused and surveyed the grim scene. There was a massive hole in the roof and floor of the cave; smoke was billowing out of the ruins and the charred remains of Honeydew's pig farm rested nearby. But what stood out from the rest of the destruction was a tall square of obsidian at the top of a stone staircase near the cave. _A portal!_

Honeydew rested next to the fiendish thing quivering with rage, he gripped his axe handle tightly in a fit of self-control. Half his beard was burnt off as was his hair giving him an almost perfectly circular bald spot in the back and the appearance of a charred log on the front.

"Simon! I- are you..?" Xephos paused trying his best not to laugh at the sight of the Dwarf. "Are you okay?" he finally asked. "No cuts, bruises or anything?"

"I'm alright- just a bit of a headache. But…they, Israphel…they did it those bloody-"Honeydew raged. Xephos gave a heavy sigh,

"Good gods! It looks like they TNT'ed the hell out of everything!"

"Yeah did you like Israphel's homecoming present?" Honeydew asked sarcastically "Welcome home- and by the way we blew up your house!'" he said in a good imitation of a creeper's hissing voice.

"I don't see him being too popular at parties." Xephos surmised. Honeydew chortled at this,

"Not to mention you could wear his face as a Halloween mask."

"Is there anything left?" Xephos asked "Did you find anything? And how long have you been at this?"

"I haven't been here long, just a few minutes… or maybe around an hour. I haven't really found anything. Most of the stuff's blown to bits… aside from this stupid Nether portal!" Honeydew said ramming the end of the pickaxe on the obsidian edge.

"Wait… they got the ingredients for your Jaffa factory too?" Xephos asked.

"Oh cripes! That reminds me!" Honeydew exclaimed, eyes widening "Oooh I hope they didn't get that… it took ages to make - wait here Lewis!"

With that Honeydew bounded off into the smoky ruins of the cave, pickaxe in hand.

"Wait- Simon!" Xephos called but it was too late – Honeydew had already disappeared. "Good luck then…"

Xephos sighed and glanced around the cave.

"But we've still got the Jaffa cakes haven't we?" Honeydew grunted tossing a sack on the muddy ruined floor. "Why not? Have a good snack after nearly dying!"

"Thanks for saving them Simon." Xephos said giving a rueful smile. Carefully, Xephos reached into the sack pulled out a Jaffa and began munching on it _mmm… there is nothing like a Jaffa after a near death experience_. Unlike Xephos or the other passengers Honeydew sustained few burns and just a scar near his knee. The dwarf stood and banged his axe on the floor in frustration.

"So much for staying eh?" Honeydew said gruffly. "Maybe if Lysander had fixed that bloody steam pipe-"

"We don't know why the crash happened mate." Xephos said. "If anyone will know it's Lysander, and besides there's no way he crashed on purpose."

Honeydew shrugged and dug into another Jaffa cake. "It's _terrible_ luck Lewis. _Terrible_."

"Yeah… d'you reckon Israphel put that portal here?" Xephos asked, after all a hell-gate certainly wasn't exactly the kind of décor _he_ would've put up. Honeydew just shook his head.

"Lewis you're a genius. A bloody sounds like the kind of thing an evil, scheming bastard like him would do doesn't it? But the portal doesn't go anywhere, it's sealed somehow." Honeydew trailed off as Lysander followed by a subdued Peculier rushed towards the destroyed cave.

"Well he must have blown up the cave too. He did it once before didn't he?" Xephos surmised.

"Hey Lysander, any ideas why we crash landed?" Honeydew called.

"What the devil is going on here?!" Lysander yelled, then he trailed off, as he had noticed the portal. "Is this foul thing your portal?" he glared pointing his sword at the portal looking from Honeydew to Xephos; they shook their heads as Lysander visibly relaxed but only slightly. He was still quivering with rage.

"That's well enough… this must be the work of Israphel."

"Way to point out the obvious Lysander." Xephos said flatly.

"Yes, well that would explain a lot of things!" Lysander huffed.

Peculier gestured wildly to the portal, "So Daisy is in that…thing… And why can't we go get her?"

"Because it's-" Honeydew started but Lysander cut across him.

"Even if we can enter the hell-gate it is dangerous! And I shouldn't have to remind you that even in that case it wouldn't matter Peculier. We don't know where in the Nether she could be! As much as I do feel for your loss Peculier we cannot go off on wild quests unprepared… and if you need evidence of this disastrous situation just look at my ship!"

"LOOK AT MY HOUSE!" Honeydew bellowed. "By the way - Lysander how did we crash?"

"I don't know!" Lysander exclaimed.

"Oh that's lovely." Honeydew said, crossing his arms "He crashes, we nearly die and he has no idea how it happened. No idea!"

"Yes… while I am sorry for the loss of your home…"

"Cave." Xephos interjected.

"Yes… your cave – while I apologize for the damage I haven't been able to thoroughly examine the situation! But no– this is not the time for bickering." Lysander exclaimed trying his best to keep his temper under control. "We must pack up our supplies and leave as soon as possible."

"But why? Daisy is IN THERE! And you want to leave?" Peculier cried. Honeydew rolled his eyes in exasperation.

"Lysander, old man…OI!"

"I knew I'd never see her again…" Peculier moaned before turning to Honeydew "what was that dwarf?"

"I was GOING to say that the stupid thing," Honeydew gestured to the portal "Is blocked. I tested it earlier."

"Blocked?! We shall see about that!" Peculier shouted as he strode up the staircase to the portal.

"Please Peculier! It is blocked! Such antics will only cost us more time…" Lysander pleaded. Peculier ignored him and began yelling into the portal's purple abyss,

"DAISY! ANSWER ME! DAISY!"

"Maybe it would help if you said her last name?" Xephos suggested. "So she knows which Daisy you're talking about?"

"DAISY DUKE!"

"Oh for Mordan's sake…" Honeydew grumbled as he grabbed a Jaffa cake and aimed it at Peculier.

Lysander gave him an odd look "Dwarf? What are you doing?"

"Showing him." Honeydew said simply.

"Showing him what? You're not doing what I think you are -" Lysander started but before he could finish his sentence the Jaffa cake soared through the air and hit Peculier on the back of the head.

"Aaaah!" Peculier screamed as he toppled forwards into the portal. There was a stunned silence as Peculier's form seemed to meld into the portal but a second later there was a loud groan and he was blasted from the portal and fell down the steps at the group's feet. Moments later the Jaffa shot out of the portal straight into Honeydew's hand.

"Told you it was sealed." Honeydew said. Lysander whirled around furiously,

"What were you thinking?! You could have killed him!"

"Oh yeah, you got a fair point there." Honeydew said as he bent over Peculier and hoisted him up with one arm "Alright old man? Sorry about that…"

"I-I'm okay." Peculier said shakily. Lysander glared crossly at him,

"There were better ways to test it than that!" he snapped. Honeydew rolled his eyes and took a bite out of the Jaffa.

"So? No one's hurt everything's fine, right?"

"Yes- no. No! Everything is not fine at all!" Lysander exclaimed.

"What do we do now?" Xephos asked.

"I don't know heroes… I don't know!"

"Want a Jaffa? We have extras you know." Honeydew said.

"No thank you dwarf… no I would not like a Jaffa…" Lysander sighed and started furiously polishing his goggles. Honeydew shrugged and took another bite out of his Jaffa.

"Your loss." For several moments no one said anything until Peculier broke the silence with a sigh of exasperation.

"So Daisy is in the Nether… And we can't save her…"

"But was Daisy taken into hell Peculier? Think! Maybe Daisy escaped." Lysander said without conviction. Everyone already knew what had happened to Daisy as there was no way she could have escaped. Xephos jumped off the short outcrop to join Lysander.

"Lysander's right, you've got to stay positive. Besides you know we'll help you find Daisy no matter where she is." Peculier looked down at the blasted floor and shook his head but everyone knew he understood, they would all follow him to whatever end to complete their quest.

"I know heroes. Thank you." he said calmly.

"Very well, if you have finished Peculier then it is now time for sensible measures to be taken…" Lysander said testily, "Honeydew! Dwarf! Can you destroy this foul thing?" the he queried, pointing his sword at the portal. "Although the portal is sealed it may not stay that way and the last thing the world needs is legions of pigmen and Notch forbid Israphel – streaming out of this hell-gate."

"'Course I can, I'm a mighty dwarf of Khaz Mordan!" Honeydew said importantly.

"It is of the greatest importance hero. As long as the portal is here the whole surrounding area is in danger!" Lysander exclaimed.

"Yeah I think that was a _little_ self- explanatory." Honeydew said.

"It pains me but Daisy will have to wait…" Peculier said sadly.

"Please, dwarf!" Lysander exclaimed, gesturing to the portal in impatience.

"Yeah I know! Er- right I shahl destrotyr the uh…operal- thing." And with that Honeydew stood up with a flourish and began chipping away at the purple sides of the portal with his diamond chipped pickaxe.

"Are you drunk?" Peculier asked bemusedly, watching the dwarf's slow process. _Honestly, anyone would be pretty off balance after that crash so probably not._ Xephos thought.

"No No- just finishing the Jaffa… and uh a little disoriented." He burped "There we go!" Honeydew smiled triumphantly at his handiwork. There was now a hole in the portal, and it was broken as was confirmed by the purple light of the cave abruptly going out.

"Should we trust him with the pick if he's drunk?" Lysander asked in a low voice, which was most unfortunately heard by Honeydew.

"I was finishing eating!" Honeydew said indignantly. "Besides, you crash landed. How can we trust _you_ with anything after you almost got all of us killed?"

"Oh really! Hero I meant you no ill will let alone a terrible crash!" Lysander exclaimed indignantly "If I had wished to kill you then I would have crashed out in the ocean, before we reached shore."

"Sounds like you've planned it out already." Honeydew snorted.

"Please be rational hero…" Lysander pleaded "You were talking irregularly and I was only concerned about your state of mind."

"Yeah well – you do that!" Honeydew growled as he sat and ran his hands through his puffy orange hair. "My state of mind? I couldn't be better! And I talk 'irregularly' huh? Snob!" he said once Lysander was out of earshot.

 _Welcome home,_ Xephos thought with heavy irony. The whole situation was very depressing, he had a game of billiards planned for the evening on their new pool table but instead it had been destroyed with everything else in a fiery inferno. He listened to Honeydew and Lysander bicker for a time before he turned and walked towards the ruins of the cave. _Yeah…_

Gradually silence engulfed the shoreline as the sun slowly sank into the hills. Smoke poured from the wreckage of the old ship, on which the Skylord gazed morosely, occasionally cursing himself for the crash. Xephos planted torches around the perimeter of the cave as dusk descended into early nighttime.

"Well heroes…" Lysander sighed "we must be off. I have been studying several maps and have found a shelter for us. It's a city – Mistral City and we can get rest, food and help there."

"Let's get some supplies hero. It's almost nightfall and it's a one - day trip to Mistral." He continued as he motioned to Xephos and headed for the ship where bags and crates of materials were scattered everywhere on the coastline.

Xephos rolled up his sleeves as he and the others rummaged through what was left of the _Celeno_. Many hours later, at nearly eight in the evening –according to Lysander's watch- the group was ready to go. It was high nighttime and the monsters would be spawning in the distant gloom of the forest. Next, he lit a torch and staked it to the lower hull of the airship as to better see what he was doing. Carefully, he bent down and filled his knapsack with remaining items and supplies around him that were untouched by the crash. Once this was done Xephos carefully examined the contents of his sack which included: several days' worth of apples and pork and his crafting bench as well as multiple wood and stone blocks. He was wearing a diamond embedded chest plate under one of Lysander's cloaks, which he found, oddly enough in a chest of sand. His own quiver of arrows was slung over his back, and over his shoulder was his restrung his bow. Xephos put a hand on the hilt of his sword _I'll need you eventually_ he thought grimly.

Suddenly there was a loud yell. Xephos turned around to see Lysander immersed in a very large pile of mostly – ruined clothes. "Oh… HELL! My BEST clothes! They're ruined! Utterly ruined beyond repair!"

Xephos made a mental note to pack extra clothes, including some underwear, which he was in dangerously low supply of, upon hearing Lysander's anguish over his clothing situation.

Once Xephos finished packing he leaned against the airship's broken hull and took a last look atthe old cave.

"Goodbye."

It had just occurred to him this could be the last time he'd ever see it. The cave was smoldering now, with fires in several places. Almost nothing remained of their old home save for part of the kitchen. Instead Israphel had destroyed the cave, with the now destroyed portal as a symbol of his conquest.

"There's no use dwelling on it I guess…" Xephos muttered as he walked away from his burning home. He trudged up the hillside following the torches that led east of the cave.

Shortly Xephos reached the top of the hill and made his way down the side. Everything was aflame on the other side as well. Several meters away Lysander and Honeydew waited for him with their weapons drawn and knapsacks filled to the brim. Off to the side, Peculier was staring off into the distance with a much smaller knapsack on his back and an old sword laced around his belt. Xephos had to admit; the one good thing about the fires was the great deal of natural lighting and heat that they provided.

"Greetings Lysander!" Xephos called.

Lysander raised his sword in greeting. "Hail Xephos! All ready to go?"

"I'm ready to go!" Xephos replied.

"Excellent! Right then, let us depart heroesfor the fires will soon be out and the road to Mistral is long and most likely quite dark."

"How long is the road?" Xephos queried.

"Twenty kilometers hero! Over a day's walk according to my calculations." Lysander finished glancing at Peculier.

Xephos hurried down the hillside sword in hand joining a nervous Honeydew and the two hurried forwards to catch up with Lysander and Peculier who were already moving towards the icy coastline. Lysander chuckled,

"There is nothing to worry about heroes – it's not such a bad journey if you need the exercise!"

"You mean it's not too long if you have infinite energy." Honeydew grumbled.

"Oh cripes I nearly forgot to ask… hey Lysander why'd we crash?" Xephos asked.

"Smoke from the cave apparently. It was clogging up the pipes!" Lysander informed him.

Honeydew paused and gestured with his axe to Peculier. "Umm, Lysander? What's wrong with him? He's got that look my cousin used to get when he lost all his privileges- kind of vacant really…"Lysander became suddenly reserved at the question,

"The night I believe, it brings back memories from what he tells me…from Terrorvale. It's part of his condition -" Lysander started but he was interrupted by a sudden choking followed by a loud, horrible shriek.

"Peculier?" Lysander whirled around just in time to see the old man collapse to the ground "PECULIER!" he to the facedown form of the old man, Peculier was barely breathing, while clutching at his chest. Lysander looked at him with great concern as he threw off his knapsack and pulled out a vial full of a dull pink liquid from his belt. Xephos planted a torch nearby for lighting. Peculier was pale, his eyes wide and his face gaunt; he was shaking and clutching at his chest.

Peculier started grabbing at his face and clawing at the ground. Lysander attempted to hold his hands in place but Peculier threw him off and screamed "Aaah…I-Isra-AAAAAAIIIEEEEE! Ah…no…no…NOOOOO!"

"Honeydew, Xephos, one of you – hold him!" Lysander bellowed.

"Got it!" Honeydew said as he launched himself atop Peculier and forced arms to the ground and held them there.

The three watched for several moments in horror as Peculier screamed several more times and writhed on the ground, his face wound in an expression of fright and extreme pain.

"C'mon, live old man live!" Xephos yelled.

"Xephos I need you to force his mouth open." Lysander said in a calm, commanding voice as Peculier let out another piercing wail.

"I don't -"

Lysander removed the lid of one of the pink vials "Do it!"

Without another word Xephos threw off his pack, got down next to Honeydew and grabbed Peculier's jaw and precariously held it open.

Lysander crouched down above Peculier's head and poured the pink liquid down the old man's throat, emptying the vial. "Close his mouth and sit him up so the liquid goes down him."

Honeydew obeyed him and gently forced Peculier upright. A moment passed, then two as the three sat in silence and apprehension watching as Peculier collapsed on the ground and let out a deep sigh. Honeydew stared at him and pressed an ear to his chest

"He isn't breathing…gods Lewis, he isn't breathing-!" he exclaimed.

However a moment later the old man slowly stirred as one coming back from the dead. Peculier's eyelid's flashed as he awoke. "Lysander?" he asked as he glanced nervously from Lysander to the two heroes.

"He's alive…" Xephos looked in wonderment at Lysander "You're alive!" he and Honeydew hugged Peculier for a brief moment lest they harmed him in his fragile condition.

"Praise Notch!" Honeydew said joyfully.

"Yes indeed!" Lysander concurred.

"And Hail Hydra!"

"Um… that's taking it a bit far isn't it?" Xephos laughed.

"No, not really." Honeydew smiled.

"What was that thing you used Lysander?" Xephos asked, turning to Lysander.

"A potion." Lysander said dismissively, "Nevertheless, let us rejoice once again for you are well Peculier!"

"Hooray!" Honeydew chimed in. Peculier gave a weak smile at this,

"T-thank you heroes…what happened to me though?"

"You had a fit." Honeydew said "Really scary."

Peculier nodded, "That would explain it… I felt this horrible pain." The old man said "that I would never see Daisy again, that all of this was for nothing. I saw him…" Peculier trailed off. At the mention of Israphel a new sense of urgency seemed to spring into the Lysander,

"You say you saw Israphel, Peculier? While you were delirious?" he asked, tugging his beard thoughtfully, "That makes it even more urgent we get to Mistral. You will need proper caring old man."

Peculier nodded and clutched his chest uneasily, "It was a terrible face…"

"Yeah Israphel's an ugly one." Honeydew agreed.

"I don't even think he's got that kind of face that only a mother could love." Xephos said.

"I feel kind of sorry for his mum honestly." Honeydew added "I mean think about it, how would you feel if you were the one who brought the pale - faced git into the world?"

Xephos smiled "Yeah that'd be pretty depressing… but really are you okay now Peculier?"

"I-I've been better." Peculier chuckled.

"Here, you can travel in the middle so we can protect each other." Xephos suggested. Lysander agreed,

"An excellent idea hero, if we are closer then I will be able to save you if another attack assails you Peculier. But first, are you feeling strong enough to walk?"

Peculier coughed "I think so."

Lysander smiled "That is well. We must not linger a moment longer heroes! The road to Mistral is long and poorly lit and danger could be waiting for us at any turn, and Notch forbids it should if Peculier has another attack."

Lysander immediately went back into his stride supporting Peculier. Xephos didn't like to think about it but Lysander was right; danger would soon fill up the night with every nightmare imaginable, especially creepers. Moreover, to Xephos' displeasure, the night was indeed getting darker every second if that was possible.

"Coming?" Honeydew asked fidgeting with his pickaxe.

"I would never miss it." Xephos smiled and fell into stride with his friend as they made their way into the night, their weapons drawn. The suddenness of Peculier's stroke let alone the terrible screams he had made had stunned him, apparently his condition was far more fragile than he would have guessed. As they traveled the light from the fires grew steadily dimmer and dimmer as an ominous marking of their progress.

"Feeling better?"

"What's feeling better?" Honeydew said quizzically. Xephos gestured to his head,

"Your head Simon."

"Oh, um – yeah it's a bit better thanks." Honeydew replied with a weak smile.

"How's the old man holding up?"

"He's still with Lysander." Honeydew replied.

"Light torches!" Lysander commanded. This order was followed by a great deal of fumbling and cursing as Xephos and Honeydew tried to get their torches out of their overloaded packs without bumping into something and keeping up with Lysander. _Probably should've organized this a bit better_ … Xephos thought in irritation.

Xephos had been standing on the ice for such a long time that he hadn't noticed that everything had gone suddenly quiet around him. Xephos gazed ahead through the gloom; there was nobody there! _Where is the bridge?_ he thought nearly slipping on the ice. _Or for that matter,_ Xephos paused _where the hell is everyone?_ He stumbled and struggled to find his bearings.

"Come on! Really? Dammit I've fallen behind!" Xephos swore loudly and glanced around him. He couldn't see anything except for a few dark spots on the ice. Maybe it was melting? _In the middle of winter?_ Xephos wondered, drawing closer, wood. The word hit him like a bomb; it was what was left of the bridge, long since blown to bits.

"Hello!" a voice cried through the night. Xephos spun around.

"What the -"

Where was the voice coming from? _Honeydew?_ Xephos took a deep breath and plunged into the night.


	2. The Road to Mistral

**SOI Chapter 2: The Road to Mistral**

 **A/N: In this chapter a new character is introduced into the mix. Trust me; you'll enjoy this one a lot.**

 **Edited and updated as of 8/8/2015. - It's really amazing how much one chapter improves after editing the first draft!**

Xephos cursed as he slipped on the ice. "Anyone there?" he called once he had regained his balance.Strangely there was no response to his query. Xephos peered into the night in search of the source of the youthful voice but he couldn't see anything.

"Lysander?" Xephos called "Honeydew! Simon?" there was no answer as he stumbled and slipped a second time over the black ice. Surely the rest of the group was around somewhere? After all they hadn't been traveling for very long.

"Old Peculier!" Xephos bellowed loudly enough so even Peculier – who was partially deaf - could hear him. "Anyone there?!"

"Peculier who? Sounds like a peculiar name to me." a voice replied. Xephos registered the voice immediately as the youthful one that had greeted him moments before. Xephos froze as a crackle of ice broke the silence and a shape of a man stepped out of the gloom and approached him. Xephos gripped the diamond blade uncertain of what to expect. He raised his sword as the crackling grew louder.

"Who are you?" The stranger chuckled lightly showing a flash of white in what appeared to be a smile.

"I should ask you the same thing. What're you doing out here in the dark? No torches or anything huh? I'm surprised the mobs haven't gotten you yet." the voice asked almost mockingly. Xephos just stared at the outline of the stranger who appeared to be chuckling to himself. "Oh well here I've got extra torches – cause it seems _you_ haven't got any." A loud clanking noise followed and a flash of yellow-red light availed the night.

"Hello." The stranger grinned, he was a younger man with scratchy blond hair dressed in a commoner leather jerkin, a bow was slung over his back, and a very large knapsack lay atop of it. Suddenly the man's eyes grew wide at Xephos' raised diamond blade at his neck

"Oi! Don't point that thing at me! I'm not some bloody creeper… You do know that right?"

Xephos sheathed his sword, the man's image alone spoke friend. "Sorry…got a bit nervous. I'm

Xephos by the way."

The man seemed to register the name and looked at him in surprise.

"Xephos the spaceman?" Xephos nodded,

"Oh wow. Fancy meeting you! I'm your neighbor…or was. My name's Martin."

Xephos frowned,"My neighbor? Where'd you live anyway?"

Martin's smile faded. "In a little cabin by the lake but it's all burnt to ashes I'm afraid… anyway, never mind my cabin, I take it you're bound for Mistral? Or something?"

"Er…" Xephos stammered.

Martin looked at him quizzically. "You don't know why you're out here? Gone a bit off your rocker? Don't blame you honestly, seeing all that stuff you've seen…wow… that'd be enough for me! You could book my spot in some rubber room!"

"Yea-no. No! No! I was going to Mistral. I actually got stuck out here looking for extra torches! You know cause it was dark and stuff and there's no damn lighting around."

Martin laughed "Alright. I was wondering what you were doing - especially with all the mobs about. Anyway were you traveling by yourself or with someone else?"

"I was traveling with a dwarf, a Skylord and an old man; can you help me find them?" Xephos admitted, but the man just took it in stride.

"You got lost huh? I figured that." Martin said. "You were with a fellowship then?" Xephos nodded in confirmation.

"Do you know the way back to the bridge? That's the way they went I think."

"How long have you been out here?"

"Thirty minutes or so." Xephos replied.

"Thirty minutes?! They've probably noticed you're missing. I _hope_ they have or those are some bloody forgetful mates you've got there…" Martin murmured.

"I've been with them for many adventures!" Xephos said defensively.

Martin shrugged "Doesn't look like you'll be with them for this one though. Anyway hero I can take you all the way to Mistral if you want."

Xephos thought on this for a moment. Maybe they would be able to catch up with the rest of the fellowship on the way... _but then again_ …Xephos glanced at Martin… _I'll have to endure over a day with someone who makes Lysander seem modest…_

"There's loads of mobs out tonight you know." Martin interjected.

"I can handle them!" Xephos muttered.

"Yeah I know but there are a lot of them around… had to kill a few creepers just to find you out here." Martin said.

"Creepers? Oh uh right well – I accept!" Xephos said, forcing a smile. At least traveling with Martin wouldn't kill him Xephos reasoned _unless he starts talking too much and then I'm done for…_

"Wise choice hero. Come on let's get into the light." Martin started off maneuvering on the ice like a skater gracefully moving along the ice reaching the bridge well before Xephos whose hold on gravity was frequently wavering. Sliding and nearly falling continuously the spaceman stumbled up to the bridge meeting Martin roaring with laughter on an intact portion of the bridge.

"You move gracefully hero." He said grinning.

"I'm not a very good skater." Xephos admitted climbing up on the bridge joining Martin.

"You could _definitely_ say that again. It's a good thing there's no skating rink in Mistral or we'd never be able to get you out." Martin said cheekily. "Anyway this is the road to Mistral." Martin said gesturing across the bridge. Martin grabbed his bow knocking an arrow while signaling to Xephos.

Xephos suppressed a sigh and fell into step beside his new companion.

"You didn't pick a very good time to travel hero. The road to Mistral is full of holes and is largely very dark especially through Mirkwood- that forest up the road." Martin pointed up to the woods past the bridge, walking to the forest beckoning Xephos to follow as the pair melded into the forest. "The road is usually lit but as you can tell the Lamplighters have been really slacking lately… and of course it's not usually filled with random crap and holes as you might have noticed."

"Yeah I know it's a bit messy… who are the Lamplighters?"

"Never heard of them hero?" Xephos shook his head. Martin rolled his eyes.

"Alright, well obviously they light the lamps of the roads in and out of Mistral. But apparently they only do the roads _in_ Mistral and not the others. It's completely stupid if you ask me."

"Oh…yeah that does sound kind of stupid… Anyway, why's the bridge broken? I mean it doesn't look like anyone's been taking care of this for ages!" Xephos exclaimed, leaping over a pile of charred wood that had once been the far end of the bridge.

"Dunno hero, I don't know why it's all screwy." Martin said breezily.

"Why would someone burn the bridge?"

"I don't know. Crazy people maybe?" Martin laughed.

Xephos looked at the scene for a moment. Now it all made sense… "Israphel."

Martin cocked his head at him "Sorry? Isra-who?"

"Israphel, he must have burnt the bridge." Xephos explained "He's a-"

"Nutter." Martin finished "I mean, Israphel, who names their kids Israphel? Anyone with that name sounds a little off to me. Anyway we can't spend all our time looking at bridges, we have to get moving!"

With that Martin turned and bounded across the bridge and onto the trail across it.

"Yes... he _is_ a nutter but he's also evil and trying to _take over the world_ …but you didn't let me finish…" Xephos muttered as he slowly rejoined Martin on the other side.

"Ready to go?" Martin asked.

"So far." Xephos replied.

"Well… stay close… Don't need you getting lost twice in one night!" Martin said giving a brief laugh. Xephos sighed in annoyance and followed his newfound guide down the unlit road.

The road to Mistral City was poorly lit in most places and as Xephos quickly found out, thickly forested. Xephos wondered why there were so few torches on the road if it was so often used as he continuously planted torches along the road to see the frequently disrupted path ahead of them. _The Lamplighter's must be really stupid not to light all this…_ Xephos thought, increasingly irritated by the complete lack of any lighting on the road. Apparently, Xephos had been doing such a great job of lighting the road that Martin remarked that he could take over for the Mistral Lamplighters anytime.

It was several hours more until first light and Martin's stock of torches had finally run out, causing them to pause, while Xephos dig into his sack and found a pack of twenty extra torches. Xephos then gave ten of them to Martin and kept the other half for him, once this was done, the two continued along the trail. Around two hours later - or one a.m. by Martin's reckoning – they stopped nearby a cave in the middle of a clearing.

"What do you think? Good place for a rest?" Martin suggested.

"In the cave? There could be baddies in there." Xephos replied. Xephos had always been wary of dark caves as almost every time he walked into one some monster in it kept trying to kill him.

"Come on, what do you think I've got this bow for? If we encounter any monsters then I'll just shoot them to death!" Martin laughed. "By the way hero, do you need any arrows?"

"I'll use my sword, thanks. But you don't have to call me hero all the time." Xephos replied.

"What do you want to be called then?" Martin asked "Xephos the Great or something? Kind of a wordy title that."

Xephos shrugged "Xephos is fine. Or Xeph, it doesn't matter much to me but sometimes it feels like I don't have a first name anymore."

"Alright, Xephos then. I like it; it's got kind of a spacey ring to it."

"Thanks. Look I'll go in with my sword and everything but can you cover for me in the meantime?"

"Course I can." Martin said breezily. Xephos sighed as he walked torch in one hand and his diamond blade in the other towards the cave, dreading what waited inside.

Xephos entered the cave slowly and carefully _one step at a time, everything's okay_ he thought taking several deep breaths for good measure. He paused at the entrance and moved the torch around the interior of the cave. All he saw were a few coal ores, plenty of stone, dirt and a couple of mushrooms but no monsters _No mobs... thank Notch for that!_ Xephos thought as the spaceman walked a little farther into the cave.

"Alright… how far does this thing go?"Xephos muttered. Xephos as he planted a torch near the entrance and made his way into depth of the cave. The cave was small but fairly roomy, and did not extend anywhere far underground, and therefore he had managed to light up the entirety of it within a few minutes.

"All clear!" Xephos called, giving Martin the thumbs up.

"Brilliant." Martin responded, followed by his footsteps entering the cave's interior. "Nice place for a rest…"

"Do you have any sheets? It looks like you've got enough room for an entire mattress in that thing!" he said gesturing to overstuffed pack, which Martin was now sorting through.

"Heh. It's funny you should mention that hero cause I've got a few pillows…here you go." Martin muttered tossing a great white pillow which narrowly missed Xephos' head.

Xephos frowned at him, "What was that for?"

"Sorry about that I thought you were ready." Martin said ruefully. Xephos threw a glance back to the cave entrance before turning back to his companion,

"It's alright, I wouldn't mind a warning next time though. Actually… have you got anything to keep the baddies out?"

"A few sheets but that's about it aside from my bow, my sword and my fists."

"You don't have any planks in there?" Xephos looked at Martin doubtfully. It looked like he had that and more in his enormous pack anyways. Martin shook his head.

"Oh perfect…" Xephos sighed "Just perfect. Alright, well I don't have any planks or stone or anything either. Are you sure you don't have any planks?"

"Yep. I do have about… seven bed sheets but I don't think draping one over it will keep the mobs out. They'd probably think we're having a slumber party or something." Martin said.

"You have seven bedsheet? Did you pack your entire house in there or something?" Xephos asked incredulously. Martin chuckled and shook his head,

"Almost. I couldn't quite fit the planks in it though."

"Alright… if we don't have something to block up the entrance maybe one of us ought to stand watch?" Xephos suggested.

"Yeah, okay you stand watch while I sleep." Martin agreed. "Well you _are_ the hero in this relationship…" he said weakly. Xephos glared at him.

"Oh alright then. We'll take it in turns." Xephos suggested. "You can relieve me at three. I want to get some sleep sometime!" Martin smiled at this and lay down on a stony outcrop near the cave wall.

"Good night he - OUCH!" he yelled, nearly making Xephos jump. "Forgot my stupid pillow." Martin said clutching the back of his head in pain.

Xephos grabbed an extra pillow and threw it at him. "Go to bed!"

Martin laughed and tucked the pillow under his head and while lay his cloak over his body- and within ten minutes he was asleep.

Xephos stood guard at the entrance of the cave, although as closely to the torchlight as possible as it would blind most monsters who ventured too closely. He gazed out in the night, but he couldn't get comfortable, physically or mentally. Xephos' thoughts were occupied by Honeydew and the rest of the fellowship. How had he lost them so easily? It was Xephos' most recurring thought. He sighed in annoyance. How had it happened? Hadn't anyone noticed he was missing when he got lost in the dark?

For a brief moment Xephos wondered if the rest of the fellowship was okay. _No they'll be fine. We've made it through the night dozens of times. Whatever's out there, they can take it._ Xephos thought reflecting back to older days when he and Honeydew hunted mobs in the night and in the often dark caverns under the cave where they had mined for years.

Xephos turned and glanced back at his sleeping companion. Was it more than just a coincidence that his house had been burned down just like the cave? _Did Israphel do that too?_ Xephos thought. _Did he take your home too?_ Xephos nearly broke into tears to think about it. He hadn't been upset at first as there had been much more important things to deal with at the time. But now Xephos had time to think about what had transpired. He gazed out into the night, the path was a short distance away and further from that were a section of trees, which were stark against the landscape being barren of leaves. _How many homes have you taken with you Israphel?_ Xephos thought _how many lives?_ He sighed as he listened to the moans of a distant zombie _; the world wasn't always like this was it?_

Xephos broke out of his thoughts and checked his clock. It read three in the morning, he sighed _what a night_. Slowly he picked himself up and walked over to the figure of Martin. After waking up a very annoyed Martin to let him know it was his turn Xephos laid down on the stone slab, tried to get comfortable and forced himself to sleep.

Dawn broke quickly, with the rising sun in the east. Xephos' odd new companion seemed to welcome the sunlight on his back; it inspired in him something he must've thought he'd forgotten. Martin stopped abruptly shouldering his cumbersome longbow kneeling to read a sign posted to a nearby birch tree.

"Eleven kilometers to Mistral, we're halfway there hero – I mean _Xephos_. That's what you want me to call you right? Anyways, you'll see the spires of Mistral by early mid-morning tomorrow, it is always a sight." Martin explained wistfully his eyes clouding for a moment. _It must be a sight since there aren't any buildings miles around it!_ Xephos thought wily.

"Did you live at Mistral?" Xephos asked as Martin got up again, pulling an apple out of his pack.

"Oh yeah. I do actually. I'm a peddler you see." Martin said hefting the pack.

"You're a peddler?"

"Course I am!" Martin replied indignantly "What'd you think I was carrying this pack around for? Because I like back pain? Or did you think I've got a lifetime supply of Jaffa cakes in here?"

"Well – um no not exactly, although you _did_ have half a bedroom in it."

"Actually I'm not joking, I do have a _pretty_ large supply of Jaffa's but they're not all in here… couldn't fit that many of em without squishing some." Martin smiled "As for Mistral- It's a very large city, the pride of the world. You know nothing about Mistral huh? That Skylord friend of yours never told you anything?"

"No he was a bit light on the details."

"Too bad. You should have got out more. But then again you _did_ live under a rock for a couple years." Martin smirked. Xephos suppressed the urge to call him a git and pressed on with his question,

"How does the whole bowman – peddler thing work? Doesn't it get a bit burdensome?"

Martin shrugged, "Not that much. I hunt with my bow and sell from my pack."

 _That really works then?_ Xephos wondered as he gazed at the enormous pack. _Maybe he takes it in turns? That could work…_

"As a trader I get a lot of good business in town, from the meat market, the mayor, the Skylords, all the other people. Too bad you haven't been to Mistal before, it's very diverse." Martin continued haughtily. Xephos nodded and suppressed the urge to tell his companion to shut up. In the meantime Martin continued on about the city and his travels there as they continued through the countryside.

"I didn't know Mistral existed until two weeks ago, when I met a Skylord, Skylord Lysander." Martin did not register the name

"Never heard of him, he's one of your friends?"

"Yeah.

"Oh right," Martin continued taking no notice of Xephos' reservations. "Your friends, they ought to be nearly at Mistral by now…"

"Probably, yeah. This whole thing is really stupid." Xephos sighed "I don't know how I lost them in the first damn place."

"Not your fault you got lost." Martin sympathized "Especially since it's your first trip and the road is _never_ lit. Anyway did your companions tell you where they'd be staying?"

"Oh uh I don't know." Xephos admitted. Martin stared at him,

"You don't know?" he laughed "You were going to Mistral and you didn't plan out where to go? Ha! Well, I wish you luck finding them now!"

"Agh!" Xephos said in annoyance "You're right… d'you reckon they're staying at an inn or something?"

"Yeah they're either there or with that Skylord friend of yours, but for the time being you can stay with me at my place. I've got a room at an inn in Mistral, nice and cozy." Martin said, clearly pleased with his altruism.

"Thanks." Xephos said "But I was planning staying with Skylord Lysander."

Martin shrugged and brushed back his hair from his forehead. "Suit yourself hero. But if you don't find your friends you'll need somewhere to stay and my offer stands. Mistral's a big city and it can be a bit tricky to find your way about even if you've lived there for years."

"Um - thanks. I accept!" Xephos smiled weakly. Martin was right, there might be a very good chance that they wouldn't find Lysander or Honeydew for some time in the city if it really was as big as he said it was. _Even so,_ Xephos thought, _I hope it doesn't last too long otherwise I'll either have to move out or keep talking to this arrogant prat for ages!_

"Brilliant!" Martin smiled "'Fraid I didn't cook anything and the place is in a bit of a mess, wasn't expecting visitors you know."

"That's fine. Anything's an improvement over nothing I guess." Xephos said glumly.

"That makes two of us," Martin nodded, taking a bite out of a piece of bread he had just pulled from his pack. "although _I_ still have a residence, thank Notch. Speaking of which, what's your story hero?"

Xephos shot him a look "My story?"

Martin handing Xephos an extra piece of bread which he took after giving Martin a brief thanks.

"Yeah smart one. Your story. Come on, you can tell me. I'm interested in your welfare!"

"I used to live in the cave by the sea; with Honeydew for a few years…it's a long story to be honest." Xephos admitted.

"Long story huh? Yeah I figured that. You couldn't have lived under a rock _the entire_ time right?" Martin laughed. Xephos forced a smile at this,

"Besides we're basically strangers and there's plenty of time." Martin continued, glancing up at the sky. "And I don't think you have anything to hide, right?"

"I don't think I've got much to hide that you haven't heard already." Martin nodded,

"True that but I still want to hear it."

"Alright, alright do you want to hear the whole thing or the abridged version?" Xephos asked sarcastically.  
"It doesn't matter much to me but I'd probably prefer the abridged version more." Martin said.

And with that, Xephos jumped into his story. All the way from when he met Honeydew, eleven or twelve years before, to their encounter with old Peculier and the massacre at Terrorvale and after skipping over most of their time on the survival island – to the airship crash at the cave.

"And now you're on a mission to save the world?" Martin smirked "That's noble."

"It is!" Xephos agreed "What's your story then? I've told you mine, you tell me yours."

"I'm a trader, I already told you. Weren't you listening?"

"Alright then, keep your secrets." Xephos said.

Martin laughed, took another bite out of his bread and began his tale. He had been born in Icaria, and had grown up there. During that time, Martin had been trained as a peddler by his father who had been a well renowned trader and had been a quartermaster for the Templars of Verigan's Hold before he was born. At sixteen he had left home to start out on his own after his parents separated.

"And since then I've been working between Mistral, Icaria and Verigan's Hold!" Martin finished. "That is my tale. Anyway let's get a move on hero." He said abruptly noticing the remarkable lack of progress they had made in the past hour.

"Why? What time is it?" Xephos asked. They had been talking for so long he had forgotten the time.

He said shifting his bow off his shoulder knocking an arrow. "Nearly two, dusk's at five and nighttime's at six, so we'd better get a move on if we don't want to get caught out."

Xephos drew his sword from its sheath.

"Yep. I know _exactly_ what you mean."

Xephos gazed nervously at the woodlands several hundred feet ahead of him, which appeared to be completely dark. A light winter breeze blew from the interior sending a cold ruffle through Xephos' cloak, sending a chill down his spine. Xephos took a step back and surveyed the woods for a moment; the woodlands appeared to be composed almost entirely of tall pine trees and was interspersed in several places by bare oak and ash trees.

"Is this Mirkwood?" he asked. Martin and tossed an apple to him,

"You hungry?"

"Thanks." Xephos bit into the apple as they rested briefly on the outskirt of the wood.

Martin said gestured grandly to the dark woodland "Yep hero, this is Mirkwood, and it will take us a couple hours to cross it. The wood's about seven kilometers or so long. It's around three and we should be out of the woods by five or six if we move quickly…" Xephos gripped his diamond blade tightly, four hours of traveling in a dark woodland full of mobs did not sound like something he was eager to do.

"Are you sure we can't go around it?" Xephos asked. Martin glanced at him,

"You nervous?"

"Definitely." Xephos admitted.

"What? I never thought heroes were scared at anything!"

"No." Xephos laughed.

"Fair enough," Martin said "The problem is, this wood extends for a few hundred kilometers to the east and even farther to the west. We could walk the distance but it might be a few weeks before we reach Mistral not to mention traveling _that_ far would be a real pain on the feet."

Xephos groaned. Oh no! Several hundred kilometers? That was just perfect!

"Alright, alright… I'll tough it out."

"The woods it is then! Right! Well, good luck, and run if you hear a hissing." Martin said.

Xephos gave a nervous laugh, and as they ventured forwards and melded into the dark of Mirkwood he couldn't help feeling that they had made a very bad mistake.

Xephos carried the torch precariously in his hand as he and Martin set a rigorous pace through the pine woodland. From time to time Martin would call out to Xephos how far they had gone since they entered the woodland and at last count he had estimated about two thirds the ways through it. Even so, Xephos began to wonder if he would ever see the sun again, as the only light to be found in Mirkwood was that of their torches. As the pair made their way through the woodland, it became increasingly clear to Xephos the place was called Mirkwood for a reason. The interior of the forest was almost entirely void of light, it had been dimly lit when they entered it – several hours before - and at this point, it was pitch black save for the occasional moonlit patch where there was a break in the trees.

However, the difficulty of navigating the darkness was only compounded by grass and trees, which obscured the path in many places. Nevertheless, thanks to double torchlight and Martin's long navigation experience the pair was able to make their way through the wood while rarely straying from the path. At this moment Xephos was closely monitoring the path holding his torch as low as he could to the ground without stooping looking for gravel spots to mark the way. Martin was a short distance ahead but to his side as the path was relatively wide and he marked the trail occasionally with a torch to keep their bearings.

Xephos was studying the ground so closely that he didn't notice the tree grown in the center of the path feet in front of him.

"OUCH!" he yelled landing on the ground, cursing loudly. Xephos struggled to get up as the diamond chestplate ground into his chest uncomfortably and blood spurted from his side. Martin whirled around arrow nocked pointing it at Xephos, his eyes wild.

"Don't point it at me!" Xephos exclaimed.

"Sorry!" Martin said as he threw off his pack and quiver rushing over to the spaceman. Xephos was bleeding slowly from his right arm, his own sword impaled slightly on it. Mercifully he sported no other injuries than the cut aside from a small lump on his forehead where he had hit his head against a stone.

"Sorry, sorry. Don't worry I'm alright." Xephos muttered as he jerked the tip of the sword out of his arm. "Have you got any bandages?" he asked an incredulous Martin who just laughed.

"Of course hero, it's just a shallow cut- thank Notch. We should be able to staunch the bleeding fairly easily."

"Brilliant." Xephos said rolling over and pulling his pack over to him. Shortly thereafter, Martin returned with a few large strips of wool in hand. He then bent over Xephos and gently wrapped the wool strips around the wound.

Several seconds later, Martin tied off the wool bandage and examined his handiwork for a moment before stepping away.

"Feeling better?"

"Saintlike." Xephos replied.

"Alright, let's see… there's not really any time to fix that here." Martin assessed "Fumblemore should be able to take care of you at Mistral." Xephos frowned at him.

"Uh – excuse me – did you say Fumblemore?

"Obviously. Alright we better hurry, no matter how many trees we bump into…" Xephos shook his head in irritation; _I'm never going to hear the end of that one am I?_

Xephos stood and shouldered his pack carefully to not disturb the makeshift bandage Martin had applied. In less than a minute Xephos was back on his feet carrying the diamond blade with his other arm and the torch with his injured one, with Martin leading the way.

"Who's Fumblemore?" Xephos asked. Martin didn't slow his step at the query

"The wizard of Mistral City hero He's supposed to be old and wise." Martin called back.

"Um -supposed to be?" Xephos wondered aloud, Martin paused,

"Well you'd better worry about that when we get to Mistral hero. According to my clock…it's around seven so it's night." _Great_ Xephos thought picturing himself being trapped in Mirkwood for the night.

"But why do I need a wizard to heal a cut?" Xephos exclaimed. "I mean, it's just a shallow cut!"

"Normal healing methods won't be able to cure a cut from a diamond blade. I don't know why but they never seem to heal without some kind of magical treatment." Martin said. "Speaking of which, how's the bandage holding up?"

"Oh – pretty good. It itches a little." Xephos informed him.

"That's good. Mind you, try tucking the edges in; it makes it itch a bit less." Martin suggested.

"I'm okay, at least it works."

"Brilliant."

Shortly thereafter, Martin paused once more to notch another torch onto the side of a nearby birch tree.

"Hey spaceman good news!" he smiled "Three kilometers to Mistral! We're nearly there." He said as a clearing illuminated by the torches, appeared from the gloom.

 _They're probably already there_ Xephos thought as the images of Lysander, Honeydew and Peculier came to mind. Again Xephos cursed himself for his unpreparedness back there on the ice. He sighed and fell into step with Martin, sheathed his sword for good measure, and made his way out of Mirkwood onto the final leg of the journey to Mistal.

At short length they reached the end of the woods, it was completely dark outside. The trail ahead of them led to a sparsely wooded moorish landscape. The pair smiled in relief; it was good to be out of the woodland at last and closer to Mistral too! And at least in the clearing he didn't have to worry about bumping into any more trees and doing himself an injury.

Martin gave an odd and abruptly dropped his pack on the ground and began forging for something gleefully. Xephos frowned at him,

"What are you doing?"

In response Martin pulled out two loaves of bread and handed one to Xephos.

"Fancy a slice?" Martin asked devouring the bread hungrily. "Baked it myself actually."

"Thanks." Xephos said, as his wound had since inspired a new appetite in him.

Martin planted several torches around them to ward off any monsters while Xephos sat down and ate. Absentmindedly Xephos checked his wool-strip bandage, it was holding well. The blood had hardly left a stain but merely a dark patch on his royal red- colored shirt. Xephos took a moment to tuck in the edges of the bandage as Martin suggested. After doing so the bandage itched slightly less.

"Is it working for you hero?" Martin asked, sitting on a patch of moss near him. Xephos shot the Bowman a quizzical look. "The itching." Martin said making a scratching motion.

"Yeah- it's a bit better. Thanks for the tip." Xephos said.

"Are we going to Mistral tonight?" Xephos asked as he and Martin finished their meal – which included diced apples, bread and two cooked steaks. Martin nodded wiping his hands on his extremely dirty handkerchief.

"I'd like to…" Martin sighed.

"But what?" Xephos asked.

But- if we left now and ran all the bloody way there we'd still reach Mistral by eight. The trouble is, the gates close at six." Martin finished. Xephos stared at him and shook his head.

"I don't get it. Why do the gates close at six? Isn't that a bit early?"

"I don't know hero." Martin said simply. "Things have changed – they only started closing the gates early in the past month." Xephos thought about Martin's statement for a moment.

"Only the past month? What changed?"

Martin rolled his eyes, "I don't know the world or something like that. The Mayor – he thinks it's dangerous to keep the gates open at night because of all the monsters that have been spawning lately. Although I've heard that the real reason is, he saw one a few months ago and _completely_ lost his nerve."

"Yeah well, he _has_ got a point." Xephos pointed out.

"True- but the coward's also got an army of guards protecting him so what's to worry about?" Martin scoffed "Honestly, its complete rubbish."

"Why are you helping me?" the question was on his lips before he could stop it, Martin shrugged.

"Why wouldn't I help you smart one? I mean, when I'd seen what happened to you…well you looked like a lost deer out there on the ice." Xephos laughed picking up his pack flinging it carefully over his back.

"If Honeydew was here, it'd be a trip. You wouldn't have any food left for starters!"

"Oh the dwarf? Yeah I bet that'd been a tale worth telling, a real winner. Something like the 'Dwarf and the very, very big appetite', I swear I can just see it now!" Xephos laughed.

"Besides, why would I let you die? To steal all the goods you don't have?" Martin added sarcastically.

"Really? How do you know I don't have something you don't?" Xephos retorted.

"I don't." Martin said simply "Just my pack has loads more crap in it than yours does! So I don't need anything else!" they both laughed at this.

"Oh cripes I'm bleeding again…" Xephos paused alarmed and oddly curious at the sight of the sticky blood that had started seeping through the wool bandage. Before he had time to react the peddler was on his feet and reaching into his pack, pulling out another cut strand of wool.

"Put this on, there's no time to do anything about it here." Martin said grimly, handing Xephos the wool strip. Martin gestured to beyond the woodland past the setting sun "We can make it if we hurry. You can manage alright then?" Martin asked slight concern entering his voice. Xephos nodded, shifting himself upright holding the sword out with his good arm and clenching the extra wool strip with the other.

"You might want to replace that old bandage while you're at it." Martin pointed out "That's not really hygienic you know, wearing old bandages."

"Well I figured that. But thanks anyways…" Xephos said absentmindedly as he changed his bandage with minimal bleeding. At the same time, Martin put out all the torches and put everything extra in his pack.

"So where are we staying?" Xephos asked.

"Well." Martin started, holding the lit torch looking around the moor. "I'm assuming you don't want to take our chances out here so… there ought to be a cave we can stay around here somewhere.

Xephos held his torch doing his best to keep pace with him with a grim expression on his face. The idea of exploring yet another cave did not sound particularly appealing to him but neither did the idea of shivering outside with a few hundred mobs.

"Here it is!" Martin said with measured enthusiasm. Xephos glanced at the spot he was standing by. There was a small opening in the ground leading to a pit of darkness down below. Xephos didn't like it, the first cave was far more convenient whereas this one had the look and feel of a death trap.

"Yeah uhh - who's going in first?" Xephos uncertainly. Martin shrugged and pulled out his iron short sword,

"We might as well do it together. It'd probably be safer that way" Xephos held his diamond blade out in front of him and gradually lowered himself into the cave after Martin gave the interior a once over with his torch for any mobs or drop-offs.

Once inside the cave they hurriedly placed two torches to illuminate the place. Xephos glanced around looking for any sign of a monster. Suddenly there was a low moan from behind him. Xephos whirled around his sword raised, but Martin was quicker. An arrow was protruding from the skull of the zombie which had been dragging itself towards him.

"Nice shot." Xephos panted. Martin laughed shakily,

"Good thing we placed those torches huh?"

"Martin look out!" Xephos yelled as an arrow whizzed by his head. Martin dodged to the side as just as another arrow flew by.

"Skeleton." Martin spat, nocking an arrow. He was right, as Xephos saw the bony, white outline of the skeleton quickly moving towards him, its bony fingers drawing its bow for another shot. Quickly Xephos jumped to the right just as the arrow hit the spot where he was a moment before. Leaning against the cave wall Xephos heard the sudden clink of bones and a unearthly shriek which could only mean that Martin had hit his target. Xephos smiled in relief,

"All clear?" he asked. The shape of Martin abruptly appeared before him

"I think it is, for the moment. But we better watch it hero- this place is crawling with mobs!"

"You want to choose a different cave now?" Xephos asked sardonically.

"Well… normally I'd definitely be up for that. But this time it's too late for that." Martin said as they heard several more moans nearby. The two companions rushed off around the right corner of the cave to encounter several more zombies slowly stumbling towards them.

"Whoa!" Xephos yelled, stumbling backwards and narrowly avoiding the swipe of an eyeless zombie which had suddenly appeared from behind a corner. Regaining his footing, Xephos took a swing at the undead's neck and with that it was over – the zombie's head rolled across the floor and its body collapsed. But as soon as he had killed one zombie another took his place- this time holding a shovel, which it was trying to bludgeon him with. Xephos stepped to the side as the zombie slammed the floor with the shovel causing a loud bang. The thing moaned and slowly started backing him into a corner.

"Alright c'mon you bugger…" Xephos cursed and slashed at the zombie cleanly cutting its shovel in two, but to his dismay the thing kept moving forward. Xephos was almost against the wall of the cave as the zombie rapidly stumbled towards him. The undead opened its mouth and groaned loudly, reaching for him with a rotten, reddish hand. Xephos yelled and slashed at the zombie again this time opening a large cut in the its belly but then the zombie reached for him the instant his sword arm was down and grabbed him there. The thing's grip was powerful and Xephos struggled to free his arm as the zombie tugged on him groaning.

"Oi! Get- off of ME!" Xephos cried as the zombie moved its mouth down to bite him. The spaceman quickly used his free arm and stabbed the zombie with the end of his lit torch. Almost instantly the zombie let him go, and howled. Xephos had never heard a zombie scream before; it was a horrible unearthly sound which made him at the knees. The zombie stumbled backwards; the thing was burning to death. Xephos leaned against the wall, panting heavily as the undead howled one last time and collapsed, charred to ash.

Xephos walked forwards and prodded the remains of the zombie with his sword; there was no response- the thing had gotten the horrible end it deserved. He gave a sigh of relief - turned away to keep from puking at the horrible sight - and reached in his pack for an extra torch. All was finally quiet in the cave, no moans, no hisses, and not even the twang of a Skeleton's arrow. Xephos had never been so glad to finally hear the sweet sound of silence.

Xephos struck his torch on the craggy cave wall and slowly progressed through the cave.

"Martin" he called.

There was no response. Xephos started walking down the cave towards where they had entered the cave and tried again. "Martin?"

"Hero?" Martin replied. Xephos smiled,

"Are you okay?"

"Of course I'm alright. I've been through this… loads of times." Martin said sounding slightly shaky. Xephos rounded the corner of the cave and glanced at his companion. Martin's cloak was covered in gunpowder; upon seeing Xephos he whirled around and fired an arrow in his direction.

"Oi!" Xephos yelped, jumping behind the corner.

"Oh, sorry! Sorry!" Martin called. "It's alright; I thought you were a creeper."

Xephos peeked around the corner. The bow was slung across Martin's back again. He sighed and walked towards him.

"Well for your information- I'm not." Xephos said "Did you get attacked by one?"

Martin nodded and sat down on a nearby rock.

"Yeah, it almost got me. If I had been just a few feet closer I'd be all over the place." Martin said gesturing to the cave wall in front of them. Part of the wall had been blasted to rubble.

"Are you okay hero? How did you fair with the mobs?"

"I'm alright." Xephos said "Almost got bit by a zombie back there but it didn't break the skin. Are you sure that creeper didn't get any of you?" Martin smiled weakly.

"Thank Notch he didn't. I checked and as far as I know I'm not missing any parts or at least nothing essential anyway. What about your cut?"

"Oh it's nice and lovely. It's bleeding and crap like it's been for the past day." Xephos said sarcastically.

Martin looked at him in concern. "It's not bleeding a lot is it?"

"Nah, only enough to make me _slightly_ nervous but not enough to make me panic." Xephos said. Martin laughed,

"Okay. We can change your bandages later then."

Xephos scratched his head "Yeah I'm really – uh – looking forward to that moment… Anyways, how far does this bloody cave go?" Xephos asked. "On your end."

"Not far. Don't worry it's all lit up now." Martin said gesturing to his end of the cave, which was almost glowing with torchlight. "What about your end spaceman? And please tell me you lit all of it."

"It's lit. But I think I just _might_ have fulfilled my need for adventure for tonight." Martin smirked,

"Really? Are you sure you don't want to explore some more nice, big, dark caves? I think I saw a few nearby." Xephos shook his head,

"Good one and no thank you. I respectfully decline your invitation to get me killed."

"Killed? What makes you think that all caves have monsters in them?" Martin asked.

"Only the few hundred times I've walked into one and some zombie's tried to kill me." Xephos deadpanned "I've started to see a bit of a trend there you know."

"I was only joking." Martin said.

"Yeah I thought so…" Xephos murmured. Martin laughed,

"Anyway, at least we can sleep now. As long as this place stays lit no more baddies should be spawning any time soon."

"Great, but _you're_ taking the first watch." Xephos said quickly.

"Didn't sleep well last night huh?"

"Hmm…" Xephos said sarcastically "Let's see... I got three hours of sleep so no- I didn't."

"Alright." Martin smiled "I'll take the first watch; you have four hours to sleep. That's double the time so make good use of it." Xephos didn't need telling twice, after nearly being eaten alive by a zombie the spaceman had more than enough excitement for the night. Xephos carefully folded one of Martin's traveling cloaks on the floor near the cave wall and then after putting Lysander's cloak on top of it he lay down and fought his way to sleep.

Seemingly no time had passed before Xephos woke up to the gleaming sunshine that was streaming through the entryway onto his face.

"Good morning friend!" Martin called cheerily looking down at him. "Have a nice rest?"

"Wh- what time is it?" Xephos asked rubbing his eyes blearily.

"Six in the morning I think. Do you have a clock?"

"Yeah… wait hang on did you say six?!" Xephos exclaimed "I-I'm sorry you weren't awake the whole time were you?" Martin shrugged.

"It's alright hero. I tried getting you up around four but you were out more than my gran during one of her naps." Xephos' stared at him.

"So…" he groaned and slowly got up off the stony floor. "So you're not tired or anything?"

"A little I guess." Martin admitted "It got a bit boring but I'm pretty conscious. It's my hunter's mentality – keeps me awake."

"Um – okay, are we leaving now or something?" Xephos asked bemusedly. "You look all packed up so I just thought…"

"Nah, with you asleep on your feet we wouldn't make it half a kilometer!" Martin laughed.

"Oh, yeah whatever." Xephos said.

"Here, eat this first." Martin chucked a bread loaf to him. Xephos caught it and took a bite, the bread was stale but it was surprisingly good.

"Thanks."

"Hey, don't mention it." Martin replied as he moved past Xephos and picked up his traveling cloak taking a moment to stuff it into his pack. Xephos polished off the small loaf - picked up his own pack and bow - and slung both of them over his back.

"Are there any baddies out there?" Xephos asked. Normally it took several hours before most monsters finally died, which they usually did unless it rained.

"I don't think so." Martin said. "I checked an hour ago and it should be pretty safe especially since we're out of Mirkwood."

"Not too many trees either?" Xephos asked jokingly. Martin smiled,

"Not too many but I'd still watch your step if you're worried."

Xephos shrugged. "No not really. At least we don't have to fight trees. I'm ready if you are."

With that, the two exited the perilous cave and set off towards Mistral City at a brisk pace. Earlier in the trip Martin had said Xephos would see the spires of Mistral by dawn, and for once, he was glad he was right.

 **A/N: I had a lot of fun writing the dialogue for this chapter.**

 **Martin is pretty arrogant isn't he? His relationship with Xephos is a little funny although he seems to be getting used to him by the end. Anyway, will Xephos be able to regroup with the fellowship? And what role will Martin play in the future?**

 **Read on to find out.**


	3. The Dream

**SOI Chapter 3: The Dream**

 **A/N: I know this chapter needs a TON of editing. Either way it's all I have for now. Read, review and enjoy!**

In the far north there lay a house, on the lower part of the land near a large lake. It was very dark outside, and the rain pounded thunderously upon the roof of the little house. It had been this way for years, but the house always stood there unmoving, as if it was a testament to the statement that some things never changed. And, as always the interior of the house was well lit, with a warm wood fireplace and many torches. The place was well furnished as well, with plenty of comfortable chairs that had been collected over the years by its owners. The current owner of the house was an old balding man who was currently sitting in an armchair directly over the window; which he had also done for a time that felt like many years.

The old man had traveled to this place, nearly every night waiting for the man who never seemed to come. His father was that man, he had left the balding man when he was just a child for the desert and had never returned. The balding man would wait as long as he had too for his father, he would come back, the old man was sure of it. The old man was gazing at the portrait of his father. The portrait was clearly made when his father was far younger, as it depicted him with rich brown hair and almost tragic looking dark brown eyes.

Suddenly amidst the rain and win there was a clap of thunder and then a flash of bright lightning near the window. There it was, only for an instant, a pale face in the night, with horrible red eyes peering through the window. The old man gave a shout, jumping out of his chair he rushed to the window, but there was no more sight of the strange face, it was gone. Sighing, the old man wiped his eyes trying to put the pale face out of his mind after all no living creature had such a fantastical complexion! Such sights, the old man reasoned were merely a trick of the light.

All quiet save for the pounding rain sank upon the house, the old man calmed down at last settled back into his chair leaning over to pick up the book he had been reading earlier. The book was old, and tattered; even the crimson cross on its front was beginning to fade.

The man's father, one of the Templar Kings of Verigan's Hold, which the book was about, had written the book. The old man sat with his hand on the cover and thought about his father for a moment. His father… the man had hardly any living memory of him but had heard tell from his uncle that his father was a strong man, and in his time he had been a hero of the world. Where had his father gone? The old man had reflected many times before on this very question about his father. When the old man was a child his father had disappeared, suddenly and mysteriously on the same dark and stormy night to which he had somehow returned to, even more in recent nights as far as the old man could remember.

"Where are you father?" the old man asked as he looked at the author's name of the book, Karpath Peculier.

"Good evening my son." A voice answered him back. The voice, it was a chilled taunting voice just like the one he had been heard Father John talk in before the massacre at Terrorvale. The old man paused and stared in disbelief at the sudden appearance of no less than the Reverend John.

"No!" the old man cried, the Reverend had appeared and he was quite real the old man was sure of it. "What do you want?!" he cried at John "There is nothing for you here!"

"Oh but there is…" John's disembodied voice replied, causing the hairs on the old man's neck to rise in fear.

"B-but you died! I saw you die!" the old man forced the words out. John just smiled at him, his smile was bloody with a long scar on his upper lip, and he was enjoying the old man's fear.

"Even in death there is life." The Reverend said simply. "As for your request let me show you…" John hissed as he stepped forwards to the old man. The old man couldn't run he was rooted to the spot as the deranged Reverend stepped closer, his black cloak sweeping the floor. Suddenly the Reverend placed his hand on the old man's head and all went black.

The old man was young again; he was in his forties possibly even his thirties. He was back in Terrorvale; the town was bathed in sun and was bustling with inhabitants and people. The old man's younger self was laughing and holding hands with an equally young woman with long beautiful blond hair. They were going to Church, Reverend John was there too, smiling and greeting the members of his parish. Life was beautiful again, the old man sighed as he watched wistfully.

But then the heroes, Xephos and Honeydew appeared and suddenly everything turned gray, his younger self was older now, the beautiful woman was missing. But the heroes were there, killing and attacking the town's inhabitants, Reverend John tried to stop them but he too was overpowered. The heroes came back then and enlisted the help of the old man.

"We need your help!"

"Yeah, old man to help save Daisy…" Xephos said, his lip curling into a malevolent smile. The old man couldn't remember why he had come with them, after all they had done but he followed them blithely along anyway. The old man always ate alone while Xephos and Honeydew ate together laughing and killing wild things.

Then there was another flash of grey and suddenly they were tumbling down towards the cave. There was a flash of fire and then black that cleared to show another scene. The old man was in the cave and he could see the heroes talking but he couldn't hear what they were saying, he was too far away. The two were drawing their swords then and advancing on him! They were going to kill him! But he couldn't move and Xephos and Honeydew, his two friends drew closer and closer then Xephos reached back and moved his sword to the old man's chest.

"You shouldn't have trusted us…" Xephos said smirking horribly as the blade spiraled towards his heart.

"Make it stop! Please!" the old man found himself crying. It couldn't be true, his two friends, his companions would never betray him like that! Suddenly, the hand was removed from his forehead and the old man felt new warmth like the changing from the spring to summertime. The old man shuddered as he faded back into reality from the horrible world he had submerged into.

"You know it to be true…" John said. The old man struggled and fidgeted in his chair.

"It is not! They didn't kill me!" Peculier yelled.

"Did you see their betrayal?" the Reverend asked surveying the old man closely.

"Betrayal? It was a dream!" the old man exclaimed. "A dream of your foul conjurations John!"

"Do you know it to be untrue?" John asked giving Peculier a doubting look. The old man fidgeted in his chair, "It's not true! They saved me in Terrorvale and killed you. You fiend!"

"Fiend am I?" John asked with another bloody smile "Why am I so evil to you my son?" he asked tauntingly.

"Don't call me that! You're not my father!" Peculier yelled angrily. "Why are you here? What do you want?" John gave a deep sigh at the old man's request. "I think you'd better come along Peculier…there is a great deal I must tell you."

"Come along with you?" Peculier laughed "Come along with you so you can deliver me to your fiendish companions?"

"Fiendish companions? Oh I think you'll find your accommodations quite nice. You must understand my son that I am trying to help you – as a parent would educate a child." John said with a pitying look at Peculier that came off as a bloody smirk.

"Help me? Help me! You'd sooner kill me than help me. You and your son, Israphel!" Peculier spat getting out of the chair, his fists shaking with anger. All the old man wanted now was to be rid of his fiendish guest.

"You must understand Peculier, I am here to right a wrong a terrible wrong which seems to have infiltrated your mentality." John said softly.

"Indeed!" Peculier spat "My mind was sound before you came into it!"

"Do you really think those heroes of yours are really trying to help you?"

"I do!" Peculier said proudly. "They would never murder innocent people!" John smiled again. "I think it's time you saw what they've been getting up to my son."

"I said don't call me that! I'm not your son!" Peculier bellowed as he moved towards John shaking with anger.

"Careful now…" John hissed raising his right hand as he had done earlier. "You don't want to overexert yourself my son…" Peculier stumbled, he felt like he had been hit over the head with a heavy object.

"You won't…I won't let you... you're lying…" Peculier managed to say before he collapsed to the floor, unconscious. John sighed putting his hands down. Slowly the Reverend bent over the old man and gently checked Peculier's pulse. Having confirmed Peculier was alive John snapped his right hand and Peculier started to float behind him. With that, the Reverend walked out the door into the night his business at the house completed.

"You'll see my son…this is for your own good. I am only…trying to protect you…" John murmured and with that the Reverend and the immobilized form of old Peculier disappeared into the rain and wind.

The clouds lay low over Mistral as dawn came over the city. The people of the city however were still in their beds or lying on the streets in some form of slumber as the day had just begun. The city was slowly illuminated, block by block by the rising sun in the east, as it drove away the night from every crevasse of the city and every block of the Sky-temples and airships. It was a new day in Mistral City, the center of this side of the world and the beginning point of the journey for the four companions, however only three had made it there.

Honeydew awoke slowly, like all Dwarves he hated early mornings and awoke with great reluctance. He had fallen asleep fully clothed on the uncomfortable wool bed, his companions Peculier and Lysander beside him.

"Ooof!" he grunted shifting to the bedside blinking slowly, reaching to scratch his back. Light glared through an open window and a bird could be heard chirruping in the morning. Honeydew stood slowly leaning on the double chest nearest the bed yawning widely.

"Oooaaaahwn!" Honeydew stretched taking in his surroundings briefly. The place was a one room apartment in the attic of the Skylord's Elysium, it was oddly Dwarf sized as was clear by the sleeping arrangements. Lysander had laid out a neat leather 'bed' but no matter what he did there wasn't enough room to keep Peculier's feet off any part of his body. Honeydew chuckled at the scene, he had gotten the bed!

"Good morning Honeydew." a voice mumbled.

"Who?" the Dwarf asked incredulously blinking into the sunlight as an abrupt shifting and muffled crash followed the voice. "Oi! Steady on!"

"Next time – it's premium bedrooms at Skylord chambers." Lysander muttered appearing out of the entanglement of leather and bedclothes, standing up he rested against a bed-pole sighing with relief as he surveyed the mess all over the floor.

"Good morning Lysander." Honeydew grinned. "Have a nice rest?" Lysander glared at the Dwarf before responding.

"No! No I did not." He said huffily. "The spaceman isn't here?" Lysander asked as he scanned the room. _Oh right Xephos_ Honeydew thought, to think he'd nearly forgotten about the spaceman, _for dreams about Jaffa cakes_!

"We'll have to find him." Honeydew said simply.

Lysander grumbled in assent, hitching his gear and – taking great care to step over the still slumbering Peculier cracked open the door to the lower part of the house muttering something about 'fresh air'. Honeydew sat on the chest still in the process of waking up as he watched the slumbering Peculier drowsily, recounting the events leading up to their morning arrival at Mistral.

It seemed impossible now that Xephos had been lost near the icy bridge. _Or is that where we lost him?_ The Dwarf was troubled, in part because they didn't – couldn't stop and look for the spaceman because it was night-time and the monsters were a threat if they didn't hurry. _Is he alright?_ The endless questions circled in Honeydew's brain as he gazed out the window at the city wondering if his friend had finally made it. The two had been through a great deal together especially the terrible events of Terrorvale and it was likely that the spaceman had made it through the night. _Maybe he's in the city already!_ The Dwarf's heart lightened considerably at the thought, there would be time to go and look for the spaceman, after breakfast.

Old Peculier was still asleep, he had fallen in a pile of soft wool the minute the company had tucked in and was by the look of it having an uncomfortable sleep as he was tussling in the wool and moaning.

"Daisy…Daisy…" the old man mumbled rolling dangerously on the edge of the wool-bed. Honeydew stumbled over, he'd better wake the old man up before he did himself an injury

"Old Peculier? The Dwarf shook the old man gently repeating his name to bring him out of his dream.

"OLD PECULIER!" Honeydew bellowed. Peculier awoke with a start nearly falling off the wool bed, the Dwarf grinned at him. "Alright old man?"

"Oh- you! Y-y-you woke me too early…" the old man muttered reproachfully, Honeydew shrugged.

"You were having a terrible dream old man." Honeydew said sitting on the bed briefly putting on his boots for breakfast. The old man shuddered,"I know what you mean Dwarf. It was terrible…I saw her again…" he trailed off looking down at the floor momentarily.

"I- I'm not feeling well…Honeydew." The old man sighed then shuddered again. Honeydew turned quickly to the old man knocking aside an empty bottle of shaving cream, the memory of Peculier's stroke at the cave was all too familiar. The dwarf looked closely at the old man who was now sagging on the wool, he looked weakly at Honeydew his face gaunt and pale, far different from the almost lifelike look he had attained onboard the Celeano.

"I won't last long, I must see the house of my father's Honeydew!" the old man cried a wild look in his eyes. Honeydew nodded in mute agreement, _Skylord Lysander should go with him_ the dwarf thought he needs help.

Sensing the old man's liability Honeydew rushed from the attic as fast as a Dwarf could making a huge ruckus as he crashed down the stairs to where Lysander was dining. Old Peculier was feeling terrible and badly needed medicine in addition to his desire to see his father's house.

"Skylord – Lysander, Old Peculier…he's ill – he needs help! I think he's about to have another attack!" Honeydew said panting slightly to a bewildered Skylord. Suddenly the Skylord's face became immediately concerned as he too recalled the post-crash stroke.

"Is he still upstairs lad?" the Skylord asked urgently. Honeydew nodded breathlessly. Quickly the Skylord immediately dropped his soup spoon and dashed upstairs, the Dwarf following him closely.

Their old companion was out cold on the mattress his breathing labored and in gasps, he was moaning.

"Peculier?" the Skylord asked tentatively, the old man moaned in response. Slowly the Skylord and the Dwarf neared the bed where the old man was now fairly comatose. "He's not having another attack…thank Notch." Lysander said calmly. "Honeydew, you must get help from downstairs. He must be transported to the care of the wizard Fumblemore he is the only one who can help him." The Skylord commanded as he tried to rouse Peculier.

"Don't you have another one of those magical potions…to make him alright?" the Dwarf asked concernedly remembering the last time when the Skylord had saved the old man near the destroyed cave. The Skylord sighed impatiently

"I'm afraid that was only a temporary measure, it was to get him here so he could get more permanent treatment!"

"What's wrong…with him then?" Honeydew asked confused and alarmed at the old man's groans.

"He is stricken with taint. I've seen it before..." Lysander trailed off as Peculier finally fell silent on the covers. "We must go; he will be well…for a while."

"What's taint?" the Dwarf asked incredulously.

"Taint…" the Skylord began, "is a disease which will eventually overcome him if nothing is done about it. It spreads so I hear from the tainted sands from where Israphel came, which was why in older times adventurers rarely made it back from the desert and the ones that did the most skilled healers could not save."

"Gods! Can he be saved? I'll stay up all night to make sure he's alright." Honeydew said firmly. The Skylord laughed grimly.

"You didn't hear me earlier hero? I'm afraid Fumblemore has the only power to heal him, but we must hurry if we are to save old Peculier!"

"Er, Fumblemore who?"

"The wizard of Mistral hero."

"Erm, should we really take him to a wizard named Fumblemore?" Honeydew asked uncertainly.

"It is the only choice hero!" The Skylord said as he pulled on his cloak from the dresser and headed downstairs with Honeydew reluctantly in tow, _maybe Xephos'll arrive on the way_ Honeydew thought hopefully as the door closed, _but for now we've got to find Fumblemore!_

"EWLING!" Lysander bellowed, racing down the staircase.

"Sir?" the butler's concerned voice replied.

"Send for the healer Eli…" Lysander panted speaking rapidly "tell him to come immediately, no time to wait; I don't care if he hasn't got the time this is urgent! Also," Lysander paused handing a pouch of pink vials to Ewling "while you're waiting, give Peculier one of these every hour on the hour."

"Certainly sir." Ewling said taking the pouch of vials in hand. The butler's expression was remarkably calm and placid despite Lysander's obvious panic, Honeydew was beginning to wonder if something was wrong with the butler too before he walked briskly past Lysander and up the staircase to the main bedroom.

"Come hero! Breakfast will have to wait. There is no time to waste!" _Yeah, breakfast will have to wait…this is serious!_ Honeydew thought as he and Lysander bounded out the doorway to find the only man who could save their companion.


	4. A Requiem for Ingredients

**SoI Chapter 4: A Requiem for Ingredients**

 **A/N: At the moment we are about 5 episodes into the Shadow of Israphel.**

 **As of 1/2/2016 this chapter has been has been edited for all sorts of grammatical errors.**

As daylight dawned upon Mistral City and the surrounding woodland, two figures, loaded with packs; one light and the other extremely bulky emerged from the woods to the gates. Xephos and his companion and neighbor, Martin had been traveling for nearly two days to reach the fabled city and they were there at long last!

"Hello! Who goes there?" a rough voice called out from behind the gate, it was a guard.

"Two travelers, we have been through a long journey and seek refuge at Mistral City." Martin said speaking for the pair. The guard looked at the two of them incredulously.

"At this hour?"

"We got lost. The road was treacherous and dark." Xephos explained. _And that's the half of it either…_ he thought.

The guard nodded in understanding. "Aye, you're right about one thing spaceman, it tis dark. Very well, I don't know how you two got that lost such a short trip… Crowley!" the guard yelled out an order and seconds later the gates began to creak open.

"You don't know? Why don't you try navigating that bloody road sometime?" Martin scowled. Fortunately the guard appeared to have not heard this callous remark.

"Thanks!" Xephos called.

The two walked through the gates as the city interior appeared before their eyes. The road from the exterior was largely of clay and dirt and disappeared into the messy interior of Mistral. As they journeyed further into the city the seedy shops and the ragged peoples near the walls began to dissipate and the buildings and denizens took on a far less impoverished look.

Martin gestured grandly at the surrounding city, "Welcome to Mistral City hero!"

There were shops all over the place, some of which had billboards for advertisements for everything from gout to shady escort services. One of the billboards in particular sported a huge picture of a hand-drawn cat with the subheading

Miss Miggles has lost her cat. REWARD OFFERED

Xephos looked around and wondered how on earth they would find the other three companions amongst the throng crowding the streets of Mistral and the marketplace where they were. There were twenty people all enduring various states of poverty, crowded around a jewelry shop but they were kept back as Martin noticed by a immense bearded guard with a wicked looking stick. As the companions walked further through the main road of the city Xephos began to fully appreciate the power and population of the city. Mistral was indeed as Martin as said, a massive metropolis and the epicenter of trade for most of this side of the world.

Martin gestured to a dirty looking building with a bowed in roof, "There's Bode the Barman's pub. And that's dear Granny Bacon's bakery' across the street. Bless her, wonderful woman." Martin continued and at one point he pointed out a grand looking stone building with a giant golden apple engraved in the entryway, "And that, is the Church of the Holy Apple. Named for St. Aubrey Appleton who hosted the first Mistral City Veggie Fest, it's held every year."

 _Veggie_ Fest? Xephos made a mental note to take a look at the church after he was healed and they re-united with the rest of the fellowship. Pausing in the middle of the crowd the Xephos glanced up at the sky, which was crowded with blimps and airships some many times the size of the _Celeno_. Xephos wondered briefly if the other companions were up there but he discarded the thought as Lysander's ship had been blown up earlier and there wouldn't be any reason for them to be on a different one yet. Sky bridges connected each building to the other and near the far end on a particularly long land bridge was a cone shaper tower, which at this moment was emitting an odd reddish glow from its lower windows.

"What tower is that?" Xephos asked pointing upwards to the glowing structure. Martin casually looked at the odd shaped sky-building.

"Oh, that's probably Fumblemore's…" Martin started before a loud explosion ripped through the air drowning out him at once. The two and the surrounding crowd gazed up at the sky for several moments, but when nothing shattered or further exploded the daily chatter resumed in square. The tower was mostly intact save for a few chunks, while the sky-bridge connecting to it was blown to bits and wood chips littered the roofs of several nearby houses. Xephos watched as a man with a long white beard in dark robes appeared, glanced briefly at what he had done and disappeared back inside the tower.

Martin stared at the scene for a moment before turning back to Xephos, "Okay that is _definitely_ Fumblemore's tower."

"Did he just try to blow up his own tower?" Xephos asked in disbelief.

"Yep. He's been trying for ages." Martin said.

"Oh, um alright then." Xephos laughed "And you're taking me to _him_?"

"Yeah."

Xephos looked at him skeptically, "Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"Yeeah. Trust me hero, I'd like to take you anywhere else but Fumblemore's the only one who knows a decent bit of magic in this place. It's just such a pity that he's completely senile."

"So he's a crazy wizard. That's just great!"

"Oh yeah. A little crazy. Okay, maybe more than a little." Martin said alluding to the previous explosion. "As you've probably noticed."

Xephos sighed, "I can see that. He's not going to blow me up too is he? He seems a bit dangerous."

"Nah, except one time he transformed the city baker into a chicken…and don't worry about him, I hear the baker lives on a nice farm now. No, normally Fumblemore's usually not a danger to anyone but himself."

"Thanks! That's uh _really_ comforting." Xephos said looking back at the damaged tower.

"Even so, he'll be able to help you out, with simple matters he's skilled enough from what I hear." Martin trailed off. "But when it comes to blowing up random objects Fumblemore is _definitely_ your man."

"Okay let me get this straight," Xephos said "the person who's healing my cut is the same guy that just TNT'ed his own place."

"For the third time, yes." Martin replied.

"Flawless. Alright, how do we get up to his tower?" Xephos asked as he did not see a ladder or anything to reach the myriad sky-city above them.

"Oh yeah that'd be through the SkyTower, it's a couple streets north and then a little ways from there. See?" Martin gestured towards the center of the city several towers, one with several winding bridges leading to the sky-city. Lysander and the others were probably already there, _if that's where the Skylords live,_ Xephos thought. Xephos checked the bloodstained woolen bandage on his right arm; it was bleeding much to his chagrin. He scowled and covered it again with Lysander's traveling cloak.

"How soon can we reach Fumblemore? I really don't want to be bleeding for much longer."

"If you did I'd think you were as crazy as Fumblemore." Martin jeered, "We can reach the Sky-Tower fairly soon by my measure. Anyways, its rotten luck that your Skylord friend isn't here your passage would have been easy enough. The Sky-Tower will be guarded at many points you know to keep out the 'rabble' – like myself - so if we hurry we might be able to sneak up unnoticed." Xephos looked at him quizzically,

"Okay but what do we need to sneak in there for?"

"Because the guards won't let anyone in who isn't a public official or a Skylord and we are neither of those things." Martin explained "Anyway we've got to get a move on otherwise we'll never get there!" and with a little jingle of his wares as he started off through the bustling crowd for the massive cobblestone Sky-Tower ahead. Xephos sighed in irritation and in Martin's wake taking great care to bump into as few passerby's as possible as to avoid a scene in the busy square.

The crowd proved to be increasingly difficult to navigate alone as Xephos had never been in a city before and he frequently fell far behind Martin. Nevertheless, he was able to control his sense of direction by the unmistakable sight of Martin's immense pack bobbing up and down among the crowd. While stopping to glance over the crowd for a sign of Martin Xephos narrowly avoided bumping into a small hook-nosed man who was carrying several books. The man cursed stumbled and angrily almost dropping the books as he jostled with the crowd,

"Watch where you're goin' you damned fool!"

"Sorry!" Xephos apologized but the harried little man had already disappeared into the crowd at this point. He sighed and carried on glancing briefly but more carefully for any sign of his urban companion. It was some time before the spaceman spotted Martin's large pack bobbing up in the crowd a whole street away! Xephos swore silently, _I'm not used to city life at all_ he thought, _more of the country type really_. Quickly he jostled and pushed his way through the crowd ignoring the cries of protest and curses that followed him in an effort to catch up with his companion.

 _Is it always this busy?_ Xephos wondered for the thousandth time, but mercifully the crowd soon began to thin as they neared the massive towers by the grove in the center of the city. At this point Xephos had caught up with Martin as he pushed himself through a small group of unappreciative well-dressed citizens.

"Hey long time no see hero, I'd wondered where you'd gone off too." Martin smiled cheerfully.

"Why are there so many people here?" Xephos asked as he paused to catch his breath.

"It's market day."

"Market day? Really? What day is it anyway?"

"Thursday." Martin answered.

"Oh no…" Xephos groaned _when does anything good_ _ **ever**_ _happen on a Thursday?_

"What's up? Did you forget something? Believe me if you left it back in the crowd it's already gone mate." Martin said.

"No, I just I don't like Thursdays very much."

"Yeah they're a rotten day aren't they?" Martin agreed, "I wake up thinking it's a Friday and almost the weekend but _no_ , there's still one more stupid day to go!"

Luckily, the crowd had thinned out enough for him and Martin to reach the edge of the marketplace and the main villages and roads of the city. At long last the two reached the grove of oak trees nearest to the SkyTower and the center of the city. The SkyTower was an immense cobblestone building which gave an impression of power and grandness. It made the spaceman feel tiny just to look upon the place, as it was taller than any of the trees near the old cave. The area around the SkyTower was cleaner than the dusty and sometimes absolutely filthy areas of outer Mistral as trimmed flowers bloomed in garden beds which encircled the perimeter of the tower walls.

"It's massive!" Xephos exclaimed.

"Aye hero it was built by some legendary architect four or five hundred years ago but that's not really important anyways." Martin explained as the two drew near to the SkyTower. "Quick, take my cloak and pull it over your bandage, before the high society types, let alone the guard see you." Xephos shot him a quizzical look.

"The guards are very intrusive you know. Although, on second thoughts… that might not be such a good idea." Martin said looking distastefully at the brown cloak he was about to give to him. "Besides you've already got one don't you?"

Xephos gave a tug at Lysander's traveling cloak "Yeah, I'll hang on to this one thanks."

The two soon came upon the tower's front entrance; it was low and thick, a single guard in a blue and green tunic stood to one side of the gate, he had a scabbard with an iron blade by his side.

"Who approaches the SkyTower?" the guard barked.

"Friends of Skylord Lysander!"

"And why, pray tell, would a noble Skylord be associated with…travelers like yourselves?" the guard sneered standing in front of the door.

"He is my friend and companion!" Xephos explained.

The guard snorted at this, "A likely story."

"Look, that's not the point, we wish to speak with Fumblemore, we need his help!" Xephos said.

"You need _Fumblemore's_ help?"

"Yeah!"

"Sorry. I can't let you in. The rules specifically state that no one who is not a public official, a Skylord, or a member of Mayor Underhill's Guards may enter the Sky-Tower without special appointment-"

"Yes we know the stupid rules." Martin rolled his eyes, "What we're trying to tell you is that we have an appointment with Fumblemore! That good enough for you?"

"You do?" The guard asked, eyes narrowing.

"We really do need his help. Seriously!" Xephos reiterated.

"Really? Are you sure about that?"

"Yes. We only wish to meet with him as I'm hurt and I need healing!" Xephos exclaimed, pulling up Lysander's cloak showing the guard his bloodstained sleeve.

The guard glanced at Xephos and gave a slight nod, "Alright, if you're in a hurry to get blown up… but you'll have to leave your weapons at the gate. Oh and I'll need to see a visitors certificate." he said eyeing Xephos' carefully wrapped diamond blade. _A visitor's certificate?_ Xephos wondered. _Where can we get one of those?_

At this moment Martin dropped his pack and stepped forward his hand on his sword handle, the guard held his place and gazed at him expectantly. "Yeah about that… it's not gonna happen."

"Oh really?" the guard growled and reached for his sword "Then I'll have to-" before he could finish speaking Martin smashed his fist into the man's temple. The guard was down before he had a chance to fully grasp the pommel of his sword.

"What a jerk." Martin sneered as he dropped his pack and began to pull the guard behind a nearby tree.

Xephos laughed, "He did seem a little bit touchy didn't he?"

"He's always like that." Martin replied once he had sufficiently hid the unconscious guard from sight. "Anyway we were fortunate the gate is shaded from passerby's or we'd already be before Mayor Underhill explaining ourselves."

Martin threw off his enormous pack and took a moment to stuff the dirty cloak in it.

"Shouldn't we leave extra items from our packs? If it's a long way to the top we'll take forever, or at least you will." Xephos suggested, "They are pretty heavy, especially yours."

"Yeah don't remind me." Martin grimaced, "You have a good point though. We can leave them in a storage closet, near the entrance no one goes there as far as I know. Just don't leave anything personal, you wouldn't want any of that to fall into the wrong hands right?"

"I've just got loads of crap and stuff in here for the most part." Xephos said glad to be temporarily relieved of some of his ridiculous load. Once they had taken the key from the unconscious guard, the pair entered the SkyTower and dumped their rubbish in a storage closet and continued inside. After making their way up the winding stairwell, the pair finally reached the top of the tower and briefly paused to catch their breath.

"What do you think hero? Pretty nice view huh?" Martin smiled.

Xephos could not have agreed more, the sky was his home in a sense and the upper city of Mistral was no exception to it.

"Yeah you can see everything from up here" he said in an awed voice. In fact, in the far distance, Xephos could see the distant outline of the sea, the appearance of which caused a brief but powerful sense of nostalgia of the Yogcave and what life had once been. To the right, Xephos could see the lighthouse tower, and as he peered further down the bridge he glimpsed a very oddly shaped and familiar tower.

"That's Fumblemore's tower isn't it?" Xephos gestured with his good arm at the strangely shaped tower.

Martin nodded, "Yep. The one and only."

"Alright… let's get this over with." Xephos sighed. It seemed that it was a good time to go as most of the bridges were clear of any guards or other obstacles.

"Yeah, so long as Fumblemore doesn't blow up the bridge again I think we can make it!" Martin agreed, and with that the two companions took off at a brisk pace for the wizard's tower.

…

"Dwarf I have signed two temporary Skylord licenses for you and your friend." Lysander said as he handed an official looking piece of paper with his signature scrawled at the bottom to Honeydew.

 _I, Skylord Wilhelm Lysander hereby grant Honeydew the Dwarf a temporary Skylord license for the duration of his stay at Mistral._

"Thanks. Sooo I'm a Dwarf Skylord now?"

Lysander nodded, "Indeed you are hero. You are now Honeydew the bold!"

Honeydew smiled and tucked the license in his pocket next to where he kept his pickaxe, "I was always Honeydew the bold Lysander. I was _born_ bold!"

"I wouldn't doubt it hero. Nevertheless, it is important that you keep it close dwarf, as it is your passport to the upper city! Unfortunately what I'm doing is very illegal so _please_ don't tell _anyone_ about your license or the real reason for this!" Lysander explained, putting a special emphasis on anyone.

"Uh-huh. Because no one will suspect anything about a dwarf Skylord right?" Honeydew snorted. "I bet I don't look suspicious at _all_."

"You know what I mean hero." Lysander said dismissively.

"Yeah, yeah."

Currently the two companions were at a Sky-Tower checkpoint, which led all to Mistral's upper city.

"This is taking a bit longer than usual…" Lysander aired to no one in particular.

"Skylord Lysander?" a gruff voice asked from inside.

"Bob? Is that you Bob?"

"What! Lysander iz that 'o?"

"Yes, it's me Bob. Can we go in?" Lysander asked as a bearded and extremely tired face appeared from behind the door.

"Ah-bloody 'ell why the early call Skylord? And 'o are you?" Bob asked, staring at Honeydew.

At this inquiry Lysander made a grand gesture to Honeydew, "He is Jankle, a dwarven friend from Icaria." It took all of Honeydew's strength to suppress a snicker, _Jankle?_ What a name!

"'E doesn't look like a Skylord to me, not wearin' the uniform is 'e? Never rightly seen a Dwarf Skylord b'fore..." Bob mused scratching his beard. "Have 'o got a license?"

Honeydew sighed and pulled out his license bearing Lysander's signature and showed it to him. Bob raised his eyebrows at this and stared at the license for a full minute.

"Well? Can we go in please?" Honeydew asked impatiently.

Bob nodded slowly in assent, "Burn me… a dwarf Skylord? Well jus' proves anythin' is possible eh? Ha! Ha, ha, ha! Aye, everything seems to be in o'der 'ere, yeh can go. Good to see yeh Skylords." the door swung open leading to the entrance of the Sky-Tower. Lysander led the way brusquely hurrying up the winding dark staircase leading to the top of Mistral, Honeydew trailed behind him, panting under the quick pace Lysander had set.

"Hurry hero!" Lysander called down to him as he reached the top of the landing; a few seconds later Honeydew joined him at the top, panting heavily.

"Are you well dwarf?" Lysander asked, finally taking notice of Honeydew's panting.

"I'm fine Lysander! Just give me a second!" Honeydew coughed and brushed a bit of spittle from his beard nonchalantly. "There we go! See? I'm… I'm fine! We dwarves are natural sprinters! Didn't you know that?"

Lysander smiled, "Of course you are. Ready for the off then? Or would you like me to wait for a little longer?"

"Yeah I need a minute. Just to collect my thoughts. Not that I'm tired or anything!" Honeydew muttered, "Whew…"

"You ought to appreciate the view hero; only the most privileged experience the top of Mistral." Lysander said pompously as he gazed out at the Skyline.

Honeydew rolled his eyes at this, "Yeah great. I can see the pretty sky. That makes me _really_ privileged doesn't it?"

"Indeed you are." Lysander demurred.

Mistral's upper city was connected by floating bridges everywhere. Some led to mounted airships, one of which was called the _Funship_ – which was Jasper's according to Lysander - and other bridges led to various buildings, including gigantic floating dirt pyramid with water floating out of it into the city pool, and a lighthouse.

"Are you ready to go on?" Lysander asked.

Honeydew glowered at him as if Lysander had challenged him to a race, "Of course I'm ready!" he said indignantly. "I've been waiting for you to stop going on about the scenery for the past five minutes!"

"It is wise to be mindful of your surroundings hero. Anyway, let us tarry no longer! The wizard awaits." Lysander said moving forward along the thin bridge towards where Fumblemore's tower was floating in the clouds. Honeydew reluctantly followed him, treading carefully along the bridge's side to avoid falling to his death. _There's no bleepin' handrails! Damn it, why is it so dangerous?_ He thought nervously.

"Watch your step hero." Lysander cautioned as the clouds began to roll in. Thankfully the two had reached the bridge leading directly to the wizard tower, which seemed to have been more carefully developed with fence-posts mounted to either side of it.

"Of course I'm watching my step! Not that it would do a whole lot of good with no bloody safety precautions up here!" Honeydew yelled, doing his very best not to look beneath him. _Don't look down, don't look down, don't look down…agh! I'm looking down!_ Honeydew thought, nearly panicking as he tore his head back upwards. _You're okay…you didn't fall! Okay… okay... gods this doesn't feel safe at all!_

"Dwarf? Hero!" Lysander's deep voice called, bringing him out of his coma.

"Y-yeah? What's going on Lysander? Something wrong?" Honeydew asked, as he rubbed the back of his neck casually. _Nothing's gone wrong… you're safe and sound. Safe and sound._ he reminded himself.

"We have to forge ahead Honeydew, and don't worry the bridges are perfectly stable!" Lysander said calmly before turning and continuing along to the end of the bridge.

"R-right- the bridges are stable, the bridges are stable – sure I can work with that…" Honeydew said, taking in a deep breath before continuing towards Lysander. "The bridges are stable…the bloody bridges are stable…Oh gods!" Honeydew yelled as an unseen cloudbank rammed him in the face like a great white fist causing the bridge to creak dangerously.

"NOPE! This isn't stable! Oh gods, oh gods, ohhh gods get me out of here!" Honeydew yelped as the bridge gave another lurch. "Shit! Lysander! Oooooh! THIS ISN'T SAFE AT ALL!"

The cloudbank obscured Honeydew's field of vision completely; it was as if there was no longer any world outside of the endless bank of white.

"Damn it!"Honeydew swore as he cautiously felt his way along the remainder of the bridge. After a few minutes the clouds evaporated and the sun shone fully on Honeydew's back. Lysander was standing right in front of him as the sun cleared Honeydew nearly bumped into him as he attempted to regain his senses.

"Oh thank gods it's you Lysander. I never thought I'd be glad to see you… oh gods and Jebus, t-that was horrible…" Honeydew stammered. Lysander, however, did not respond. "Um Lysander? Are you there?" he asked, reaching up and tapping him on the shoulder.

"FUMBLEMOOORE!" Lysander slammed his sword on the bridge.

Honeydew jumped back and raised his arms in a defensive posture. "Oi! I didn't do anything!"

Apparently Lysander had neither heard, nor noticed Honeydew's presence yet as he continued with his tirade, "YOU DAMNED FOOL!" he bellowed.

"Uh…" Honeydew started, before he realized what Lysander was angered about. Sometime before they had arrived the entirety of the bridge leading to Fumblemore's tower had been destroyed, leaving a thirty meter drop to the city below.

"He must have blown it up in one of his confounded experiments!" Lysander fumed. "That old fool. Well hero, can you fix it? I have few materials and we must get across before the clouds come back otherwise we may be waiting quite some time before it clears up." He said, gesturing to a very thick cloudbank that was steadily approaching their position on the bridge.

"Can I fix it? Come on Lysander is that a question? I'm a Dwarf! Of course I can fix it. Look, I've got some extra stone here, that should be easily enough to build a bridge to the other side." Honeydew replied as he reached into his pack and fetched a dozen stone bricks from inside.

"You carry that much stone with you?" Lysander asked doubtfully.

"I'm a Dwarf! This is what we do!" Honeydew exclaimed, "What did you think I was carrying? Twenty kilos of tissues or something?"

"Never mind I forgot myself hero. But please, hurry for we may never make it across lest this weather clears up." Lysander fretted.

Honeydew worked quickly, placing stone chunks carefully on where the rest of the bridge used to be. Mercifully, neither the stones nor Honeydew plummeted to the ground as the repaired bridge held, suspended by some invisible force in midair. Within fifteen minutes Honeydew had completed his task just as the first wisps of the cloud bank rolled in.

"Whew…" Honeydew panted, "All done!"

"Thank you hero!"

"Yeah no problem. But please never ask me to do that again."

"Of course hero. Of course." Lysander beamed as they crossed the surrogate bridge into the uninviting interior of Fumblemore's tower.

"Fumblemore?" Lysander called as they crossed into the entryway of the wizard tower.

"Old wizard?!" Honeydew yelled, but there was no response as his rough voice ricocheted around the tower's interior. The tower was very large and spacious, the wind whistled around outside the windows and around under the glass floor of it. The tower's interior seemed to be full of bookshelves on which were stacked many books of sorcery. Lysander and Honeydew were at the bottom of the tower near two staircases which lead upwards to different parts of the tower. The closest staircase led to the outside of the tower and the other went to the right into a cloudbank that was obscuring part of the tower interior.

"Fumblemore?"

Once again there was no response to their inquiry.

Lysander motioned to the nearest staircase, "He must be in his office…at the very top. Come along hero!"

…

"Hmm… I don't think we went quite the right way about this." Xephos said.

Currently he and Martin were standing in Fumblemore's vacant office. Fumblemore's office was medium sized and held many books, trinkets, cauldrons, and potions among other curiosities. The place also furnished a high glass ceiling and a deep blue and black carpet on the stone floor, like a proper wizard's office would in Xephos' opinion.

"No maybe we should have taken the over way around." Martin agreed.

The pair had been climbing around the tower for forty minutes trying to find Fumblemore, and although they hadn't found him the two had heard a lot of surreptitious noises that suggested his presence.

"Right, there was another staircase wasn't there?" Xephos recalled. "Do you know what it leads too?"

Martin shook his head "I dunno. The tower keeps changing so I'd wager that even Fumblemore doesn't know where his office is else he'd be here by now!"

Xephos sighed; it was true the tower's physics were exceedingly difficult to negotiate. "We might as well try the other way then..." he muttered.

"Yeah well, we kind of have too since it's the only other way to go and this one's obviously wrong."

"Right, right… let's be careful though." Xephos said glancing to his left at the pathway outside. As had been proven all too clearly earlier, the staircases were not furnished with basic safety measures.

Martin laughed "Sure hero, you can lead the way then."

"Gee, thanks! Good to know you've got that much confidence in me." Xephos said sarcastically.

"You are the hero. I bet you do this sort of stuff every day."

"Um, no not really."

"I was joking!" Martin exclaimed.

Xephos stepped forward out into the cool morning breeze and glanced down at the bustling city below. _Gods I wonder how high up we are.. we have to be at least fifty blocks above everything else!_ Xephos thought gazing in mild awe at the incredible view from outside the tower. Quickly he broke out of his momentary pause and began a slow descent down the tower steps on the outside, with Martin following close behind.

"Aaaah! I feel like I'm going to fall off this thing!" Martin yelled.

"Don't remind me." Xephos scowled, "Look, we're going to be fine!"

"Is that a promise?"

"Don't worry about it! There's nothing to worry about!" Xephos yelled.

"I'm trusting you on this!" Martin said, swearing loudly as he nearly slipped on one of the steps. "Freaking hell!"

Slowly but surely the pair reached the bottom of the steps into the lower entryway of the Fumblemore's tower off of the precarious staircase outside.

"See? I told you there's nothing to worry about." Xephos smiled.

"Sure, I bet there's nothing to worry about now that we're not a couple millimeters away from death! You know, I _swear_ that staircase really was inside at one time. I have no bloody clue why it was moved outside. _No_ bloody clue at all!" Martin shook his head in exasperation, "Okay, we're going to the right staircase then hero? As opposed to the wrong one that is."

Xephos shook his head, "You're getting as bad as Honeydew. Alright let's go." he said drawing his cloak around him tightly as he climbed up staircase into the next section of the tower.

…

Lysander and Honeydew had finally found Fumblemore. After many minutes of searching they had found him in the side room of the tower, which the right side staircase had led too. The wizard's presence was further confirmed by the loud farting noises that had been coming from the room, as it was, apparently a bathroom. At the moment, the pair were sitting uncomfortably in some chintz chairs outside the bathroom door, doing their very best not to inhale the smells coming from inside it. For his part, Honeydew was holding his hand over his nose to shield himself from the smell; while Lysander occasionally got up and took a few deep breaths by the entrance before returning to his seat.

"This is horrible Lysander. Completely horrible. How long is he going to sit on the toilet?!" Honeydew cried. "I'm sick of waiting for him to finish up in there!"

"Hopefully not much longer." Lysander said.

"He's been on there for thirty freaking minutes already!"

"I know but we just don't have much choice but to wait hero."

Honeydew glared at Lysander and curled his fists in irritation. "Balls to it. I'm tired of this shit" He said, as he marched over and knocked on it several times.

"Hero!" Lysander exclaimed, "This is a wizard's office!"

"Fumblemore? Hey Fumblemore! Uh, are you doing okay in there?"

There was a pause before a nasally voice called from the bathroom, "Eh? Who are you? Give me a moment, I'm on the toilet!"

"We know! Just um I was wondering… if you need any paper? Or something?" Honeydew asked awkwardly.

"Yes actually, could you pass me one of those books? On the right shelf by Fabulo the Great, that's all they're good for."

"Fabulo the What? Sorry? What was that?" Honeydew replied. There was no response except for another loud ripping sound from inside the water closet.

"Shit!" Honeydew exclaimed, backing away from the bathroom door and covering his face with both hands.

"What is that smell?" Lysander coughed.

"It's another one of Fumblemore's Magic Farts." Honeydew groaned "And amazingly enough they smell worse than the real ones!"

"Er…" Lysander said, covering his face with his handkerchief, "Well we might as well wait a little longer. He _seems_ to have the situation under control."

"Yeah if you consider utter chaos to be having things 'under control'." Honeydew snorted

"Lysander! Simon!" a familiar voice cried from nearby.

Lysander jumped up in surprise banging his head on the side of a particularly low hanging bookshelf in the process. "What the devil? Hero?!"

"Oh. My. Gods. Lewis! You're back!" Honeydew exclaimed in disbelief as Xephos and Martin entered the room from another perilous journey on the tower staircases.

Martin dumped his hefty pack on the floor, "Yeah he's back…those staircases were murder by the way."

"Hello Simon." Xephos grinned as he stepped forward to embrace his friend.

"No- I mean, stop!" Honeydew said waving him off. Xephos shot him a quizzical look, as Honeydew sniffed the air for a moment before beckoning him forward.

"What was that about?"

"The air smelt really bad earlier." Honeydew explained.

"Oh what for?" Xephos asked.

"Because Fumblemore's been stinking it up in here for the past half hour." Martin laughed at this.

"I'm glad we didn't arrive here earlier then!"

"Yeah true – Wait; hold on, who are you?" Honeydew asked, staring him. Martin glanced at him disdainfully,

"Tbh, I could say the same for you, random."

"I am Honeydew." He said importantly.

"Well met, I'm Martin." Martin replied, offering a hand, which Honeydew shook.

"And I am Skylord Lysander." Lysander said as he strode forward and offered his hand to Martin as well.

"I am Martin, bowman, peddler, and counselor at large."

"Indeed, well met Martin." Lysander said as he looked at the group "Well, this is a happy occasion!"

"You could say that again." Xephos added.

"Yeah… so you're a ruddy Skylord huh?" Martin smiled "You must be the one Xeph keeps talking about."

Lysander raised his eyebrows at this, "Is that so? I am flattered hero."

Xephos blushed, "Uh – yeah I mentioned you a few times. It's no big deal."

Lysander nodded, "That is well. But where did you disappear too hero? We tried looking for you but we couldn't find you!" he said, with concern evident in his eyes.

"Um… it's a long story." Martin smirked at this,

"He got lost."

"That about sums it up!" Xephos admitted.

"Please hero, tell us everything! I give you my word as a Skylord that no one outside of this room will know what transpired." Lysander said dutifully.

"Yeah we have time…Fumblemore hasn't made much progress in the past thirty minutes!" Honeydew muttered.

"Oh yeah Fumblemore… is he actually on the loo?" Xephos asked. Honeydew sighed,

"Lewis, he's been on the bloody thing forever… for bloody ever."

Xephos laughed, and then began recalling all the events that had transpired from the moment he had become separated from the fellowship until now in Fumblemore's tower. Xephos took a seat on an uncomfortable stone seat – the wizard's idea of a surrogate armchair - and began his story. He had lost them in the dark and was in a way saved by Martin just shortly afterwards. Xephos had come to know a good deal about the Bowman who had been the pair's unknown neighbor. He and Martin had traveled together for many miles, and had reached the outskirts of Mistral by dawn, a full day behind the rest of the group. Xephos dwelt on his brief travels with Martin for a short period although was forced to mention his cut, which was why he had sought Fumblemore's help and had consequently run into the rest of the fellowship.

"And that's about it!" Xephos finished.

"Wooow." Honeydew whistled "That's amazing Lewis, bloody amazing. Did you really injure yourself on a tree?" Xephos smiled weakly,

"Yeah – it wasn't one of my finer moments…" Honeydew guffawed at this, "Anyway where's the old man? He didn't have another stroke or something did he?"

"I'm afraid he is stricken with taint!" Lysander explained. "Only the wizard can help him."

"Fumblemore… right…" Honeydew mumbled.

"How long have you been waiting for him?" Martin asked.

"Way too long." Honeydew groaned "It's amazingly nerve-racking."

"Are you nearly finished there? We've got a lot of things going on right now – and we need help!" Xephos complained.

"Yeah you mind getting a move on in there? We have things to do!" Honeydew chimed in.

In response a loud bang came from the closet and out from it appeared the wizard. Fumblemore was dressed in a deep blue and black colored wizard's robe with many moons and stars, he had a great gray beard and dark brown eyes, and he twirled a wand in one hand.

"Eh! Who 're you?" he asked waving his wand blindly at the four companions. Judging by the look of utter bewilderment on Fumblemore's face it was obvious that he had not been expecting them.

"Hey! Watch where you're pointing that thing!" Honeydew exclaimed as another loud bang issued from the wizard's wand cracking a nearby mirror. Fumblemore gazed around in confusion as he gathered his surroundings.

"Who are you?" he asked for a second time.

"Um -" Xephos started.

"I am Honeydew, of Khaz Mordan!" Honeydew introduced himself.

"And I'm Xephos, hero of the world."

"Well we're both heroes actually."

"Oh yeah sorry pal. This is Honeydew," Xephos said, gesturing to his friend "hero of something, I can't quite remember what is is…"

"I am the hero of a thousand lovely damsels." Honeydew interjected. "Women, they're attracted by my charisma."

"By you manly deeds you mean." Lysander corrected him.

"Oh yeah that too." Honeydew said absentmindedly. "My manly deeds…"

"I'm Martin, they made me come here." Martin said.

"Yes - we are four companions who have traveled here! We have come to seek your help!" Xephos explained as Fumblemore finally managed to steady himself.

"Four champignons? How lovely, I've always liked mushrooms." The wizard replied, as scratched his charred eyebrows. "I am the great wizard Fumblemore."

"Oh yeah? You're really him huh?" Honeydew said sarcastically, "Wonderful now we don't have to worry about a thing now you're here right?"

"What?" Fumblemore queried.

"Can he hear very well?" Xephos asked uncertainly as the wizard stared at the four companions curiously.

"I don't think he can hero..." Lysander replied.

"Can you hear us?" Xephos asked.

"Excuse me?"

"Can you hear us?!" Xephos repeated himself. Fumblemore put a hand to his ear. Xephos sighed in irritation and repeated himself once more,

"CAN YOU HEAR US?" Fumblemore gave him a quizzical look,

"No, no I don't fear you." He said. Xephos groaned and feel silent.

"I'm guessing that's a no on the hearing…" Honeydew said.

"Old wizard! We have come to seek your help, our friend is sick with taint, and I am hurt! CAN YOU HELP US?" Xephos bellowed, bending closely towards Fumblemore for good measure.

"What can I do for you Xepdos?" Fumblemore asked apparently not hearing anything Xephos had just told him. Xephos swore angrily and tried again.

Fumblemore smiled, "I'm rather partial to Guinness myself."

"Oh for cripes sake… OUR FRIEND IS SICK WITH TAINT!" Honeydew thundered.

"PECULIER IS ILL!" Lysander exclaimed very closely to Fumblemore's ear.

"Don't we have something to write this down on?" Martin asked. "I mean, Fumblemore _can_ read can't he?"

"I wouldn't count on it mate." Honeydew muttered.

"Taint eh? Let me see what I can do for your sister." Fumblemore said turning and picking up a dusty book from the nearest bookshelf. Xephos nearly fell over in relief.

"As for the cut could you find me a knife?" Fumblemore asked blithely, as he started searching through the contents of a nearby chest. Xephos had took of Martin's traveling cloak showing the blood-soaked bandage underneath it but he was tempted to leave the wound be as the last thing he wanted to do was let the wizard - who currently had his beard stuck in a chest lock - have a look at it.

"A knife?! But that will make him worse!" Lysander exclaimed. Fumblemore waved him off and then with a tremendous effort freed his beard from the lock leaving wispy strands of white hair caught in it. Honeydew and Martin just laughed.

"A knave hmm? Yes… cruel fellows indeed." The wizard said. "Ah!"

Fumblemore had finally taken notice ofXephos' wound. "Come here young man." He said, beckoning him forwards.

Xephos stepped forward nervously, fully expecting the worst.

Once he was in range Fumblemore grasped his arm and started prodding the wound with his wand, "Hrm…"

Then with little regard to the look of complete apprehension on Xephos' face he pulled out a bottle of black powder. Carefully he tipped out a bit of the powder and sprinkled it onto Xephos' bloodied cut.

"Ah-!" Xephos winced, as his flesh seemed to knot together into an ugly brown scar on his upper arm. Fumblemore nodded approvingly, and capped the bottle of the mysterious powder, and stuffed it back into his robes.

"Thanks…" he said hardly believing that he was still alive. The rest of the fellowship also breathed a collective sigh of relief as Xephos smiled and waved his healed arm around. The cut in his shirt was still there but all was well aside from that.

"Now we can get rid of this…" Martin said distastefully as he tossed the bloodied bandage out the side of the tower.

"Is that all?" Fumblemore asked.

"No, I'm afraid there is another matter; can you help us with Peculier Fumblemore? He is sick with taint!" Lysander said emphatically. Fumblemore did not respond but instead continued to peruse his book, as if he was completely unaware of the fellowship was even there.

The wizard flipped through several more pages furiously before responding, "Eh, very well I suppose I can cure your sister but she'll need a bit of stuff."

"I think you're finally getting through to him mate." Martin muttered.

"What stuff?" Honeydew asked impatiently as Fumblemore had gone back to staring at his book, humming softly as he did so.

"Mmmm? Sorry what was that?"

"What stuff?!" Honeydew repeated. Fumblemore looked up from his book and frowned at him,

"Could you say that one more time? You'll have to speak up-"

"WHAT STUFF?"

"Stuff?" Fumblemore asked.

"YES! Yes… you crazy old bugger." Honeydew replied.

"Have patience young man I am reading…" Fumblemore said as he went back to his humming. Honeydew scowled and paced back and forth impatiently for several minutes before the wizard spoke up again "Hmm, you'll need to bring me five feathers, and a bit of dirt, yes five dirt will do nicely."

"Here I've got some arrows. You can pluck the feathers off these." Martin said as he gave five arrows from his quiver bundle to Fumblemore who took them and placed them in a dusty cauldron on a nearby shelf.

"Five dirt? How do we measure five dirt? What is one dirt?" Honeydew wondered.

"Maybe he means a block Simon." Xephos suggested.

"Ah, fair point mate, fair point." Honeydew agreed.

"Oh and yes, a bottle of water from the pool of life, five gunpowder, and er… two golden apples."Fumblemore continued, tracing the page with his wand.

"Two golden apples?!" the four exclaimed incredulously. They all knew all too well just how difficult golden apples were to get.

"Correct dears. Give me all that and your auntie will be well." Fumblemore said, closing his spell book. Xephos sighed in frustration at the tall order the wizard had presented _how are we going to get that much gunpowder?_ He thought helplessly.

"You will need to bring all of the ingredients to me in two days or so as I will be traveling to Icaria two days from today – at midnight." Fumblemore coughed.

"RIGHT!" Honeydew bellowed, the wizard flinched taken aback.

"No need to yell- I'm not deaf you know! Now go on sonny, and be good!"

"In a jiffy you nutter... the sooner we get out of this place the better…" Honeydew said quietly as Fumblemore promptly disappeared back inside the water closet. There was an awkward pause as the group heard the distinct sounds of bad colon problems coming from inside it.

"Um -" Xephos started as a loud rumbling came from inside the closet "is he alright?"

"Probably, he's a wizard after all." Martin replied.

"That's the concerning part." Honeydew said "How do we know he's not about to blow this place up in one big fart or something?"

"That is a good point hero." Lysander concurred "It would be in our best interests if we left as soon as possible!"

"What are we going to do about this Golden apple?" Xephos inquired as the group made their way to the exit. This time it was Lysander who answered him.

"I know of only one gold apple in the town heroes, and it is sacred."

"Wasn't the cult of the apples or something? Or a church? It was a church right?"

"Maybe it's a cult of vegetarians." Honeydew surmised "I mean it sounds like something vegetarians would do… they're kind of strange like that."

Lysander rolled his eyes at this "It is the Church of the Holy Apple that we must go too."

"Yeah I showed it to Xeph this morning." Martin added.

 _So do we have to steal a sacred symbol or something? I bet that'll just go over really well…_ Xephos thought with a flash of frustration

Honeydew scratched his beard thoughtfully at this revelation "You know what this is, it's a proper quest Lysander, a proper quest."

"Indeed, it is a quest for heroes!" Lysander agreed.

"Well thank gods we're here."

"Yeah, yeah whatever. Come on! Let's get out of here before Fumblemore blows us all up." Martin said, as he walked out onto the top of the staircase.

"A wise choice Peddler!" Lysander said as the group exited the wizard's tower at last.


	5. Proper Quest

**SoI Chapter 5: Proper Quest!**

 **A/N: To DannyJames- Martin will be playing a very important part in the plot soon :) and thank you so much for the review (I was beginning to think no one would ever review this)!**

 **As of 9/2/2015 this chapter has been edited for grammatical issues. Some funny stuff happens in this one so as always read, review, and enjoy!**

The climb down the winding steps of the staircase of Fumblemore's tower seemed to take an eternity. Xephos was caught between worrying about falling off into the abyss below ad whether or not the tower was going to explode, and at the same time trying to remember exactly what items had told them to get. _Five dirt, five gunpowder, five dirt, five gunpowder_ he mentally repeated Fumblemore's list on the way down. _I wish I had a bit of paper to write this down_ Xephos thought with some irritation.

Fortunately, the regrouped fellowship made it to the bottom of Fumblemore's tower out onto the stone bridge Honeydew had constructed without injury. Lysander mumbled something about how hideous the solid stone looked but the group made a safe crossing to the main part of the bridge.

"Oh hell." Martin said breaking the silence. Xephos turned looking in Martin's direction and then he noticed the source of the problem. Three guards blocked the crossing to the bridge, which led to their way down.

"Hm? Ah, allow me to deal with this heroes." Lysander said moving to the front of the group.

"Hail! Stop!" one of the guards called as the fellowship drew closer to them. The two groups were now a mere meter away.

"Looks like we have some visitors." The lead guard said with a nasty smile, giving an especially nasty look at Martin, who's enormous and beat up pack wasn't doing him any favors in the appearance area. Xephos surveyed the guards carefully - they were all in full iron garb with blue tunics supposedly for the color of the sky.

"Skylord Lysander, what do you mean by bringing vagabonds into the upper city?" the guard asked.

"They are not vagabonds!" Lysander said indignantly. He gestured to Xephos and Honeydew "these two are heroes. You owe them your allegiance."

"Heroes?" another guard asked curiously.

"Yes!" Lysander said almost exasperatedly. "They saved the town of Terrorvale from the evils of Israphel!" the guard's eyes widened at this revelation, everyone in the countryside had heard of the incident at Terrorvale and so had the guard fortunately.

"Do not say that name!" the first guard hissed, "Saved the town from Terrorvale? Ha! A likely story!"

"Do you doubt my honesty?" Lysander snapped.

"What about him then?" the guard gestured to Martin "He's a hero too then, I suppose?"

"He is my companion!" Xephos retorted. Martin nodded,

"Yeah um – I skipped a bath this morning."

"We shall trust your word Skylord. Let them through!" another guard said stepping aside and beckoning them forwards. The lead guard glared at him and begrudgingly stepped aside. The fellowship passed silently following Lysander closely as he could best justify their credibility and safety in the more restricted parts of the city.

It was only when they were out of the hearing of the guards when Lysander spoke,

"The security hasn't always been this tight…"

"What's it like usually?" Xephos asked.

"Ah hero, there has rarely been the need for many guards before. This sudden increase in security means something is amiss." Lysander explained never breaking stride.

"No bloody kidding." Honeydew muttered.

 _I wonder what's going on around here_ Xephos thought _first Peculier falls ill and now increased security at Mistral? Are they connected perhaps?_ He pondered this as Lysander led them past two more equally armed checkpoints and down the winding stone stairs to the lower city.

"Are the guards always that grouchy? They're worse than my Aunt Trudy." Honeydew surmised. Lysander shrugged,

"Some of them are a little under the weather from time to time…"

"A little?" Honeydew said "More like hostile!"

"Yeah I've received better welcomes from the monsters …" Xephos agreed.

Once the fellowship had reached the bottom of the tower and into the lower city they found themselves on a quiet, well lit part of the city which was clearly very well catered too. Houses and apartments lined the lane while young spruce trees shivered in the winds – and even more surprising was that there was hardly a pedestrian in sight.

Lysander gestured to the left towards the far less pristine part of the city, "This way heroes."

"Where are we going?" Martin asked curiously.

"To the Church of the Holy Apple." Lysander explained.

"That's where the Gold apple is right?" Xephos asked.

"Correct hero!" Lysander said. "But until we get there, stay close, lest we get lost in the crowd!"

Lysander had a very clear point about the crowd as it was truly massive. Xephos had not been in the city for a full day yet was amazed at the sheer number of people in Mistral. It was still early wintertime and snow lightly coated several roofs of the city, but the roads were largely void of snow, and pools of water dribbled into the nearby gutters. As curious as Xephos was to observe the scenery of Mistral he was also very aware of the dangers of getting lost. Currently, he had not lost pace with Lysander or any of the other companions to his very great relief. He looked to his right to see Martin was there with his bow slung over his back and his quiver stuffed into his enormous pack. Martin glanced back at him,

"Alright there? Taking in the sights?" Martin asked, gesturing grandly above the bustling crowd to the medieval looking houses and apartments that lined the streets.

"It's amazing." Xephos replied. It was true; he was in sheer awe over the sheer size of Mistral not to mention the sheer number of people in it as well as the sky city, which had certain majesty of its own.

"Eh you'll get used to it. Frankly it's pretty smelly to me more than anything else." Martin laughed, "You know all that body odor. It's terrible!"

"Ah! Come heroes, the Church is open!" Lysander called. Xephos looked over past the burly shape of the Skylord to one of oddest sights he had ever seen. The Church of the Holy Apple was a grand old white stone building and had been painted a neat shade of white. Around the church there was a grove of pleasant red and yellow flowers, and what appeared to be a bonsai tree. Suddenly a bell rang announcing the end of the service as a few parishioners began to stream out of the church. The fellowship waited by the door for a few minutes as several minutes later worshippers were still streamed out of the church, many of them well dressed in their Sunday best. At last the crowd from the church thinned and the last of several parishioners who were altar boys exited.

"Be good children!" a kindly voice called after them.

"Yes Father!" they said in unison. Xephos smiled at this sight, as he watched the boys passed by.

"Good afternoon Father!" Lysander boomed as the reverend appeared at the entryway of the church.

The reverend flashed a pure white smile at this greeting, "Ah! Lysander! Good to see you here."

"Father Braeburn right?" Honeydew asked uncertainly.

"Yes Dwarf! What can I do for you?" Father Braeburn said proudly, "You have quite a group with you today Lysander!"

"Yes Father, you see these are two great heroes of this land, may I present Xephos and Honeydew!" Lysander said gesturing to the two heroes.

"What about me?" Martin asked.

"And Martin, he helped show me the way here." Xephos said.

"Ah! Well good to see all of you then! I never expected to see heroes such as you at my humble abode! But I suspect things must get busy when you're doing Notches good work eh?" Father Braeburn said as he shook each of their hands enthusiastically – he shook Xephos' and Honeydew's with particular enthusiasm. "Let me tell all of you something, I haven't gotten this many new members at once in a year! You know the people here aren't quite popping the coffers if you know what I mean." Honeydew suppressed a laugh – making an odd burping noise instead.

"Sorry Father. We – uh, know exactly, exactly what you mean!"

"Yeah, it's a bit of a struggle isn't it?" Xephos agreed. "Um… getting people to come to church…"

"My apologies Father, we're here for a different reason I'm afraid." Lysander said.

"Oh?You don't wish to enroll in our membership roster? We have an excellent program!" Braeburn said curiously, "Ah well, forgive me heroes," he said to Xephos and his companion "people just don't seem to come to mass much these days…"

Xephos almost laughed at this statement, it was difficult not too. Braeburn had the sort of face that one would certainly have a difficult time forgetting. Braeburn sported very neatly trimmed black hair - which had been carefully brushed back - and a very thin black beard, which ended on both sides of the upper jaw of the his face. He was wearing a white priestly robe with a gold apple embroidered into the back and two small half-moon crescents - which were apparently golden apple slices - on the front side. _He looks_ , Xephos thought with a hint of amusement, _a bit like a disco fan…_

"We require two golden apples Father! So, um could we borrow the um…holy apple?" Xephos asked awkwardly. _This isn't going to end well_. Father Braeburn's expression turned as if from day to night at this very unholy request.

"B-but…no!" he cried – his sunglasses nearly falling off his nose in the process. Braeburn had a quick, deep, muddled voice, which made his reaction somewhat comical.

Honeydew scratched his beard, "So we take it that's a no…?" Braeburn gave him a withering look, and pulled out a small, gleaming gold apple from his robes,

"This… is a sacred symbol." He said sternly, as he pocketed the apple again.

"Honestly, Father we'd ask you for such a thing only in great need." Martin started up.

"Indeed." Lysander followed up, "Peculier is ill Father and it is essential that we have the apple to make him well again! I am sure you are aware of its healing properties..."

Braeburn fidgeted for a moment nervously as he digested this information, "Peculier? I remember him, Karpath's son?" Lysander nodded affirmatively, "How ill is he?"

"Peculier is in great danger Father, he is striken with taint!" Lysander explained.

"Yea, an old man could die!" Honeydew chimed in.

Braeburn sighed, and gripped the nearest pew very tightly, his face showing his clearly conflicting emotions. "I must think on it." He said solemnly. _You do that_ , Xephos thought _otherwise we're going to have to steal a religious symbol!_

"Shall we come back later Father?" Lysander inquired. Braeburn looked up distractedly,

"Yes, yes. Please! I must think on this some more… nice meeting you all," then clearly shaken, Braeburn turned and walked down the aisle towards the private access area of the church and disappeared. All was silent for a moment in the church save for the sound of a crackling torch near a portrait of St. Appleton, the church founder.

Lysander paused and looked out one of the church windows - it was late in the afternoon outside. "Well heroes, let's adjourn until tomorrow!" the rest of the fellowship nodded in mute agreement.

"Yeah I was getting tired anyway." Honeydew yawned.

"You know Braeburn's always been a bit too fond of that apple." Martin said tactlessly. Lysander shot him an icy glare. Xephos sighed, _there's got to be somewhere else we can get an apple that's not a religious symbol..._

The fellowship left the church dejected but not entirely disheartened as Braeburn had not outright denied their request but would at least think on it. As they left the church Martin bade them his farewell, he had a couple things to take care of at his place after all.

"Farewell heroes!" Martin said offering a brief wave as he turned the corner of the church and headed towards the dingier part of the city.

"Farewell!" Lysander called. Martin offered a final wave and with a flash of his blond hair he turned the corner and disappeared.

Xephos lowered his hand, _until we meet again,_ he thought.

After the group's departure from Martin and the Church of the Holy Apple, they followed Lysander on a beeline towards the Elysium.

They passed by a group of water pools at one of the city squares. Water filled each of the man- made pools to the brim and each one was well lit with torches placed at every end. It was all too well known about the tendency of foul things to spawn even in such a pure thing as water.

 _The square's the best lit part of the city!_ Xephos observed, and it was undoubtedly very aesthetically pleasing to boot. Each pool had a name, which was carved into the sides of them; one in particular was classically named the Pool of Hygiene. There were a total of seven pools in the square with the largest, by far, being the Pool of Hygiene and each one's water was continuously resupplied by waterfalls that flowed down from the upper city _._

"Wowww…" Honeydew murmured, glancing around the square.

"Hey Lysander, isn't this the place where Fumblemore told us to get that water from?" Xephos recalled as the three moved through the square.

"You're right about that hero." Lysander mused.

"Really? Ohh all right then… so where's the Pool of Life?" Honeydew asked stopping to look at the pool names. "I don't see it anywhere!"

"Oh – um it's that one." Lysander said pointing at the enormous pool labeled the Pool of Memory. Honeydew looked at Lysander suspiciously, stepped towards the pool, and took a quick look inside.

"Ahhh!" he jumped back in fright "Jebus Lewis! There's a dead squirrel in there!" Lysander pursed his lips at this,

"Yes… I was going to explain that…"

"Yeah, well go on then why are there a bunch of um… dead things in there?"

"Well... we had to rename it after there were some drownings I'm afraid. It is now the Pool of Memory" The two heroes laughed nervously at this revelation _that explains it then!_

"Oh –er uh that's ironic… I mean it's uh – unfortunate very unfortunate…" Honeydew said, trying extremely hard to control his mirth.

"Right, well… maybe we should get some of the water we need while we're here." Xephos interjected as he set his pack down on the cobblestone.

"An excellent idea hero!" Lysander said "Dwarf! Do you have a bottle?"

"Right…I've got one right here." Honeydew murmured checking his belt

"The more ingredients we collect the sooner we can help Peculier!" Lysander said excitedly as Honeydew pulled out an old water-skin and slowly began to fill it up.

"Lysander are you sure Fumblemore knows what he's doing?" Xephos asked as Honeydew went about his business.

"No – not really, but we better hope he does!"

After their stop at the pool the trio adjourned to Lysander's Elysium which, although it did not offer much in the way of comfort was exceptionally well heated by steam vents that ran through the place.

"Eli!" Lysander boomed as the three entered the Elysium, "How is Peculier?"

Eli turned to him, a goblet of wine in hand. He was sitting in one of Lysander's lounge chairs near the mantelpiece; he took another sip of his goblet before responding,

"Lysander! A pleasure to see you – I had a feeling you would get back before I turned in."

"Of course Eli, of course!" Lysander beamed "It is fortunate that you did not leave sooner. But first, Peculier – is he stable - ?"

"He's still alive with time I reckon he should be alright." Eli said taking a sip of his wine. Eli was a shaggily dressed man who looked like a man kicked out of the house a couple years too early without a shaver let alone a decent haircut. This assessment was well shown by his choice of dress - shaggy pale green coat - and his very long black hair which nearly reached to his shoulders. In fact, nearly every bit of Eli looked old or tattered in one way or another, as if he had begotten basic hygiene.

"Ah thank Notch for that!" Lysander smiled. "What other news of his condition?"

Eli set aside his emptied goblet and tipped his head back in the chair, "Let's see… well… the stroke passed a while ago, he's sleeping like at the moment."

"Where is he?"

"I put him in the guest room Skylord."

"You have a guest room?" Honeydew blurted out. "And I was sleeping on that bloody lopsided, glorified stone tablet all last night - ?"

"Thank you Eli." Lysander interrupted. Eli laughed,

"No problem Skylord, it's always a pleasure to help out… especially when free drinks are involved in the equation..."

"You have a bar? WHAT!" Honeydew exclaimed. Xephos laughed, while Lysander shot Eli an indignant glare.

"Eli…" Lysander started but he waved him off.

"Sure Dwarf, it's right here." Eli stood up out of his chair, moved aside a floor rug, and then a set of loose planks to reveal an underground alcoholic storage.

"Oooh, Lysander please…" Honeydew started looking longingly at the many flasks in the tiny underground storage compartment near Eli's feet.

Lysander sighed, "Go ahead hero, there's enough to go around."

Honeydew didn't need telling twice, within a few moments he had his pack set aside and was heartily popping the cork of Lysander's best beer.

Eli laughed "Careful Dwarf! You want to make it last, savor it a little."

"Mmmmmmm!" Honeydew agreed sucking the dregs out of his first bottle, then burping loudly causing all of them to laugh.

Xephos leaned over and picked one up from inside the mini cellar and examined it curiously, the label read:

 _M &Mmmmm Ale, The best stuff on Earth._

"Is this Bode's?" he asked curiously setting himself down neatly in one of the armchairs.

"No, but this is just as good as you might have noticed by the label." Lysander said taking a bottle for himself.

"Oh yeah. It is called M & Mmmmm Ale isn't it?"

"For a reason." Lysander smiled.

"So," Eli said taking another sip from his goblet "what brings you to Mistral? And, we haven't been introduced… who are you?"

"Oh, sorry – I'm Xephos and he's Honeydew." Xephos said gesturing to his friend who was sucking the dregs out of another emptied bottle. "Peculier and Lysander are our companions. And we have flown – er I mean we have traveled with them for many weeks."

"Have you?" Eli said interestedly, "What for - ?"

"The beer! This is great stuff Lysander…" Honeydew said as he began chugging his third bottle. Xephos laughed, even Lysander managed a small chuckle although it was obvious that Honeydew's rapid depletion of his stores was more than a little unnerving to him.

"We are here to treat old Peculier, Fumblemore's the only one who can help." Lysander explained.

"Ah!" Eli's green eyes brightened at this, "Your friend must be in some major trouble if you need _his_ help! Have you considered all other options?"

"Believe me, I did." Lysander said tiredly. Eli whistled,

"What's his problem?"

"He is sickened with taint. He had a stroke on the way here… of course he was quite feeble beforehand…" Lyander explained.

"And you thought that it sounded like a job for Fumblemore eh?" Eli asked. "Sounds a bit questionable that."

"Agreed!" Honeydew and Xephos said at once.

"I admit it; I have had doubts… about his ability." Lysander said.

"Yeah well, if you need someone to blow shit up he's your man." Honeydew muttered. Eli smiled and shook his head at this,

"What fetch quest did he send you on?"

"Well he gave us a list of ingredients for his potion – to cure all ills – we uh need five dirt, two golden apples, five feathers, and some water, from the Pool of Life, I mean Memory." Xephos recalled. Eli burst out laughing at this,

"Oh yes the Pool of Memory… I remember that place, the one with all the drownings right?" he asked raucously. Lysander glared at him,

" _People_ died in there Eli!"

"It's the irony of it Skylord, gets me every time." Eli replied, "So, dirt eh? Typical Fumblemore with his silly ingredients – I can tell you that those apples are the only thing that's going to do any good for him."

"So are the other ingredients bad for him?" Xephos asked with very legitimate curiosity.

"Well… sorry who are you again? I forgot your name." Eli said causing Honeydew to laugh,

"I'm Xephos."

"Well, Xephoz let me ask you this, when did drinking dirt, not to mention a bucket of gunpowder do anyone _any_ good?"

Xephos smiled, "Fair point."

"If it saves Peculier from taint then this may be another first." Lysander pointed out. Eli raised his goblet to Lysander,

"Aye Skylord, it may be. But if you cure his ailment with all that rubbish I'll be out of a job!" Eli pointed out, "Oh anyone remember that one healer – Eli? Well we don't need to see him anymore, because the senile old wizard will make us better!"

The company laughed at this and raised their glasses in agreement.

"So have you got any of the ingredients so far?" Eil asked curiously.

"Well we've got a bit of water from that pool…maybe a gold apple, some dirt, and all of the feathers." Honeydew tallied as he reached for another drink.

"Maybe a gold apple?" Eli asked. "You can't maybe have a gold apple. Those things are rare, either you've got one or you don't."

"We need an apple from the Church of the Holy Apple, and Father Braeburn told us he would… what was it again? Oh yeah that he would think on our request." Xephos explained.

"Yep we just need the one item that's a sacred symbol…" Honeydew said. Eli smiled at this,

"Brilliant! Wonder what the look was on Braeburn's face at that one!"

"Not very pleased." Honeydew replied.

"Really?" Eli guffawed.

"It _is_ the Church of the Holy Apple after all." Lysander replied icily, setting his half-emptied wineglass aside.

"True Skylord, true. Ah well I wish you luck getting that one."

"Yeah… just curious but do you know of another place where there's um an unholy apple, or something?" Xephos asked.

"Let's see, there's Granny Bacon's Tea and... Whoopie Parlor, hero." Eli informed him. _Whoopie Parlor?_ Xephos thought whimsically. "She might be able to help you but it will be a great cost, the last I heard she only had a few in stock!" _Brilliant,_ Xephos thought, _so we've got to get a sacred symbol from the reverend and an apple from the bloody Whoopie Parlor…_

"Really? Oooh! Let's get that one Lewis!" Honeydew said excitedly. Eli laughed,

"Sure you can if you have ten diamonds."

Honeydew nearly choked on his beer once he heard this, "TEN DIAMONDS? That's a _terrible_ deal!" Eli shrugged and took another sip of his bottle,

"Don't blame me dwarf, I'm just the messenger."

Xephos sighed, "I wonder if we trade something for the holy apple?"

"Hrm… maybe, maybe we could bribe him with beer!" Honeydew started, "You know, maybe we could give him a few casks of ale and make it the Church of the Holy Happy Hour or something." All of them except Lysander laughed at this,

"The Father's a T-totaler hero except for an occasional sip of sacramental apple juice now and then." Lysander said stiffly.

"Sacramental apple juice?" Honeydew guffawed "Oh that's classic."

"I hear he's a big fan of music." Eli mused.

"That's it!" Xephos interjected, "That's what he looks like - a disco fan!"

"What kind of music? Disco?" Honeydew asked drunkenly.

"Well, I'm not sure. All I know is, Braeburn likes his music; after all you can dance to the hymns in there! Maybe you could get him a really good hymnal or the like?" Eli said wryly as he drained his goblet. "Well Skylord, heroes thanks for the drink and the conversation." He finished as he stood up and staggered to the door "By the way Skylord, I tried sleeping on that bed up there - for a nap - while you were gone and it was absolute murder. You really out to get that checked out you know, could cause some _serious_ back trouble later." He said as he struggled to balance a rather ugly feather-duster on his head.

"Must've lost my hat." Eli muttered as the three companions burst out laughing at the spectacle.

"Watch it!" Honeydew exclaimed as he stumbled over to him, "Lemme help you find it." The Dwarf said drunkenly as he started picking up items at random and tossing them away. "That's not a hat -" Honeydew mumbled as he tossed a large wooden stick to the side. "Hey Lysander, where's the hat rack?"

"Oh give it here." Lysander said tiredly as he strode over to Eli and Honeydew who were currently trying to stick their heads in the same umbrella stand, apparently in search of the hat.

"It's not in here either!" Honeydew cried "Oi- geroff, you're messing up my beard!" he cried as he attempted to dislodge his head from the jar.

"It's your fat head that's getting us stuck!" Eli yelled. Xephos roared with laughter at the sight of Honeydew's and Eli's heads wedged together in the same umbrella stand.

"Come on you two…" Lysander said tiredly, holding Eli's hat in hand.

"Maybe you could get out of it if you put your heads together?"

"Not funny! Not funny!" Honeydew whined.

"Perhaps you need some assistance… hero?" Lysander asked awkwardly.

"Er- No! I mean yes! I'm not alright at all!" Honeydew said pushing more violently against the jar in another vigorous attempt to dislodge himself. "Oh bugger it…We're stuck!"

"In Notches name! Spaceman, grab him for me!" Lysander cried as he grabbed hold of the scruff of Eli's collar.

"No problem Lysander." Xephos smiled as the two drunks were now whining in pain. Xephos got up, placed his finished drink aside and grabbed the back of Honeydew's jerkin with both hands.

"Oi watch it-!" Honeydew squealed.

"Be careful!" Eli yelled.

"On the count of three!" Lysander commanded. "One…two…three!" as he and Xephos gave a tremendous tug,

"AIEEEE!" Honeydew and Eli screamed.

"Got you!" Xephos cried as Honeydew's bearded face came out with a loud pop.

"Aaaah… ohhhh gods… thanks for that…" Honeydew moaned as he gently scratched his head. Likewise, Eli groaned and slowly rubbed the back of his neck. "Ooooh… sorry about that Skylord." He burped. Lysander gave him an icy glare,

"I believe sleep is in order." He said sternly as he ushered an apologetic Eli outside. _Yeah_ Xephos thought as they put the main room of the Elysium back in order once Honeydew had vanished to the bedroom. _Gods… tomorrow's our last chance to get the apple and the necessary supplies for the potion to save Peculier!_

Once they had returned the liquor to its place and had cleaned up the rest of the room they talked a while longer that evening. According to Lysander, Eli's medicines had slowed Peculier's taint but would not cure him of it,

"He will only last so long hero. I fear for the fate of the world if this disease spreads."

"The fate of the world? Why? What's happening?" Xephos asked, "Things don't look too bad around here, from what I've seen." Lysander sighed,

"It is because everything isn't fine hero. There was sand, around your cave – I don't know how it got there but that sand was tainted." Lysander explained "Anyone who comes into contact with it for long enough is at risk as I fear Peculier might have done after the crash near the seaside."

"Unusual sand? Lysander, it was a beach for cripes sake!"

"I know that hero." Lysander deadpanned. "What I mean is, it might have been near that portal. You might recall there was a great deal of sand around your cave."

"Yeah… but it was near a beach – a beach Lysander. If that sand was tainted or something then we should all be sick by now right?"

Lysander sighed and shook his head, "I do not know hero. The best I can do is speculate that it was the case. After all, it was near a Nether portal and you might remember your erm… dwarf friend knocked him into one. Such things have an evil influence."

"What is taint?" Xephos asked.

"It is…a mind disease hero." Lysander replied. _A mind disease, a form of mind control maybe?_ Xephos wondered.

"Where are the sands coming from? What does taint cause? And how did Peculier become ill so suddenly? Did it have something to do with his stroke?" Xephos asked in frustration. Lysander shrugged,

"You ask many questions hero."

"I haven't gotten a lot of answers." Xephos said. "First the cave's blow up, Peculier falls ill and now the world's at stake! There has to be some reason for how Israphel's doing all this!" Lysander smiled at him before continuing.

"Very well hero, I will try to answer your queries. As to your first question- there originally was a small desert northeast of Lastwatch hold near an abandoned town called Isal. Many years ago a young man lived in that town that used to venture out into the desert regularly. The why, is unknown to me for what I tell you now is legend, long lost from history." Lysander paused and continued, "His name is not known, but it is said his family was brutally murdered by another, a family known as the Angmars. The Angmars were a very powerful and terrible family in their day, although they were not of noble birth they bought off those that were while they terrorized the local populace for their benefit. Many of their victims – or those they quarreled with or who stood up to them were brutally beaten or killed. As for the young man's family, they were murdered and their ravaged bodies were dumped at his doorstep. The murder drove the young man mad; naturally he tried to avenge the death of his family. One day he went into the sands and simply disappeared, never to be seen or heard of again. It is not known what happened to him, as far as history tells us the young man, whoever he was is no more. However, a curious thing occurred after his death, the sand dunes in the desert began to swell and spread. Isal was swallowed up and now is buried many miles underneath the sands- the cause of this terrible occurrence is not known either but one thing is. The last of the Angmar family was killed in a sandstorm shortly after the sands started to spread. So there you have it," Lysander finished "the tale of the spread of the sands. As to what I have heard hero, some say the young man found a way to use the sands to avenge his murdered relatives. Others say it is a curse from Notch for the terrible crimes of humanity. Truthfully hero I do not know if either of those theories is true. Although… I prefer to believe that the second of these theories is false."

"Oh… then the Angmars got what they deserved didn't they?" Xephos asked.

"Indeed, I would agree." Lysander said calmly "The Angmars were a terrible family; they killed many people and ruled the old lands with terror- that is true. But the sands killed many innocents as well. It is unfortunate that anyone died at all, especially the horrible deaths of the young man's family and that of the Angmars regardless if either deaths were deserved or not." Xephos nodded,

"Right, right… so the story, did the expansion, growth, or whatever of the sands have to do with the young man?"

Lysander gazed at him thoughtfully, "There does seem to be an interesting coincidence there, although there is a chance that the spread of the sands was a natural occurrence."

"Yeah but, sand doesn't move that fast." Xephos said. Lysander laughed,

"Of course hero. Again, it is a legend but I agree it is curious that the sands moved so quickly, and killed, of all people, the Angmars shortly after the young man disappeared into the desert. It seems… fantastical though that he was able to use the sands like that…"

"Why? Israphel's doing it." Xephos replied.

"True hero, a fine example!" Lysander admitted, "However I prefer to base any conclusions I draw off of facts rather than an alignment of interconnected events."

Xephos sighed and leaned back in Lysander's chair, "That's well then, but you haven't answered the other questions."

"Ah yes! Of course hero. Skylords and victims that I have spoken to… they claim that taint comes from the sands as I have already told you. Many men and women have traveled into the cursed desert and most have come back raving mad about robots and mysterious machines – these are intriguing but fantastic tales in my opinion." Lysander paused to scratch his beard "However, that is only what accounts of unfortunate adventures by other Skylords tell me hero. As for the circumstances of Peculier's ailment I would guess that it was from contact with the sand at the cave based on what is known of the sands."

"The healer - Eli he doesn't know where it comes from either?" Xephos asked.

"No hero, as you might have noticed from your meeting with him." Lysander said tiredly.

 _Noticed what? That he's a drunk?_ Xephos thought. "How does the um… taint thing work?"

"A very good question hero and I do not hold the answer to it. This was why I wished to go to Skyhold, as there is knowledge there that holds the answers to your questions. However I can tell you one thing- there is something that lies within the sands, some kind of machine supposedly but I do not know for sure. What I do know, is that it is feared above all else!" _Well that was illuminating._ Xephos thought sarcastically.

"A machine?"

"Of some kind, yes." Lysander replied. _A machine?_ Xephos thought, _what machine could be buried in the sands that would be feared that much?_

"Oh right umm… what was that pink potion you gave him earlier, at the cave?"

"To who?"

"Peculier."

"Peculier? What do you mean - ah you're talking about what I gave him to stop the stroke?" Lysander asked, "Ah yes, that was merely a regeneration potion, one of Eli's brews come to think of it...Well hero, I'd better be off, and it's late. There will be time to pursue the answers to these questions at a better hour!" Lysander said giving Xephos a you-should-go-to-bed -too look.

Xephos yawned, as he glanced at the clock over the mantelpiece; apparently it was one a.m. in the morning. Xephos didn't need telling twice that it was definitely bedtime, _my eyelids feel as heavy as stone anyway_ he thought as he slowly got up out of the armchair, and followed Lysander up to the long night that awaited him.

 **A/N: Wondering who that young man who was victimized by the Angmars is? You'll find out soon.**


	6. The Astley Residence

**SOI Chapter 6 The Astley Residence**

 **A/N: Hey guys I'm back with another edited chapter of the Shadow of Israphel! This one's pretty long- you have been warned.**

 **Some interesting stuff happens in this one ;)**

The room was black, as far as the old man could tell. _I can't see anything in here!_ He thought squinting and barely making out the outline of a man in dark robes in front of him.

"Who are you?" Peculier asked. The figure ignored him. "I said, who are you?" Peculier repeated his request. Again there was no response. Where am I? "What's going on?!" he yelled, but the figure again did not answer him. Instead the figure abruptly vanished in a swirl of black particles that suddenly surrounded Peculier. "What's going on?" Peculier yelled. He tried to move but his limbs weren't responding. Suddenly he dropped down with a loud thump into a soft substance.

"Ouch!" Peculier cried as he slowly tried to gather his bearings. The black particles were gone, it was nighttime. _Where am I?_ Peculier thought as he glanced around him. The soft substance on which Peculier had landed was sand, and as far as he could see the land was infused with sand. It was nighttime.

"Sand and more sand…" Peculier said softly as he looked around in every direction for any sign of life let alone civilization. There was none. Peculier looked far ahead of him, even the walls were not there. There were no monsters as far as Peculier could see either, although the landscape was dotted with several cactuses. Peculier fumbled at his belt but found that he had no sword, all he had were the clothes on his back and his fists.

"Fantastic." Peculier grumbled. Deciding that he might as well try to find some way out Peculier set off along a northern course in the sands. For a while there was nothing and Peculier was getting increasingly hungry. _There has to be something_ Peculier thought hopefully. Suddenly, he saw something poking out of the sands, something red. Curious, Peculier slid down the side of a sand dune to get a closer look. The sand had converged around the red object forming a dip in the sands. Carefully Peculier crouched near the hole in the sands and peered down.

The place was a room, as far as Peculier could see. There was a single man in the room, he was lying face-down, and blood splattered the walls. Although whether the blood was the man's he could not tell. Something terrible had happened there, that was the only thing that was clear. Grunting with effort Peculier leaned over the crevice and hoisted himself on the red object and began to lower himself down into the room. Thankfully the red object was part of a pole and led all the way down. After a few moments Peculier reached the bottom of the pole into the chamber. It was dark, moonlight shone directly over the hole but nowhere else. Peculier peered into the surrounding darkness and listened carefully for monsters for a moment but the sight let alone the sound of one was not forthcoming. In spite of himself Peculier almost smiled as he gave the place a once over. There was nothing in the chamber, no chests let alone any supplies. In fact, all that Peculier could see was the man lying face down in front of him on the rotted wood floors- which clearly suggested the place had long been buried by the sands.

Peculier bent over the mysterious man and felt his pulse for a moment, it was still there. Carefully Peculier rolled the man face-up, checking for any wounds on him. Peculier nearly fell over in shock at the sight of the man's face. The man was old, with brown and gray streaked hair, he looked ordinary except there was something horribly different about him – his eyes were red.

"No…" Peculier exclaimed. The old man sat up and looked at Peculier as if he was in a trance. Suddenly he grabbed Peculier's shoulders and started shaking him "I'm sorry, I've failed! It's over! They're dead! They're all DEAD!" the old man yelled.

"Agh!" Peculier cried trying to distance himself from the old man who had started shaking Peculier even harder. 

"I was a fool to trust…IT'S OVER! Don't you understand? THEY'RE ALL DEAD!" he screamed grabbing a knife from his belt trying to stab Peculier with it. "No one…will ever…make it out! The sands…the sands…they suffocated everyone- everything…" he panted, his eyes glowing like red flame.

Peculier felt himself getting steadily weaker as he tried to shield himself with his hands. "It must be done…master I have failed…." The man howled in anguish as he raised his hand getting ready to strike.

But the attack never came. The old man was on the ground, an arrow through his back. His hand fell to the ground as a pool of red spread across his chest. Peculier cried out and grabbed the man, tearing the knife out of his hand. "No! Please …" Peculier said. The man looked at Peculier, the red was gone from his eyes. "The sands…I wish we had never done it to him…" he said as his eyes glazed over and he spoke no more.

"NOOO!" Peculier screamed. But it was no use. Peculier could feel himself getting weaker and weaker. "No…I don't understand- please…" Peculier cried as he collapsed to the floor, he was starving to death. Gradually Peculier heard a strange buzzing that grew louder and louder, the black particles had returned. They consumed his face, his eyes and his ears, Peculier tried to bat them away with a weak swipe of his hands but it was to no avail. Peculier wondered what had happened to the old man before the blackness closed in and he saw no more.

Honeydew had the most monumental of all hangovers. It was like the Dwarf had been hit repeatedly over the head with a wooden sledgehammer, and the light emitting from the bedside window was not helping the Dwarf's miserable situation at all. Clutching his head painfully he stumbled out of bed into the nearby bathroom to the left of the hall right into a very amused Xephos.

"Uh- er morning." Honeydew said awkwardly. The spaceman just smiled.

"Have you got a razor Simon?" Xephos asked scratching the new stubbly beard that had sprouted around the spaceman's neck.

"And some cream!" Lysander called.

"Yeah and er some cream perhaps?"

"Uh I might have some in the trunk."

"The trunk? What trunk?" Xephos asked puzzled.

"The trunk! You know…the thing looks like a chest." Honeydew explained struggling mightily with his words as the hangover was still wearing off. Xephos laughed as he strode over to the bedroom.

"Ooooh…" Honeydew groaned as he walked down the hallway to the main bedroom where the Skylord and Peculier were currently resting. The dwarf paused at the bedroom door adjusting his eyes to the blast of light that greeted him there.

"Oi- Hey Lysander are you there?"

"Aye hero." A muffled voice responded. "Peculier could you close those blind for me- oh never mind I'll do it…" the Skylord grumbled. Suddenly there was a crash and the bedroom became instantly dim.

"Ahh!" Honeydew cried "I was just getting used to all that light Lysander…"

"How'd you like the guest room hero?" Lysander asked the confused dwarf absentmindedly as he shuffled through some papers.

"Oh- um it's very comfortable thanks Skylord." Honeydew admitted it was very comfortable it beat the heck out of sleeping on that glorified stone tablet which the dwarf had slept on the night before. "I just came here to see how he's – you know how he's doing." Honeydew said gesturing to the mostly bald head that was Peculier.

"He's sleeping peacefully hero, as far as I can tell." Lysander said standing and pulling out his pipe.

"Brilliant!" Honeydew said although somewhat doubtfully considering how incredibly uncomfortable the bed in there was. _I just wish the same could be said for my head!_ The dwarf thought mournfully.

"Do you have a shower around here Lysander?" Honeydew inquired becoming increasingly aware of his bedraggled appearance.

"Of course hero, down the hall and to the right." Lysander replied as he poured over some official looking papers on the table. "But the plumbing's not too good I'm afraid!" the Skylord called. Honeydew muttered a reply as he slowly made his way to the shower room gripping his head painfully as another headache came on.

"The plumbing's not too good he says…wonderful…"

The shower room was surprisingly well lit from a skylight that adorned the top of the room. Water, water Honeydew thought blindly stumbling around in the shower. _Are those pink towels?_ The Dwarf thought for a moment noting for some reason, a couple monogramed pink towels which had been hung up near the shower.

"Initialed S.J. …" Honeydew wondered aloud as he pulled the showerhead chain tearing his eyes away from the ugly towels. _Wonder what that means, monogramed towels?_ He thought as the Dwarf pulled the chain. Nothing was forthcoming, no water.

Honeydew pulled the chain again but no water came.

"You bloody—aaaargh!" Honeydew yelled pulling the chain harder again and again. Finally the Dwarf heard a gurgle come through the pipes. It's working! The Dwarf thought excitedly. Suddenly a blast of water shot from the showerhead toppling Honeydew.

"AAAAAARGH!" Honeydew cried in shock as he was thrown against the wall by the sheer force of the water now streaming uncontrollably from the showerhead.

"OI -Lysander! Xephos! Somebody! HELLLP!" the Dwarf cried struggling to get up out of the way of the torrent of water. _The plumbing definitely doesn't work!_

"Hero!" the Skylord's deep voice called "Are you alright?"

"Um – no I'm definitely not alright Lysander. What do you hell do you think? HELLLLP!" Honeydew replied as he crawled to the rim of the tub trying to get out of the blast of water streaming from the showerhead. As he did so the Skylord and Xephos rushed through the door.

"What the-" Xephos said gazing at the jet of water that was streaming rapidly out the faucet.

"Ah! I've got it hero…" Lysander said reaching for the showerhead chain. The Skylord gave a tremendous yank and the showerhead silent and the only thing that came out of it were a few drops of water.

"Oy…" Honeydew grunted, Xephos reached forward pulling the soaked Dwarf out of the bathtub.

"Lysander, a towel please!" Xephos exclaimed to the Skylord who had paused briefly to examine the showerhead. "Curious…" he said turning to the spaceman and a fairly irritated and now shivering Dwarf "Oh right! Forgive me heroes, the towels indeed." Lysander said apologetically grabbing a bundle of pink towels from a nearby shelf, handing them to the spaceman.

"You're a saint Skylord." Honeydew said taking the entire bundle of towels and wrapping himself in them. Xephos laughed.

"Let's get you somewhere warm hero, follow me." The Skylord directed stepping out of the bathroom and striding over to the guest bedroom, the spaceman and the shivering Dwarf in tow.

"Are you sure you're alright Simon?" Xephos asked the shivering Dwarf who was now wrapped in seven of the Skylord's best pink towels.

"I'll need a few minutes…" Honeydew replied as he struggled to bring the steaming glass of tea Lysander had brought him (moments before) to his mouth.

"I wasn't aware the plumbing was that bad." Lysander observed surveying the sopping wet Dwarf in front of him. _Well for your information it bleepin' well is!_ The Dwarf thought angrily.

"Did you bring a change of clothes with you hero?" Lysander asked as he paused to rub his moisturized goggles with a handkerchief.

"Um…" _Oh you FOOL!_ Honeydew thought unhappily.

"They must've been burnt in the crash." Xephos surmised grimly. Lysander sighed.

"This is unfortunate hero but I think I might have something your size…" Lysander trailed off as he stepped out of the room for a moment "EWLING!" the Skylord was yelling at his butler.

"Yes sir?" the butler replied.

"Please light the grate and heat the sitting room as much as possible!" the Skylord ordered. "Alright hero…" the Skylord called before reappearing near the landing shortly thereafter with a small bundle of clothes in his hands. "Change quickly, a busy day awaits us!"

"A busy-what? Hey Lysander…hang on whose are those?" Honeydew asked bemusedly looking at the pile of blue and black clothes Lysander had just tossed onto the Dwarf's bedside.

"They look like yours Lysander…" Xephos said thoughtfully. The Skylord smiled slyly seemingly confirming Xephos' assumption. "Indeed hero, they are the colors of the Icarian Order of the Skylords which I am part of." Lysander explained to an utterly bemused Honeydew.

"They're…yours?" Xephos asked uncertainly looking at the small clothes; they were much too small for the Skylord.

"No heroes they're not mine personally but they might be a fit for you Dwarf." Lysander mused "You are now Skylord Jankle hero!" the Skylord said seizing the clothes and thrusting them into the Dwarf's lap.

"Oh yeah Jankle I was just getting fond of that name too…" Honeydew murmured draining the rest of his tea, setting the cup aside on a nearby tea cozy.

"Indeed, here you are hero." Lysander said tossing a pair of honorary goggles to the Dwarf "Wear these at all times lest anyone suspect you're an impostor." And with that warning in mind the Skylord popped out of the room yelling something at Ewling about milk and eggs.

"Right…" Honeydew said putting the goggles on his forehead after drying that part of himself off with the end of a towel. "I look very…Skylord-y don't I? Long beard, about five feet tall, giant pickaxe over his back looks like a Skylord to me!" Xephos laughed throwing a shirt at a still quite wet Honeydew.

"You look like a wet pink mop." Xephos said, Honeydew opened his mouth in indignation at this sentiment but Xephos just smiled and turned towards the door "Get dressed Simon." The spaceman said good naturedly as he left Honeydew to dry himself and get changed. The spaceman himself had changed earlier from his bloodied, torn and thoroughly worn out red space shirt into a beige one which gave Xephos the appearance of an overgrown pear, or so he thought. Xephos strode down the hall into the main bedroom as he knew he had to get dressed and ready himself.

The main bedroom was as dimly lit as ever, sacks of books and papers – many of them full of navigational charts of the Skylord's – littered the floors, lying in piles everywhere. The room was in fact almost uninhabited save for the lump in the bed which suggested the silent presence of Peculier.

"Pecu-" Xephos started when the realization hit him that the old man wouldn't be able to hear him anyway whilst asleep. Instead, the spaceman focused his attentions on finding his bunk (which was in fact only a couple of cloaks and a pillow) as it was where his pack, sword and bow rested.

"Excellent." Xephos said as he pulled out his diamond blade by the hilt from under his pillow. The pure white blade flashed in the dim lighting of the room as the spaceman admired it briefly before re-sheathing it.

The spaceman decided to travel lightly leaving most unnecessary items from his pack - some of which included a spinning top and a lever – save for a sack of dirt he'd collected ages ago which was a needed ingredient for Fumblemore's cure all potion. As he tightened his belt the spaceman slung his well wrapped diamond blade over his back. _Right_ Xephos thought checking a mental list of everything he'd need _the sword yes, dirt yes, food can get that later…bow… yep_. Xephos was all set as he stepped out of the room but not before turning to the dark shape of old Peculier.

"We'll save you…as soon as we can." Xephos resolved to himself as the memories flooded back, especially of the despair that had nearly overtaken Peculier in Terrorvale when he discovered Daisy was missing. _I'll never let that happen again, not to him…_ the spaceman resolved as he finally left the room down the hallway towards the guest room. _Better check on Honeydew_ Xephos thought, it had been according to the spaceman's clock, forty minutes since!

"Simon? Are you ready yet?" Xephos asked knocking on the door.

"As soon as I get this…ruddy…sock…ON!" Honeydew's muffled voice exclaimed back through the door. Did Lysander find clothes too small for a Dwarf? Xephos wondered slightly concerned.

"Hello!" Honeydew bellowed "TA-DA!"

"Wha-?" Xephos stared starting at the Dwarf "Oh what!" the spaceman exclaimed as he stared at the Dwarf taking his transformation in. The Skylord's clothes had rendered the Dwarf nearly beyond transformation, _he looks_ Xephos thought quite rationally _like a Skylord actually…_

"Wow…um…where's Honeydew? What have you done with my friend?" Xephos asked with feigning shock.

"I look amazing!"

"Well come on then we've got to get those ingredients." Xephos said clapping Honeydew on the back as the spaceman turned downstairs. Honeydew grunted in assent pausing by a nearby mirror as he took a comb to a particularly uncooperative curl in his beard.

The Dwarf had barely started combing the curl in his beard by the time the spaceman was downstairs. At the landing Xephos suddenly felt a rush of very hot air. Downstairs was like a tropical forest _, the heater must work really well_ Xephos thought stealing a glance at the enormous fireplace that graced the sitting room.

"Take a seat lad!" a voice called to his left, distracting the spaceman from his brief infatuation with the fire.

"Good morning hero!" Lysander boomed "Ah! All ready to go I see! Excellent, excellent." The Skylord said taking notice of the light pack and the sheathed sword slung over the spaceman's back. Lysander was at the dining table to the far left of the sitting room and was apparently being served an enormous platter of eggs by an impeccably dressed Ewling.

"Good morning Lysander." Xephos said politely.

"Please sit hero!" the Skylord said as Ewling quickly moved out the char nearest to the Skylord for the spaceman.

"Thanks." Xephos said Ewling offered a light bow and moved back through the right-hand door, which by the smell of food, Xephos judged to be the kitchen.

"There is a great deal to be done hero." Lysander started, pausing to stuff himself with a mouthful of scrambled eggs chewing them furiously. Xephos could not have agreed with the Skylord's sentiment more as the spaceman took a fork to his platter of puffy yellow eggs whilst Lysander continued. "Today hero, is the day of my inquiry before Skylord Naboth and the other members of the SkyCouncil a notice for it…" Lysander continued addressing the look of utter surprise on Xephos' face "arrived in the post this morning. What is more important hero is what you will do!" Xephos nodded in assent, _gods these eggs are delicious!_ he thought pleasantly as he polished off the rest of his fork before responding.

"How long with the inquiry last?" the spaceman asked concernedly, _it must be for the crash of the Celeno, no wonder Lysander had been so angry!_

"Many hours, more than I can count I'm afraid!" the Skylord said morosely "Unfortunately hero, I will not be able to guide you to where you need to go for the ingredients. However someone will be coming by soon who will be able to do so."

"Martin?" Xephos asked. Lysander nodded as he took another bite out of his bacon. _Excellent!_ Xephos remembered his lighthearted, blond companion well. "Lysander," Xephos started suddenly remembering a question that had bothered him a great deal ever since the day Fumblemore had listed off the ingredients to them "do you know a place where we can get a bit of gunpowder?" Lysander almost dropped his fork at the question. The Skylord knew all too well just where gunpowder came from, _Creepers…_ Xephos thought darkly.

"Well, you could try the Astley residence hero. Mr. Astley is a vendor for gunpowder."

"Oh, brilliant!" Xephos exclaimed, _we don't need to kill Creepers after all!_ The spaceman almost cheered at the thought. "Does Martin know where his house is?"

"Oh I wouldn't worry about that sir, there's not a soul in Mistral who doesn't know about Mr. Astley…" Ewling the butler had spoken up, he had reappeared for a moment. Lysander nodded exchanging a brief look with the butler. _Is there something I don't know?_ Xephos thought momentarily curious.

"Yes…well hero Eli will be around to look after Peculier, should anything happen he will be able to manage it." Lysander explained as the Skylord stood up having finished his breakfast.

"When is the Church open, so we can see Father Braeburn?" Xephos asked tearing the last strip of his bacon.

"At around two in the afternoon hero. Do you-"

"Here." Xephos said pulling the gold clock out of his front pocket. Lysander smiled "Good luck hero! Remember Peculier depends on you!" the Skylord said as he too checked his watch. "Let's see…half past eleven…I'll be late if I don't hurry…." The Skylord muttered absentmindedly as he strode past the threshold and out the door.

"Farewell hero!" Lysander called giving Xephos a last look and disappearing out the door.

"Farewell Lysander." Xephos replied with a wave of his hand.

"Yeah see yeh Skylord!" a gruff voice joined in. _Honeydew, he's awake!_ Xephos thought, the Dwarf's voice was very recognizable especially by its somewhat garbled tone from the massive hangover he was suffering.

"Good morning Simon." Xephos greeted his Dwarven companion warmly motioning to the table where at that moment; Ewling had set out a complete omelet for him.

"Wha-oh yeah morning…hang on is that breakfast?" Honeydew asked, the smell of the food seeming to bring him out of his stupor. Then with an almost unbelievable speediness the Dwarf bounded down the stairs and within the minute had sat himself in front of the full omlet platter Ewling had prepared for him.

"Zwheree eid Lyzander go?" Honeydew asked his mouth completely stuffed with the omlet.

"His inquiry apparently, before the other Skylords." Xephos said curiously I hope it goes well. Honeydew made what sounded like a choking sound before managing to sputter disbelievingly "His inquiry? What?"

"Lysander's on trial because of the crash of the Celeno. You remember it happened a few days ago." Xephos explained.

"Oh yeah…Will he be alright? They're not going to sentence him or anything are they?"

"Oh I wouldn't worry about that sir. Skylord Lysander has been through this before but the worst that ever happened was a three day suspension of his Skylord license." Ewling the butler broke in, exiting as quietly as he had come with Xephos' completely polished off plate.

"Oh…that's not so bad then!" Honeydew said cheerily. No it doesn't sound bad at all. Xephos thought comfortably as he gazed off at a picture of the Skylord's grandfather Skylord Baako before he refocused on the task awaiting the pair.

"Simon, we've got loads of ingredients to get." Xephos said to a very overstuffed Honeydew as the spaceman began explaining the Skylord's plan. "We'll need the golden apples for starters. Lysander said that we could get those at er…Granny Bacon's Tea and um…Whoopie Parlor and the other one from the Father. And the rest…" the spaceman said pausing as he took a list of the supplies out of his breast pocket rolling it out on the table for him and the Dwarf to read. "we need gunpowder which we can get from Mr. Astley, Lysander said he's a vendor… and you've got the bottle from the pool of um…Memory." Honeydew laughed, finally polishing off his plate.

"Have you still got that bottle?" Xephos asked inquisitively.

"Er- yeah. Sort of." Honeydew replied as he pulled out a leather pouch, which bulged at the bottom with the required water.

"Excellent." Xephos smiled. Honeydew just grunted shoving the leather pouch back into his pack, which he had set aside near the table.

"Right time to go then?" Honeydew asked setting down his fork on the now completely empty plate. Xephos stared at the Dwarf for a moment,

"How'd you eat all that…that fast?" he asked incredulously. Honeydew shrugged wiping his beard with a napkin.

"I was hungry." Xephos laughed, the only thing he inhales faster is beer he thought mildly. "Well-er I was…pretty-er fairly hungry…" Honeydew protested over the spaceman's laughter. Suddenly the front door burst open at this moment to admit a tall blond man with a bow and quiver slung over his back, it was Martin.

"Hello Martin!" Xephos called to the bowman. Martin smiled at the recognition striding inside the Elysium. "Hello mate. Blimey it's hot in here you know…" Martin said clearly feeling the waves of heat emitting from the giant fireplace to his right.

"Oh er-that's the …dryer I think." Honeydew explained motioning to the enormous fireplace, where the Dwarf's clothes were strung up.

"No bloody kidding it's like a desert in here." Martin said wiping his brow. Xephos laughed.

"Did Lysander send you here?" the spaceman asked formally.

"Yea hero says I'm supposed to guide you two around our fabulous city." Martin explained, "So what in the name of Notch's saggiest left trouser leg are you waiting for? I haven't got all day."

"Well we er- just had breakfast so we can go." Honeydew said standing up causing his chair to fall over with a loud clatter. "Oh er-sorry about the chair…" the Dwarf said apologetically bending over to turn the chair upright.

"You're a Skylord?" Martin's face turned to a look of utter surprise as he stared at the Skylord uniform the Dwarf was wearing.

"Skylord Jankle SIR! At yeh service!" Honeydew said indignantly. Martin laughed at Honeydew's comical attempt at Lysander's deep, businesslike voice.

"He has a Skylord license from Lysander, for um just today." Xephos explained.

"Ohh right…why are you a Skylord for only one day anyway?" Martin asked curiously "I mean it's not some big secret is it? Or is this the official business of heroes?"

"Yeah, it is!" Honeydew shot back hotly throwing slinging his pack over his back.

"They're the only clothes that er fit him well… apparently." Xephos said. Martin laughed but wilted slightly under the Dwarf's glare. "Alright heroes, where do you need to go?"

"Granny Bacon's Tea and Whoopie Parlor." Xephos said.

"Follow me heroes!" Martin said as he strode out the door with the two heroes in tow.

"Thanks for the breakfast!" Honeydew called patting his stomach in obvious appreciation of the meal.

"Yeah, thanks!" Xephos called with a wave of his hand to the butler who was collecting the dirty plates and cups from the table; with that they were gone and into the morning of Mistral.

Throughout the winding and twisting streets of Mistral, Martin kept up a constant stream of conversation which as he insisted was for the heroes' own benefit. For example Martin pointed out many of the important buildings and structures to the heroes.

"Yea and that's the Opium Den, don't want to go in there mates Skylord Jasper runs that place." Martin said pointing to a dingy, low hanging wooden structure not unlike many of the pubs the two had passed by except for a very ornate sign on its front.

The Godly Puff Tavern – A Skylord Jasper & Co. Branch

"The Godly Puff?" Honeydew asked chuckling. Martin shot the Dwarf a glance.

"Be warned Dwarf, it's only a funny place in the name. Skylord Jasper…might not take kindly to your presence. He is very powerful heroes…" Martin said darkly before brightening considerably at the next building "Yea! Here it is heroes…excellent." The bowman smiled brightly. The pair looked up ahead of them to see what Martin was gesturing to. In fancy letters written clearly by someone with a great deal of practice at cursive was the following:

Granny Bacon's Tea &Whoopie Parlor.

All with Kindness, Consideration and Manners Welcome.

"Excellent! I could do with a bit of tea." Xephos said pleasantly. Martin smiled,

"Come heroes, welcome to the best shop in Mistral!"

Martin as it turned out had not lied in the least about Granny Bacon's shop being the best in Mistral. The interior of the place was crowded with people, it was a cozy place and fireplaces lit the shop in multiple places along the walls. As Martin led the way the heroes caught glimpses of the rest of the shop, on one table there were three mustached men playing dice and on another four people were in the midst of a game of pool. Occasionally someone would nod towards Martin and the Bowman would greet them enthusiastically.

"Morning Martin, bit late for you isn't it?" a big burly man with knarled hands called out to the Bowman.

"Oh it never is Evan, the food's too good here you know." Martin said cheerily, the burly man laughed giving the table he was sitting at a funny shake. Martin was not the only one who attracted attention; the two heroes got a great deal of attention from the customers as well. One man in funny goggles gave the Dwarf a very odd stare that completely unnerved him.

"That one's a Skylord. The goggles." Martin whispered to the Dwarf who was not at all eased by this revelation.

At another table was a woman in a fine purple robe cutting up a golden apple on a silver tray. A Golden Apple! Xephos thought excitedly. The spaceman had to fight the urge to bound over to the woman and seize the apple from her now glistening fingers.

"Hello Miss Bacon!" Martin greeted the large lady currently wiping a beer class with a towel behind the bar. The woman smiled at the greeting as she looked up at the bowman and waved a greeting.

Honeydew's breath momentarily stopped at the sight of Granny Bacon. She was short, for a human and roughly the same height as the Dwarf himself. Granny Bacon's hair was long, graying and somewhat curly her wrinkles were few. She also possessed a kind, warm, sort of 'womanly' smile as the Dwarf had noticed at her greeting.

"Hello Granny!" the Dwarf said with a wave of his hand.

"Why hellooo there!" Granny greeted the Dwarf kindly setting aside her knife. "My oh my Martin, are these some friends of yours?" she asked curiously. Martin smiled courteously at the question although he was clearly embarrassed at having his hero companions referred too as 'friends'.

"Yea Granny, they are my companions and they're taking a tour with me of the city. I just thought to myself – well why not take them to the best place in Mistral? Here!" Martin explained cheerily. Granny blushed at the compliment,

"Oh you're such a dear Martin."

The old lady smiled leaning over giving the Bowman's cheek a light peck. Xephos nearly laughed at this but managed to constrain himself to an amused smile.

"Now, what can I do for you dears?" Granny asked kindly turning away from a very embarrassed Martin who was lightly rubbing the spot where Granny had kissed him.

"Er-" Xephos said uncertainly "can we have a look at the Menu?" Granny looked at the spaceman sternly at this request. _What did I say?_ The Spaceman thought awkwardly.

"Say please!" a voice hissed in his ear nearly making the spaceman jump.

"Oh yeah um- may we have a look at the menu _please_?" the spaceman asked as politely as he could. Granny's expression immediately softened at the revised request.

"Of course young man!" she beamed at him, for a moment she disappeared under the counter before appearing a second later with two thin scrolls of paper, one in each hand. Beaming, Granny handed one to each of the heroes, _this must be the menu then…_ Xephos thought giving thanks as he received the scroll. "Just let me know what you want when you're through looking. Okay dears?" Granny instructed giving them a wave that clearly suggested that it was time for them to take their seats.

"Thank you!" Honeydew said giving Granny what he thought was his best Dwarven smile. Granny gave another little wave and disappeared under a mound of dishes.

"Er-right yea, where do you want to sit?" Martin asked as the three turned to face the seating situation. It was a very legitimate question; the situation of the tables showed very clearly that their arrangement had involved little to no planning.

"There's a spot! Yeah over there!" Honeydew pointed towards a small dusty looking table with three rather rickety chairs surrounding it in the far corner of the maze. Martin took the lead at once guiding the companions haphazardly through the maze of tables, chairs, packs, and people. Xephos could not have counted on both hands how many times he ended up apologizing for nearly knocking something over or bumping into someone on his way to their table.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity of navigating the maze of tables and chair-legs, the three companions made their way to the table. Xephos took special care not to sit with his sword poking him in any way as the spaceman well remembered the previous incident with the tree. Having situated himself the spaceman laid out his menu on the table and scanned it for any trace of a golden apple.

"Eight diamonds?!" Xephos said weakly as he came across 'Golden Apple' listed under 'Delicacies' on the menu.

"Eight diamonds?!" Honeydew exclaimed coming across the apple at the same moment as the spaceman. "Do they accept coupons here by any chance?" the Dwarf asked looking unhappily at the small black "8Dia." listed next to the gold apple on the menu. Martin laughed at the Dwarf's query.

"No, Dwarf not for those at least. In fact- I don't even think it's coupon week." Martin explained.

"Coupon week?"

"Maybe I could persuade her to lower the price…a little, you know for me." Honeydew muttered.

"Turn on the old Dwarven charm eh?" Martin smirked.

Unfortunately, the three were forced to discontinue their plans to gain a golden apple off Granny as a waitress came by asking for their orders.

"I'll have the lamb chops please." Honeydew said handing his menu to a very compliant waitress. "And maybe some bacon, a little bit of cheese, a steak, a few porkchops, perhaps a little eggs…"

"Simon." Xephos interrupted.

"Just the bacon." Honeydew said. The waitress laughed.

"And that is your final order?"

"It is!" Xephos said before Honeydew could reply.

"And for you dear?" she asked looking at Martin.

"A steak with sauce thanks." Martin said also passing his menu to the waitress.

"And you?"

"Oh! Um…" Xephos scanned the menu rapidly feeling the eyes of the waitress upon him, which obviously said that she was in a hurry and he was holding her up! "Just some tea thanks." The spaceman said hurriedly, giving the waitress his menu.

"Thank you!" the waitress beamed balancing the menus in one hand, the orders in another as she sped off into the maze of tables to collect more orders from other customers.

"You're only getting tea? The roasted squid is fantastic here you know." Martin said giving the spaceman a slightly puzzled look as to why on earth he wouldn't have immediately chosen roasted squid over all else.

"Roasted…excuse me?" Xephos asked bemusedly.

"Roasted squid mate! It's delicious! Loaded with protein, plenty of vitamin K too…" Martin explained dreamily.

"Uh...I'm not very hungry that's all." Xephos explained cutting across Martin who had now launched into a fantasy about eating Pigs Feet. The spaceman had no desire at all to hear any more about the Bowman's unusual tastes in food.

"Your loss then." Martin shrugged "So what's the plan then heroes?" the Bowman asked leaning onto the table looking curiously at the two.

"Er- what plan?" Honeydew asked conspicuously. Martin sighed, "How are you going to get eight diamonds?

"The Dwarven charm thing right? Negotiate the price down a bit?" Xephos asked.

"Like, to zero?"

"Yeah, yeah I was thinking something like that." Xephos agreed with a smile. "Actually…yeah why don't we ask her now?"

"Now? We haven't even gotten our food yet!" Honeydew whined.

"You had a two course breakfast already!"  
"Yeah, it was only two courses!"  
"Only two!" Xephos exclaimed. Martin laughed at this,

"You can ask her, see how it works out and then we can eat."

"That works." Honeydew agreed.

"Alright, but we'll come, for moral support you know." Xephos added giving the Dwarf a friendly pat on the back.

"Me as well heroes!" Martin said getting up, kicking his chair out of the way. "You know, to guide you through _this_ mess." The Bowmain explained gesturing to the maze of chairs ahead of them leading up to the bar. _It's settled then, I just hope Simon can negotiate that price loads lower than eight diamonds!_ Xephos thought hopefully as the three approached the bar where Granny was, this time taking an enormous platter of brownies from an enormous furnace.

"Granny!" Martin waved. The old woman whirled around narrowly dropping the brownies before relief filled her eyes upon noticing the bowman.

"Heavens to Betsy Martin! You could have given me a moments warning before shouting out like that dear!" Granny exclaimed setting the brownies safely on a stone platter, giving the Bowman a reproachful look.

"Sorry Granny…" The Bowman murmured. Granny smiled clearly accepting the apology turning towards the two heroes a pleasant smile on her wrinkled face. "Ah, you're back! Well aren't you two dears." Granny said flashing another kindly smile. "What can I do for you?"

"Old woman!" Honeydew growled gently "We require a cheaper price for the golden apple!"

"Ohhh…I'm afraid I couldn't dear…they're so rare." Granny pouted.

"You couldn't go any cheaper? Not even for me?" The Dwarf asked giving Granny a slight, suggestive wink. _Oh goodness._ Xephos thought fighting hard to suppress a laugh.

"I don't know…" Granny said uncertainly. "Why a big strong Dwarf like yourself, you could have them out in minutes!" the old woman said graciously. "And you're a Skylord to boot! Surely you already have the necessary funds?"

"Well..." Honeydew said scratching his beard thoughtfully "we need the gold apple to save a friend of ours, the magical powers it possesses are the only thing that can save him. As for the funds, my ship crashed recently the Celeno, you may have heard of it m'lady? Everything I had on that ship has tied up all my funds trying to replace them!"

"Oh yes…most un fortunate, good Skylord Naboth told me over breakfast this morning!" Granny said giving Honeydew a pitying look. "But who told you about the apple's magical powers?" the old woman said giving the Dwarf a look of keen interest.

"The wizard Fumblemore." Honeydew replied.

"Oh! Old Walter Fumblemore? Oh we do go far back…" Granny blurted at once "well for you dear I could go to seven! Your cause does seem most grievous…and what an unfortunate crash…" the old woman said sympathetically.

"You're too kind." Honeydew smiled. _No, Simon! we…don't…have…seven…diamonds!_ Xephos thought unhappily. "You couldn't go any lower than seven?"

"I'm afraid not dear." Granny said sadly "They are ever so rare!"

"Ohhh…." Honeydew said "Alright then, seven diamonds it is." Granny smiled cheerfully at the Dwarf's capitulation. "Thank you Granny." The Dwarf said leaning over the bar and pecking the old lady on the cheek.

"No trouble at all dear!" Granny blushed, her cheeks turning a distinctive red hue.

"Yea, um Granny?" Xephos piped up as the Dwarf leaned over again towards Granny in the motion of another kiss. _I can't witness that again…_ Xephos thought mildly barely able to contain his mirth. "Do you know where we might find seven diamonds?" Granny looked towards the spaceman in surprise at the request nearly bumping into the bent over Dwarf as she did so causing them both to cry out in surprise.

"Ohh! I'm all a dither- well now dear, if I could tell you that I'd be putting myself out of business with such information!" Granny said wagging her finger at the spaceman. Xephos' heart sank into his stomach at her statement. _Brilliant, where are we going to get all those diamonds?_ The spaceman thought hopelessly.

Suddenly a little girlish squeal brought the spaceman back to his senses. Honeydew was inhaling a bowl of whipped cream, pausing every short while to give Granny a creamy kiss on the cheek.

"You really shouldn't you naughty boy!" Granny squealed as Honeydew leaned in for another kiss.

"Um…Simon? Simon!" Xephos said loudly, "SIMON!"

"Dwarf!OI!" Martin called putting an arm on the Dwarf's shoulder.

"Ohh-wha? Oh yeah…er hi." Honeydew said awkwardly looking extremely awkward with his arm around Granny, their faces smeared with white cream.

"Here." Martin said grinning as he took out a brown handkerchief from his pocket handing it to the Dwarf.

"Huh?" Honeydew said staring at the handkerchief, in response Martin motioned to the Dwarf's face and made a wiping motion.

"Oh…yeah..right." Honeydew grunted reluctantly letting go of Granny whose face was now completely red. "Um…well thanks for the deal Granny." Honeydew shrugged. Granny just smiled, the cream on her face giving her a ghostly appearance. "No trouble at all dear." She said "Now then…" the old woman bent over and with a final wave disappeared from the bar, the tin of the forgotten brownies in hand.

For several moments after Granny's disappearance there was complete silence, most people in the place were staring at the Dwarf whose face was turning a beet red. Taking his cue from Martin, the Dwarf took the handkerchief to his face wiping the cream from his beard.

"You there!" a voice barked breaking up the silence. It was not a friendly tone of voice Xephos noticed as the spaceman turned looking for its source. The spaceman's heart nearly stopped when he saw who it was. It was the Skylord who had been giving the Dwarf odd looks from before, when they had first entered the shop. He was a tall, balding man with a black mustache and a very angry expression and he was heading right for the Dwarf.

"Simon…" Xephos whispered to the Dwarf as the Skylord drew closer.

"Heroes….Heroes! Dwarf!" Martin whispered urgently to an unresponsive Honeydew. "We've got to get out of here. That's Skylord Jasper, he'll flay you alive!" at the word flay Honeydew seemed to have attained new life.

"H-he w-w-will?" Honeydew asked.

"Yes!" Martin said giving the Dwarf's sleeve a tug "We must leave, now! Through the side exit!"

"A disgrace to the Skylords!" the voice bellowed, heightening the panic the three felt.

"R-right!" Honeydew exclaimed in a scared voice, the Skylord was almost upon them. Suddenly, with speed that Xephos had almost never seen before the Dwarf sped off to the right, the Bowman in the lead. Taking his cue, the spaceman hurried after them as he too could clearly see that nothing good was to come from the infuriated Skylord's mouth.

"This will not be the end! Do not come back here… I will be watching for you!" the Skylord bellowed pointing at the fleeing trio. _He's a bit angry isn't he?_ Xephos thought as the three reached the door and burst out the side exit into the street. The three were panting as they paused briefly to catch their breath from their narrow escape from the infuriated Skylord.

"Who…was that?" Xephos asked panting slightly. Honeydew nodded in agreement, although the Dwarf was currently rendered mute the question was mutual.

"So I guess we're not getting that brunch huh?" Honeydew said sourly.

"Questions later mate… and yeah I guess not." Martin said giving a worried look at the side door as if it might burst open at any moment. "Right now…we've got to merge with the crowd heroes. Where was it you said you needed to go next?" the Bowman asked brushing his long blond hair out of his eyes.

"The Church of the Holy Apple!" Xephos recalled.

"Alright! Follow me heroes!" Martin called as the three set off from Granny's parlor and back onto the crowded streets of Mistral following Martin's navigation of the streets to their second stop, the Church of the Holy Apple. The three had barely been on the streets for twenty minutes before a church bell could be heard ringing in the distance. Suddenly, between the outcrops of two neighboring taverns the white and gray steeple of the church appeared.

"Excellent! That's the bell for the end of midafternoon service heroes, we'd better hurry or we might not catch Father Braeburn!" Martin exclaimed hurrying forwards, taking great care to sidestep two large drunken monks who had just passed by. Small streams of people were leaving the church as the heroes reached the entrance. The three waited several minutes for the remaining worshippers and the altar boys to depart before the reverend himself appeared wearing extremely stylish sunglasses.

Martin grinned at his appearance "Hello Father!" he said brightly.

"Ah! Martin, good to see you my son!" Braeburn greeted the bowman cheerfully. "And welcome back heroes! Come for mass? You're a bit late I'm afraid…perhaps you'd like to taste some of my spare sacramental wine? Braeburn said peeking briefly into the church interior as if to check that it was indeed void of all worshippers.

"Well er- not that actually Father." Xephos explained.

"You have extra sacramental wine-?" Honeydew started but was cut off by Martin.

"The heroes aren't here for mass – although maybe some sacramental wine-" Martin said with a sly smile.

"Yeah – we're back for the Holy Apple Father. We want to make a deal for it." Xephos said as politely as possible although he knew that Braeburn would take any proposal for the bartering of the sacred Apple very seriously.

"Yes…" Braeburn said slowly his eyes narrowing "I've thought a great deal about your proposal heroes for the er… apple. I'll make a deal with you for it but you must give me something of great value in return."

"Like what?" the three asked at once.

"Well heroes, I'm all about the beat. I've thought for some time about it and I have to admit this apple business is getting very old fashioned these days." Braeburn confessed.

"You should start a church of song!" Honeydew suggested. Braeburn's face brightened immediately at the suggestion. "Yes! You understand me completely Dwarf friend!" the reverend exclaimed his face breaking into a wide smile. "You see heroes, that's precisely what I intend to do! You give me a record – a golden record mind, and I will give you this!" Braeburn said with a flourish pulling the gleaming gold apple – which had obviously been recently polished – out of his pocket.

"Any particular preference?" Martin queried.

"Oh yes!" Braeburn exclaimed with another smile "The Presley record of course!"

 _Where the devil are we going to get that?_ Xephos thought helplessly.

"Yes I'm all about the beat now!" Father Braeburn said proudly, tucking the Holy Apple back into his priestly robes. "Well forgive me heroes but I'm hearing confessions in a few minutes. Perhaps you have something you want to get off your chest?" Xephos laughed at the offer,

"No thanks Father!"

"Yeah we've got enough to do, getting the record and everything." Honeydew grunted.

"Well, Notch protect you heroes!" Braeburn said with a wave and with that the Reverend turned away and disappeared humming a merry tune on his way.

"Well, that settles it, but where are we going to find a gold record anyway?" Honeydew asked turning to his two companions. Xephos scratched the back of his head thoughtfully _hadn't Eli said something about it? No, he didn't that's right…_ Eli had not told them where to get a record, only that Father Braeburn was a big music fan, a fact they knew already.

"There is one place we might find a Presley record hero." Martin started "From Skylord Jasper, he's an avid music fan."

"Eh? Who?" Honeydew asked tossing _The Hymns of Braeburn_ back onto a nearby pew.

"Skylord Jasper…yeah he's the bloke who chased you out of Granny's place hero." Martin said unhappily.

"T-That's Skylord Jasper?" Honeydew asked, his face aghast.

"Aye hero," Martin said sadly. _This quest gets better all the time_ … Xephos thought with a touch of irony, crossing his arms in a visible expression of his annoyance.

"How are we going to get the record from him?" Xephos asked, after all any possibility of approaching the Skylord had been wasted after the incident with Granny Bacon. Martin's eyes gave a dangerous twinkle at this proposal.

"You'll have to steal it of course." He said simply. Steal it? Xephos thought, drastic times called for drastic measures and the spaceman was prepared to do it if he had to.

"Tonight." Xephos replied "But you'll have to show us the way." Martin nodded "Yea hero," Honeydew looked sick to his stomach at the proposal.

"Alright…. Let's finish this then! We're going to Astley's place right?" the Dwarf said in a slightly high-pitched voice.

"Are you alright Simon?" Xephos asked with a look of mild worry at the Dwarf. Honeydew's voice was at least three octaves too high than it normally was.

"Yeah I'm fine." Xephos and Martin looked at the Dwarf disbelievingly.

"You sure you're alright Dwarf?" Martin asked "I mean if it's the Skylord you're worried about its fine. Do you really think he's going to find us in this crowd?"

"Er- probably not." Honeydew replied scratching his head.

"Well c'mon then heroes, we better get going because the crowd's only going to get worse you know." Martin explained. That was, as it turned out, all it took to get Honeydew moving as the crowd was already quite thick (even the buildings across the street were hard to see through the crowd) and the Dwarf's chances of being found by the angered Skylord were significantly lower in the crowd than anywhere else.

Martin navigated the streets of Mistral skillfully, but by any standard, the trio's progress through the crowds was quite slow. The spaceman was utterly baffled by just how many people there were in the city. Even yesterday, his first day in the city there had not been nearly so many people.

"Hey Martin!" Xephos called out – he had to yell else Martin wouldn't have been able to hear him over the crowds.

"Yea hero?" the Bowman replied glancing back at the spaceman.

"Where are all these people coming from? There's more of them here than yesterday!" the spaceman exclaimed exasperatedly.

"Maybe they're all here for the food?" Honeydew suggested. _That might just explain part of it_ Xephos thought mildly.

Martin laughed "That might just be part of it heroes, you see today is the seventh day of Market Week!"

"Er- I thought it was only Market Day?" Xephos asked confusedly. Martin laughed again "Yea it was, just there's seven." The bowman smiled.

"It's always a holiday…" Honeydew grumbled as he pushed past a tall man in a dark cloak. The man cried out in surprise. "Beware the one who pushes away others in his path!" the man cried suddenly giving the Dwarf a quick haunted gaze, and with that he was gone, muttering something about pigs feet and glowing white eyes.

"What- who was that?" Honeydew asked amusedly.

"He didn't look quite right did he?" the spaceman agreed. There were lots of strange people in the city, _not to mention thatweird bloke in the black cloak_ Xephos thought, recalling his encounter with the short little man who had told the spaceman off the day before.

"There's plenty of…people like that heroes. Apparently they're followers of Herobrine, some kind of minor deity or something." Martin explained, throwing a look of annoyance at the rapidly disappearing black- cloaked figure. _Herobrine huh?_ Xephos thought _wonder where we've heard that name before…_

"This way heroes!" Martin directed towards a section of rather squat buildings that had all been squashed together with one another. The section had clearly been poorly designed, as if by a drunk architect as the houses had practically been built together with no regard for space or sanitation. It was very clearly as Xephos could tell, the poorer south side of Mistral as the crowd too had changed to a kind of poorer sort. Many of the people were dressed poorly; one woman was dressed in a ragged blouse and was begging on the street corner for food. Xephos was stunned by the sight having never seen such poverty way out in the wilderness where the cave was.

"Simon, d'you see that?" Xephos said to his Dwarven companion, gesturing towards the destitute woman.

"Yeah…" the Dwarf said gazing at a well bosomed woman in a large green and brown dress near the streeet corner. "Simon!" Xephos hissed.

"What? Oh er- her?" Honeydew's face reddened in embarrassment. "What-we should help her mate."

"Martin!" Xephos called to their guide ahead of them "Martin!"

"Hero?" the bowman looked back at him "Something wrong?"

"Yeah did you see her? That woman over there – she looks bad…" Xephos said gesturing to the woman who was now sitting against the wall of a nearby building brushing her filthy hair out of her eyes.

"Yea hero I did. She can't be helped." Martin sighed sadly.

"But-" Honeydew and Xephos protested at once.

"Heroes." Martin said calmly, putting a hand on Xephos' shoulder "I know you both mean to do good. After all you saved Terrorvale from complete destruction! But you've got to understand some things cannot be helped at least not right now. I mean, we can come and help her later, she's always at roughly…the same place every day."

"Haven't you helped her then?" Honeydew asked rashly.

"Yes hero…" Martin said calmly "I bring her food when she doesn't have any. See? There someone gave her some bread." Martin gestured to the woman who was now holding a wam loaf of bread covetously in her thin arms. "Come heroes, there are many more people even worse off than she is." And with that the bowman led the two heroes away, down the crowded street through the throng of poor. Xephos felt sick to his stomach as he passed by the beggars in the street. He looked at Martin from time to time, the Bowman was friendly, kind, and strong but he almost acted as if the beggars were invisible to him. _Is this how all the people in Mistral act? Maybe that's how it is in the city…_ Xephos thought sadly.

"Yea, here we are!" Martin pushed his way through the crowd and stepped onto the cobblestone landing of a squat building covered lightly in black powder.

"Oh thank goodness!" Xephos exclaimed pulling himself away from the throng of people. The body odors had gotten increasingly on the spaceman's nerves. Xephos breathed deeply as he took in the fresh air above the bustling crowd below the landing.

"The Astley Residence." Honeydew read, peering at the sign near the doorway. "Mr. Astley – Certified Gunpowder Vendor."

"Well after you heroes, he's open as far as I know…" Martin mused as the bowman reached for the door handle. "It's open." The bowman smiled as he turned the handle and the door creaked open.

"Mr. Astley? Hello?" Martin called into the interior of the vendor's shop. It was dark and covered with gunpowder, Mr. Astley wasn't there either.

"D'you reckon it's closed?" Xephos asked curiously. "I mean there's no one in there and its all dark…"

"Maybe? Maybe Mr. Astley has night vision so he night looks the same as day to him." Honeydew piped up. Martin laughed at this. "No really!" the Dwarf said defensively "It's true! If you sit in the dark for long enough then you can see in the dark."

Martin and the spaceman laughed at this "Who told you that anyway?" Xephos asked with a smirk.

"Er– my Gran, IT'S A TRUE STORY!" the Dwarf exclaimed crossly at the looks from Martin and the spaceman.

"Alright well, let's see if Astley's in." Xephos suggested repressing a chuckle. The other two companions nodded in agreement and they went – single file (Honeydew was too wide) into the gunpowder store.

"Mr. Astley? Helloooo? Anyone there?" Honeydew called nervously. There was no answer.

"Guess he doesn't get around to house cleaning much does he?" Martin murmured as the bowman brushed his hand on a nearby table. An entire layer of dust coated the Bowman's hand at once, which Martin was now brushing off on his jerkin.

The Astley residence was indeed very dark with light hitting a couple large powder barrels behind a counter from a window near the ceiling. The spaceman couldn't see a thing and neither could anyone else as was apparent from how much they kept bumping into knocked over chairs and other bits of rubble that littered the floor.

"This rubble…it's like a bunch of explosions have taken place here…" Xephos said as he narrowly avoided stubbing his toe on a large chuck of brick near a table leg. _Where's the gunpowder?_ The spaceman thought as he inched carefully over to the barrels. _Oh brilliant, I can't see anything! Like on that bridge!_

"Martin? Do you have any torches?" Xephos called over to the shape of the bowman.

"Yeah hero. It might be too risky though, all this powder – could be dangerous." Martin surmised. "But I do have a red-stone torch, not _nearly_ as combustible mate."

"Yeah, if we could get some lighting that'd be great." Honeydew grumbled. Seconds passed, and nobody moved as the sound of the Bowman striking the torch was heard and suddenly the room was illuminated in a dim red glow.

"Well nothing's exploded so it works!" Martin smiled, his face emitting a ruddy glow in the red light.

"Brilliant!" Xephos exclaimed as Martin walked carefully over to the spaceman, handing him the torch _. Let's see_ Xephos thought as the spaceman bended over the barrels, _gunpowder! This is perfect!_

"Oh gods…" Honeydew whispered interrupting the spaceman's train of thought, "Xephos, look!" Xephos turned to where the Dwarf was pointing, near the door. The Dwarf's face had gone completely white; he was in a state of panic. Martin too was rooted to the spot. Holding the torch up into the gloom the source of the panic was clearly revealed. It was a Creeper. _So that's where the explosions are coming from...the markings on the floor…this is a Creeper's den!_

Suddenly the Creeper opened its mouth and began to speak in a slow snakelike voice, "Good….eeeeveniiiinnngg….ssss..I am….Mr. Asssstleey…."

With almost no thought, Xephos reached for his sword, while Honeydew reached for the axe. As Mr. Astley drew closer the spaceman wasn't sure but it seemed that Astley was getting larger. The spaceman was sure of only one thing though; they needed to get out of there _with no time to waste!_

Rushing forward Xephos drew his sword and slashed in an arc at the creeper in one fluid motion, taking care to stay at least three paces away from it.

"Sssss!" Astley hissed as he was knocked backwards by the spaceman's blow.

"Watch yourself hero!" Martin called out. Xephos took the Bowman's warning as he dived to the side just barely avoiding Martin's arrow which found its mark squarely in Astley's greenish flesh. The creeper let out a horrible hissing sound at the attack. However, instead of slowing the Creeper down Astley seemed to get even angrier and larger as Xephos noticed the seemingly increasing size of the Creeper.

"He's gonna blow!" Honeydew cried as the Creeper rushed forwards to the trio, growing larger every second.

"Watch out heroes!" Martin bellowed as the bowman shot another arrow at Astley before diving under a nearby table. Xephos took the bowman's cue as he too jumped to the side over a pile of nearby rubble, out of Astley's path. Xephos got out of the way just in time as a loud explosion threw him against the wall and the world went dark.

 **A/N: Is Xephos okay? And what happened to Peculier at the beginning? Is it a mad vision from the taint or is it something real? Wait until Chapter 8 to find out!**


	7. The Inquiry

**SOI Chapter 7: The Inquiry**

 **A/N: Hey guys I'm back with another edited chapter of the Shadow of Israphel! Read this chapter carefully. Some interesting stuff happens near the end ;)**

 **I know the pacing of this story is a little on the slow side. Don't worry; we'll be picking up the pace by the next chapter, which WILL cover the incident at Jasper's place.**

"Well…on the plus side at least we've got the gunpowder now." A voice muttered. The spaceman's eyes slowly fluttered open as he searched for the source of the voice. The world had returned.

"Hey! Welcome back hero! How's your head feeling?" A friendly voice called cheerily. It was familiar, _Martin?_ Xephos wondered momentarily _oh yeah…the quest_.

"Martin?" Xephos called groggily.

"Yea hero, thank Notch you're okay, nearly reckoned you were done for a moment." Martin said cheerfully. "You head doing alright? Not got a dent in it or anything? It looked like you had a bit of a fall."

"Yeah well I'm still here…mostly…" Xephos muttered rubbing the back of his head. At least his head wasn't dented anywhere. Good, he didn't want to spend the rest of his lfie looking funny. Even so, the spaceman had a terrible pain in his back. Slowly he reached behind his shoulder and removed a small chunk of rubble and tossed it to the other side of the room.

"Did you know you've been unconscious for 'round twenty minutes or so." Martin asked as he brushed his mess of hair aside with a flick of his wrist.

"No I didn't…It could have been better. " _It would've been a bit more pleasant if I wasn't lying on a load of rubble the entire time!_ Xephos thought with a flash of irritation. If there was one thing the spaceman couldn't stand, it was being perpetually uncomfortable. _Where's my sword?_ Xephos realized that the weapon was neither in his hand nor in his carefully crafted scabbard. The spaceman searched blindly for a moment before finally locating the diamond blade lying a foot from him. Careful to avoid another accident akin to the incident in Mirkwood, Xephos grabbed his sword by the pommel and sheathed it quickly.

Eager to relieve himself of the stony bed upon which he had lain for twenty minutes after the explosion Xephos stood up slowly, glancing around the shop surveying the scene. The shop made Lysander's Elysium appear neat and organized in Xephos' opinion. The demise of Mr. Astley had left its mark, a chunk of stone was missing near the doorway and part of the ceiling had been blasted out as well, leaving a weak winter light to dimly illuminate the place.

"So that was Mr. Astley? _That creeper_?" Xephos was still in utter disbelief at what he had just occurred. _I didn't know Creepers could talk…_

"Yeah Mr. Astley's a bloody creeper, and yeah…we killed him." Honeydew chuckled. "Funny thing is I don't feel that sorry that he's gone."

"Well it's not like you really knew him." Martin interjected.

"Would you want to get to know a _creeper_?"

"Hang on, do you reckon Lysander knew Mr. Astley was a creeper? I saw him and his butler, they seemed to know something…" Xephos said with a flash of irritation. _That could have killed us!_

"Dunno pal. But we got the gunpowder right? I mean look at all this!" Honeydew laughed as he tied a string around a sack which, judging by the large bulge in it contained a massive amount of gunpowder.

"Yeah I mean that's brilliant and everything," Xephos said "but what if that had killed us?"

"Not a chance. We're bloody heroes aren't we?" Honeydew laughed. Xephos dropped it, he was inclined to agree with the dwarf on that one.

"So," Martin spoke up, brushing some dust off his hands "Where too next heroes?"

"Eh- feels like we've had enough adventure for today you know." Honeydew said. It was a statement Xephos found himself nodding furiously in agreement with. _Yeah, one creeper's enough for today thanks._ He thought sarcastically.

"I'm going to kill Lysander when we get back… _Mr. Astley is a vendor for gunpowder!"_ Honeydew said doing a fair imitation of the Skylord's baritone voice. Xephos and Martin laughed but Martin's expression became serious a moment later.

"We'd better clean up heroes. Don't want to arose suspicion you know." _Right,_ Xephos thought _because no one heard the loud Creeper explosion._ "And don't worry about the explosion hero." Martin said reading the spaceman's mind "It's alright, everyone thinks its Fumblemore anyway."

"Dammit Fumblemore!" Said Honeydew with a laugh. "So…anyone fancy a drink?" the dwarf asked giving his large belly a pat.

"Yeah. We could plan strategy there." Xephos suggested.

"Well heroes…I know a good place down the street from here, a little shady but pretty decent ale."

"What time is it anyway? I er- forgot my watch." Xephos asked curiously. _As far as I can tell it should be around one in the afternoon…_

"It's about three hero. The crowds should be thinning out by now you know. It's always a bit crowded in the morning cause that's when Bateaus the Burper's shop is open." Martin informed them with a check of his battered gold watch. _Well that's good news!_ Xephos thought smiling slightly, the spaceman had been way closer than he ever wanted to be to some rather smelly people.

"Bateaus the Buper?" Honeydew guffawed.

"Well actually his name's Mike but everyone calls him that on account of his-"

"We know!"

"Alright, as they say, after me?" Martin said with a grin, "By the way you might want to wipe the dust off your shirt hero," The Bowman said with a gesture at Xephos "no offense but you look like murder."

"It's the gunpowder." Honeydew whispered.

"Oh right-"Xephos said absentmindedly, as he paused to give the front of his shirt a few quick wipes. With that the three left the Astley residence and headed out again into the midafternoon streets of Mistral.

"Alright heroes, what's the plan?" Martin asked expectantly.

"Well we walk into Jasper's house see, and we take the record when no one's looking." Honeydew said, looking very proud of the cleverness of his idea. Martin laughed "Yeah but what about the specifics hero? Oh sorry I mean- _Skylord_."

"Where's Jasper's house located?" Xephos started up. _I mean we ought to at least know where to break into for starters…_

"The center of the city of course!" Martin explained.

"Yeah –um where in the center?" Honeydew asked.

"Somewhere." Martin said unhelpfully. _Yes…very helpful_ Xephos thought, "That could be anywhere!"

"Oi- don't blame me for not knowing, Jasper's a private person."

"Hey Xephos, Xephos, oi- listen!" Honeydew called over Xephos' and Martin's bickering. "D'you reckon Lysander knows where his house is?"

"Oh yeah! Lysander would know!" Xephos smiled. Brilliant! But not a moment later the spaceman realized the problem with this plan. "But Lysander said the inquiry will take all day…"

"So?" Honeydew retorted, "Then we just go in there and tell them to do their stupid inquiry some other day- oi listen, we got a house to rob! _And we still haven't gotten our drinks yet!_ " he finished grumpily, looking over at the counter where waiters were shuffling through carrying trays of dishes.

"Wait – hang on – are you saying what I think you're saying?" Xephos asked.

"'Course I am." Honeydew grunted. "Look at this, two days in and all we've got for that potion is some dirt" the Dwarf tossed a sack of it on the table "and this water!" he said holding the bottle in a clenched fist.

"Well that leaves another problem," Xephos laughed sourly at the irony "we don't know where Lysander's trial is!"

"I might heroes." Martin piped up.

"Ah bloody hell of course you do- wait hang on, you know where it- the- the trial thingy-is?" Honeydew asked with a look of both utter bewilderment and excitement at Martin.

"Yeah hero, the SkyCouncil building not far off from the Ye Olde Towery-"

"Wait- did you say the Ye Olde Towery?" Honeydew guffawed. Martin laughed himself "It means – The Old Tower in the old language." The Bowman explained, to the looks of complete confusion upon the two heroes faces. "Anyway, the building's in the center of the city- the very center heroes. Can't miss it, big white building with airships floating overhead. You saw the airships when you first entered the city right hero?" Martin asked glancing at Xephos, indirectly stating that he was the object of Martin's query.

"Oh yeah- they were pretty cool…" Xephos said affirmatively causing Martin and Honeydew to bark a laugh. "But wait, how do you know where it is?"

"I've been to a few inquiries there. They've got public hearings there once in a while." Martin explained. " And yea everyone thinks the airships are pretty amazing. Don't worry you'll get used to 'em after a couple months. Anyway heroes here's the plan…" Martin said leaning forward on the table, suddenly talking rapidly in a low voice so that none of the other customers might hear him. Martin was talking so fast, (his voice was filled with excitement) that Xephos had to ask him to slow down at several points to grasp what the Bowman was saying. However, after several repeats and dinner- which had been served while Martin was going over the specifics, the three had their plan.

Honeydew would be the first to approach the SkyCouncil building. There he would present himself and show his Skylord license to the guards. After doing so, Honeydew would gain access for Xephos and Martin much the same way Lysander had done for them back on the sky-bridge from Fumblemore's tower. Then all three of them would enter the SkyCouncil building and head for the fourth floor where Lysander's inquiry would most likely be taking place- according to Martin. There, in the SkyCouncil chamber they would nab Lysander and get on with the quest.

"That's a good plan." Xephos admitted once Martin was done and the spaceman had finished downing his glass of malt whiskey – which Honeydew had ordered for all of them.

"Well there's only a fifty – fifty chance of failure, but better than a one hundred percent chance of failure right?" Martin added with a grin.

"Yeah- that's loads better. Really makes me feel confident." Honeydew grunted with a scratch of his neck. "How do we know Lysander's trial – thingy isn't already over?"

"Lysander said it would take most of the day." Xephos said thoughtfully.

"A whole day just going over paperwork?!" Honeydew exclaimed, nearly choking on a piece of chicken he was swallowing "That sounds horrible!" Xephos and Martin laughed at Honeydew's horrified expression.

"Yea hero, I know what you mean. I get this impulse to just let it all go every time I have to file another bloody tax return…" Martin concurred.

Suddenly Honeydew burped loudly, so loudly it caused customers at several other tables to glance at the Dwarf for a moment before returning to their dinners. Clearly, Honeydew had signaled the end of dinner as his plate was polished clean and he was currently smacking his lips, oblivious to his breach of table-manners _. I can just hear Lysander groaning at our table manners_ Xephos thought with a hint of amusement. Their Skylord companion was very highly minded when it came to social rituals.

"So-are we going yet?" Honeydew asked impatiently, looking sadly at his now empty plate.

"Why the hurry hero? Not filled up yet?" Martin asked with a smile as the Bowman drained his glass and pushed his emptied plate aside.

"I am! It's just the thing with food- you eat it and then it's gone…" Xephos and Martin chuckled, by now even the Bowman was well acquainted with Honeydew's huge appetite.

"Well we'd better hurry heroes- nearly five o'clock, it'll be nightfall soon." Martin said, with a brief check of his watch. "Don't want to get caught out at night you know."

"Yeah we know." Xephos and Honeydew said at once. The two heroes were all too well acquainted with the tendency of monsters to spawn in the darkness.

With that, and a special thank you to the cook from Honeydew, the heroes made their way out of _Big Shawn's Breakfast and Evening Bar_ (which was according to Martin, the name of the place) into the streets of Mistral once again. The good news, the spaceman observed was that the crowd had greatly thinned out, even more so from when they had left the Astley residence over an hour earlier. The bad news was the increasing cold and lessening light of the hour. And to make the situation even worse, Xephos had heard several people in the bar mention that it was going to snow sometime in the evening! Xephos drew Lysander's traveling cloak around him tightly shielding himself from the worst of the cold.

Martin led them down the twisting streets of Mistral at a quick pace, thanks largely to the few passerby's that were around. After about thirty minutes or so – the spaceman didn't bother to check his watch- the group had made it to the inner city. This was made increasingly obvious by the pleasant looking buildings and the absence of poor people that were a common sight in the outer city.

Suddenly Martin stopped. Xephos was taken by surprise and nearly bumped into him.

"Behold heroes! The SkyCouncil!" Martin said throwing both his hands in the air at the magnificent, imposing white structure that stood before them.

"Oh crikey!" Xephos exclaimed, staring up at the building. _It's amazing…_ The building easily dwarfed anything in Terrorvale. Even the Sky-Tower with its polished stone structure paled in comparison to the enormous structure ahead of them.

"Wowwww…" Honeydew said staring, almost starry-eyed at the huge building. "So that's the SkyCouncil building thingy- what did you call it?"

"The SkyCouncil Tower hero." Martin replied with a laugh. _I don't care what you call it_ Xephos thought _this is bloody incredible_. The SkyCouncil Tower was a huge white structure with several towers extending high up into the sky from its base. From those towers were ladders, without handrails as far as the spaceman could make out, which led to platforms where several airships were docked. The building itself was perhaps half a mile wide, and looked like it could hold fifty of their caves inside it! The threesome was still almost half a mile from the building but even from such a distance the SkyCouncil Tower spoke of power and accomplishment in its very structure.

"It's like this is from some fairytale." Honeydew murmured as they gradually approached the SkyCouncil Tower.

"Alright hero, got your license?" Martin asked with a glance at Honeydew who was still immersed, staring at the tower. "Oi-hero! Honeydew!"

"Huh? Oh - the license? Yeah I got it somewhere…" Honeydew muttered as the Dwarf took of his pack, and stopped to shuffle through it for a moment. "No…no that's personal…" Xephos heard the Dwarf mutter. _What's personal?_ Xephos thought for a moment, thoughts of some love letter momentarily flooding his mind. "Got it!" Honeydew said waving the license out of his pack with a flourish.

The Dwarf had pulled out his license with perfect timing too as two guards from the SkyCouncil building, both with long-swords around their belts had nearly reached the trio.

"Who approaches the SkyCouncil?" one of the guards asked as they stopped before the trio. The guards were wearing the same blue and green slashed tunic as the bad tempered guard back at the SkyTower. For a brief moment Xephos hoped they wouldn't recognize him and Martin but the fear passed as it was clear the two guards had no idea who they were.

"Skylord –Skylord Jankle and two companions!" the dwarf bellowed importantly.

"Skylord…Jankle? Ever heard of a Skylord Jankle Ned?" one guard with a thick Irish accent asked his companion.

"No- don't reckon I have Jevy. Skylord Jankle eh? Do you have a license?" the second guard asked giving the dwarf a suspicious look.

"Here." The dwarf said simply handing out his Skylord license to the guard. The guard named Ned took it with a gloved hand and stared at it for a moment.

"By Notch! Look at this, a dwarf Skylord! Look at this Jevy." Ned said with a look of complete surprise at the dwarf.

"Yeah…alright Skylord Jankle sir you can go, but who are these companions of yours?" the guard named Jevy asked giving Xephos and Martin a once over. Xephos wasn't sure but it seemed as if Jevy's eyes seemed to linger an unusually long time on Martin. _Please don't let him be the guard from before. Oh gods!_ Xephos thought, his pulse pounding.

"Lewis and Aaron, friends from Icaria." Honeydew said gesturing from Xephos to Honeydew.

"Hey-look at this Jevy! This one's wearing a Skylord's cloak!" Ned exclaimed, as he reached forward and briefly felt the spaceman's cloak with a gloved hand. Xephos jerked back in surprise from the motion.

"It's mine; I gave it to him to keep him warm- from the cold." Honeydew explained. The guard named Jevy gave Honeydew a very long look before nodding slightly. "Alright, you can go." Jevy said taking a step back. "Leave it Ned!" he said with obvious irritation as Ned had been gazing at Lysander's cloak.

Not needing to be told twice the trio moved quickly past the guards along the tree-lined path to the SkyCouncil Tower.

"Nice work heroes." Martin whispered once they were out of earshot of the guards.

"That Ned was a bit creepy." Xephos shivered, clearly remembering the wanting looks Ned had been giving Lysander's cloak. "Does he have a thing for cloaks or something?" the spaceman had to ask.

"Yeah he didn't look quite right did he?" Honeydew agreed.  
"He's a bit off…apparently didn't have very good parents." Martin said dourly. "It's alright he's harmless!"

"Oh? Like Mr. Astley?" Honeydew chortled. Xephos and Martin laughed nervously at this, wary the guards might hear them.

"So let me get this straight, I'm Lewis and Martin's Aaron?" Xephos asked.

"Can mine be Rich instead? Aaron's my brother's name you know." Martin protested.

"Yeah sure." Honeydew replied with a chuckle. "Alright, so…which floor is he on?"

"Who?"  
"Lysander!"

"Oh yeah…" Martin seemed to have been recalled for a dream as he drifted back into reality "Fourth floor heroes, look there's a sign for it!" the Bowman pointed out, motioning to a nearby sign across the hallway. The heroes hadn't realized it for a moment but they had entered the building.

"Oh what? Wowww…" Honeydew exclaimed staring at the glorious surroundings. Xephos was even more amazed by the inside of the SkyCouncil Tower than the outside. _Gods this place is huge!_ The spaceman thought with awe.

The interior of the place was enormous, the floor was made of marble and had obviously been cleaned recently by the way it clearly cast the reflections of the three companions. The ceiling was a high arched dome, adorned with what appeared to be thousands of colored shards of glass, put together in the form of an airship. Along the walls there were portraits of Skylords including an enormous one that seemed to be more important than the others due to its prominent placing.

SKYLORD LYSANDER REDWING – _Founder of the SkyCouncil & High Skylord of Mistral & Icaria._

Lysander Redwing's portrait depicted a large burly man with deep black hair and a bushy mustache. On the top of his face were the signature Skylord goggles and around him were the pictures of airships and divine signs of some kind.

"He looks like Lysander! D'you reckon…?" Honeydew exclaimed, staring in apparent disbelief at the portrait of Lysander Redwing. The man did look a great deal like Lysander.

"What do you think Simon?" Xephos asked with a laugh.

"Well heroes, the staircases are over there, any one of them should take you to the fourth floor." Martin broke in with a cough.

"Let's go!" Xephos smiled as the three companions started for the gigantic staircases that adorned the end of the giant hall.

"Well at least there are some handrails on these…" Honeydew grumbled as the Dwarf trudged slowly up the stairway.

"Thank Notch for that." Martin, and Xephos concurred. The spaceman remembered way too well the group's near death experience in the upper-city. Almost none of the staircases there had handrails; it was almost as if Fumblemore had built the ruddy things himself!

"Hello." a little man greeted them on the first level- which the group reached after a great deal of climbing. The man wore glasses and was even shorter than Honeydew, and could have been a Dwarf save for the lack of a beard.

"Uh…who are you?" Honeydew asked, clearly confused.

"Why I'm a member of the Mistral City Tourist Board!" the little man exclaimed with a little-too-bright smile.

"Er- we weren't planning on buying anything if that's what you mean." Xephos replied.

"No? Ah but sir there's plenty here! Look! All the finest trinkets in Mistral!" the man said opening his coat to reveal lines of pocket watches with little airships engraved on them, along with innumerable little bottles labeled 'Barffulo's Spidereye Brew- Cure for all Ills'. "Surely you cannot resist such tempting brews?" the man asked with a wink.

"Uhhh…" Honeydew stared, completely bemused as to what was going on.  
"OI! How many times have I told your people to stay out? OUT! GET OUT OF HERE!" an angered voice boomed.

"Blimey, someone's angry." Honeydew murmured looking to the next staircase, ignoring the little man who was currently trying to show the Dwarf a potion labeled 'Elixir of Happiness – not for those 21 or Under'. _Elixir of Happiness? Is that alcohol?_ Xephos chuckled but was immediately interrupted by the angry voice from a moment before.

"GET OUT OF HERE! The SkyCouncil is not some blasted hawker's post! OUT!" the source of the voice was now apparent, a tall Skylord had appeared – evident by the goggles the figure wore- with two green and blue sashed guards at his sides at the top of the staircase. The Skylord paused, gave some orders to the guards and with that the guards started down the staircase, spears pointed outwards.

"Now – really. I'm an honest businessman-" the little man started but immediately paled at the sight of the guards coming towards him spears raised. Aware that it was time to leave the man pocketed his bottle of Barffulo's Brew and with a brief wave took his leave, racing down the staircase as fast as his little legs would carry him.

"After him!" the Skylord commanded "Make certain he leaves the building."

"Yes Skylord sir." The guards obeyed as they took off at a faster pace, passing the companions on the landing and down the first stairwell where the little man had disappeared.

"What was that?" Xephos asked utterly confused as to what had just taken place. Who was that little man?

"You three!" a voice commanded. _A voice from above?_ Xephos thought at first _Notch? Oh no…we're not in trouble again are we?_ The spaceman thought as the Skylord made his way down the steps towards the heroes. "Well out with it. Who are you?" the Skylord asked, having reached the landing.

"We're uh-" Honeydew started before Martin cut him across.

"Three companions Skylord. May I present Skylord Jankle?" Martin gestured to Honeydew, giving the Dwarf a brief nudge.

"Oh –er yeah that's me." Honeydew nodded. The unknown Skylord just gave him a disdainful look. " _Skylord_ Jankle? You look like a dwarf to me!"

"Yeah well I'm a bit new…" Honeydew said with a weak grin.

"Hmph. Alright then but who are you traveler? And you?" the Skylord said with an odd look at Xephos "Your shirt is most unusual…where do you hail from?"

"A cave by the sea, but it was destroyed!" Xephos explained truthfully "And I'm Xephos by the way." The spaceman said, dropping his fake name from earlier. In all honesty the spaceman favored his current name a great deal more.

"I'm Martin, a traveler and peddler." Martin explained.

"You three are companions then?" the Skylord asked suspiciously.

"Yes!" they said in unison. "Together, forever in all kinds of weather." Honeydew added under his breath.

"Ah! That's very well then. If you'd been hawkers I'd have tossed the lot of you out. Or for that matter if you were anything except official Skylords or companions of Skylords you'd be running from my guards as we speak!" The Skylord said with what he clearly thought was some attempt at levity. "As for those hawkers…I can't stand those kinds of people, always disrupting business. That man with all the watches- he's been caught here seven times! _Barffulo's Spidereye Brew_ -" the Skylord scoffed "it's actually a draught to induce vomiting!"

"Oh gods! I guess that's where the 'Barf' in Barffulo comes from." The spaceman mused thinking for a moment of what might have happened to him had he taken some of the brew. _Then we'd have two sick people on our hands!_

"Indeed spaceman! I hope he didn't manage to sell any- had to confiscate the lot of it last time and pour it down the toilet…" the Skylord concurred "Anyway, might I inquire what your business may be?"

"Well um- who are you?" Honeydew asked.

"Ah! Yes, yes I must apologize I forgot to introduce myself- I'm Skylord Nathan. Jonathan Wilhelm Nathan if you want to know. Lysander Redwing is my great-great grandfather. Now what is your business at the SkyCouncil?"

As tempted as Xephos was to tell Nathan to sod off the spaceman held his tongue, aware of just how much trouble he could get in if he did. Luckily Martin spoke up just in time, as Honeydew looked far too nervous to do most of the talking himself.

"We have come to see Skylord Lysander. On the fourth floor."

"Lysander? Fourth floor? There's an inquiry going on there at the moment you know. Perhaps you're going to observe? No matter, I can take you there if you wish." Nathan offered.

"Yes, thank you. We accept!" Xephos said forcing what he thought was a thankful smile. Something told him things weren't going to go too well if they didn't do whatever Nathan suggested. With that Nathaniel turned and started up the second level of the staircase. "Follow me!"

"Brilliant, I was getting tired of standing on that bloody landing all day." Martin muttered, Xephos laughed in agreement.

"Alright Simon?" Xephos asked, Honeydew just gave the spaceman a worried look, motioning to the figure of Skylord Nathaniel ahead of them.

"Oh er- I mean _Skylord_."

"Yeah- I'm okay…just a little nervous." Honeydew admitted. "Listen Xephos we've got to get away from this Nathaniel guy or we'll never get a chance to talk to Lysander! I mean think about it, he doesn't believe that I'm really a Skylord." The Dwarf said frantically, doing his best to keep his voice low.

"I don't think there's any way we could really lose him maybe if we did something to him-" Xephos suggested, maybe they could knock the Skylord out, just for an hour. "Hang on, maybe we could get him with some of that Spidereye Brew?" the spaceman thought, recalling when the Skylord had told them about how it induced vomiting.

"That'd be a bit messy wouldn't it? And er- I don't think we've got any…" Honeydew said with a look of repulsion at the thought of vomit everywhere.

"Got any ideas Martin?" Xephos asked with a glance over the shoulder at the bowman.

"Yeah, what are you talking about?" Martin asked bemusedly.

"How we're going to get away from this Skylord bloke." Xephos whispered.

"There's not a lot we can do heroes." Martin assessed "We'll just have to trust him and hope he leaves us alone before we reach your friend. I would say that we could just make a break for it but…none of us really know the layout of the building well for one thing. And for another, you're not a Skylord, Honeydew." Xephos and Honeydew had nothing to argue with that and fell silent. The spaceman was trying to think of some way to get Nathan away but none came to mind. Honeydew seemed in an even worse state, the Dwarf was the picture of nervousness, his hands fidgeting nervously and his hair slightly wild.

Steadily, the three companions led by Nathaniel proceeded up to the fourth floor along the immense marble staircases, which like the entryway were largely devoid of people save for the guards. Each landing led to a hallway, which in turn led to various Skylord offices as Xephos was quick to discover. Moreover, each landing dealt had specific purposes, for example level two was 'Mapping and Navigation', level three 'Department of Internal, External and Military Affairs' and level four 'Trials, Inquiries and Gift Shop'.

"Hang on there's a gift shop?" Honeydew asked looking in disbelief at the carved out label above the landing.

"That's got to be the most mis-fitting place for a gift shop- right next to trials and inquiries." Xephos laughed in agreement.

"Here's a schedule for the current activities." Nathan broke in, handing a scroll to Honeydew who abruptly turned his attention from the hallway where the Dwarf had been looking for the gift shop. "Oh right. Thanks."

"No trouble at all. Always a pleasure to help a fellow Skylord." Nathaniel said pompously, giving Honeydew a pat on the back before he made his way past the heroes and down the staircases. "Well thank Notch he's gone." Honeydew said with a great sigh of relief. "All right so where is this inquiry thinger anyway?" the Dwarf said with a look of irritation as he unfurled the scroll. Honeydew studied it intensely for a moment before making a sound of surprise.

"What?" Martin asked.

"The gift shop closed three minutes ago…" Honeydew said with obvious disappointment but before he could go on Xephos snatched the scroll out of the Dwarf's hands.

"Leave it- you just had dinner! Besides we've got to figure out where auditorium 3 is." Xephos said, ignoring Honeydew's complaints as the spaceman studied the scroll. _Auditorium 3…Auditorium 3.._ "Here it is! I've found it!" Xephos smiled. "Lysander-Inquiry…there's a lot of official crap here…oh perfect it's twelve-thirty to five fifteen! What time is it?"

"Five – twelve p.m. hero." Martin affirmed.

"That's perfect! Then we've only got to wait here for three minutes!" Xephos smiled. Even Honeydew was clearly happy at the news. Quickly the companions made their way to a set of seats near the wall labeled "Visitor's Seating" outside of the auditorium.

"So…what's new with you?" Honeydew asked glancing at his companions.

"Not a lot Dwarf, you?" Martin replied.

"A bit hungry. You should taste the food back in Khaz Mordan, where I'm from." Honeydew said with a look of bliss which could only mean the Dwarf was thinking about Jaffa cakes. Martin chuckled.

"I get mine from Granny's but you already know her legendary cooking right?"

"Yeah, a lovely old woman…" Honeydew sighed. "Oh er and yea the food was good too." Xephos and Martin laughed at this.

"Is your friend okay? The old guy." Martin asked as the bowman reached for something deep inside his pack. "You mentioned him once, said he was sick or something."

"Taint yeah…" Honeydew said.

"Lysander said he sent Eli to look after him." Xephos added.

"Eli? That drunk? Oh, you got a quality healer right there heroes." Martin smirked.

"Lysander said Eli's medicines have been working so he can't be that bad!" Xephos countered.

"Yeah well, if Eli gets too friendly with the bottle you're going to have two medical cases on your hands." Martin replied as he finally pulled a package of crackers out his pack and started eating them.

The companions sat in silence, broken only occasionally by Martin's munching checking their watches every few minutes. Honeydew checked Xephos' watch frequently before finally cursing "These are the longest three minutes ever!"

"What do you want to do hero?" Martin shrugged "It's taken only five minutes longer than it should." Honeydew just grunted in response and fell silent.

"I'm going in there." Honeydew spoke up at once, several minutes later.

"Are you crazy hero? That's a full inquiry in there and you're not even a Skylord!" Martin exclaimed, keeping his voice low as a Skylord passed by the group at that very moment. Xephos just laughed,

"So what?" Honeydew asked. "I mean I look like one right? And besides- he's taking ages in there! Even longer than Fumblemore!"

"Yeah but Simon – in case you haven't noticed – we don't look like Skylords." Xephos said.

"But I thought that was the plan right?" Honeydew asked. "We go in the Sky council, auditorium place – thingy and tell them to shove it and then we leave with Lysander!"

"Yeah- okay but I can't go in there with you hero. At least you too look presentable enough. Besides, I've got to leave soon so there'd be no point in me going in there in the first place." Martin exclaimed.

"So uh…why are you here?" Honeydew asked blankly.

"To answer your question Dwarf- support. I can't seem to keep my nose out of an adventure since I've been around you two, can I? And besides I've got my inn to tend to you know. Probably should have told you that earlier." Martin admitted.

"So you're ditching us then?" Xephos asked.

"No not in that way!" Martin exclaimed. "But really I have my inn and I can't stay away all day you know – didn't really make plans for all this."

"Yeah well," Honeydew said "if you've got to go you've got to go right?"

"Yea hero. This is where I leave you." Martin acknowledged the Dwarf sadly. "Farewell heroes!" the Bowman said giving them both a wave and with that he took off down the hallway and had disappeared down the staircase within a matter of minutes.

"Great, he had to cop out on us. Well who needs him eh?" Honeydew said, not waiting for a response from Xephos. "Alright, let's do this thing."

"Uh- right. You want to go first?" Xephos asked.

"Me?" Honeydew asked "Why me?" Xephos rolled his eyes.

"Because _you're_ the Skylord Simon."

"Oh yeah…" Honeydew said almost as if he wanted a second opinion on that "Skylord Jankle right. Okay then let's do this thing!"

"Right." Xephos smiled "Let's go Simon!" and with that the two heroes opened the door and entered the auditorium.

The auditorium was cramped by the look of it. It was Xephos' first impression of the place and it had caught the spaceman completely off guard. Xephos had been expecting to see another gigantic high domed room such as what the entry room had been like.

"Well, to be honest- I wasn't expecting this." Honeydew remarked. The design of the room made sense to Xephos however, there were probably loads of auditoriums in the place and so they couldn't be too big after all. The companion's entrance seemed to have gone unnoticed by the crowd in the stands surrounding the center of the auditorium where a single man was standing reading off facts. The people in the stands were largely conducting their own business and most of them seemed to be fairly bored with the current proceedings. Xephos was quick to notice that many of them were Skylord's and wore goggles over their heads, some were wearing a green and blue outfit like Honeydew's while others wore red and black.

"So where's Lysander?" Xephos said scanning the auditorium.

"That's him isn't it?" Honeydew said pointing out the man in the center of the auditorium. He was wearing the same uniform as Honeydew.

"I don't know…shall we get a closer look?" Xephos asked.

"What do you think?" Honeydew said with a hint of sarcasm. Xephos just chuckled and with that the two slowly walked towards the center of the auditorium glancing occasionally at the crowd. No one had noticed them yet. Soon they were close enough to make out the face of the man who was speaking; he was thick, black haired and bearded not to mention his deep proper voice. _It's Lysander alright._ Xephos thought.

"62 Iron Ingots…the wood is unaccounted for Skylord Naboth." Lysander said. Xephos and Honeydew were standing behind him at the moment briefly watching the proceedings.

"That's very well Lysander, thank you for your report." The man called Naboth answered. He was clearly Lysander's superior based off the respectful way Lysander addressed him. Naboth, as far as Xephos could tell had completely white hair and his face was lined with wrinkles, the man was clearly very, very old. Maybe he ought to try some of that anti-aging cream Peculier's using. Xephos thought mildly. Naboth was sitting in an elevated podium directly in front of Lysander; he was surrounded by several other Skylords, which Xephos could only assume were also high ranking.

"Indeed Skylord Naboth. When may I attain another airship?" Lysander asked.

"Three days Lysander." Naboth said.

"Three days?" Lysander said with obvious disbelief "But I was told the _Bright Dawn_ was ready to fly today!" Naboth sighed. "I'm afraid not Lysander. You know the rules, I cannot let you fly for three days, it is a necessary precaution." Lysander opened his mouth again in protest but Naboth waved him down before he could speak. "I know you are a good flier Lysander. But these are the rules."

"But-" Lysander said. Again, Naboth cut him off.

"Surely what business you have to attend to can wait three days Lysander?"

"No it can't!" Honeydew blurted out. The room went silent in an instant. Lysander almost fell over at the sound of the Dwarf's voice before turning around and merely gaping at Honeydew.

"Hello Lysander." Honeydew said with a grin.

Naboth sat up in his chair and looked with interest at the newcomer. "And may I ask who you are?"

"Skylord Jankle from Icaria- and yeah I've got some business with Lysander and we can't wait three days!" the Dwarf said heatedly.

"Skylord Jankle? Skylord Jankle…" Naboth repeated to himself. "Robin, do we have a Skylord Jankle in the records?" the old Skylord asked turning briefly to a gaunt, thin little man in a midnight blue suit. Robin looked at the notepad he was holding for a moment before nodding affirmatively to Naboth.

"Welcome Skylord Jankle! From er- Icaria is it?" Naboth said giving the Dwarf an odd look. Naboth had clearly taken notice of Honeydew's undoubtedly Dwarven appearance.

"Yeah!" Honeydew replied. "So why can't we get a ship eh?"

I'm afraid most ships are in current use at the moment… but first please tell us who your friend is." Naboth said calmly, clearly not bothered by what the Dwarf said.

"He's Xephos, an old friend of mine." Honeydew said stoutly, patting Xephos on the back as he said so. Xephos nearly stumbled from the force of the pat. "Oh uh- sorry mate." Honeydew apologized. Naboth chuckled at the scene.

"What do you make of this Lysander?" he asked.

"I-" Lysander stammered clearly shocked at the appearance of the heroes. "Yes I know them- they are companions of mine I can vouch for that." He said.

"Really Lysander! What is the meaning of this?" a white clad Skylord to the left of Naboth asked with obvious irritation.

"Please Vitali! Let me speak!" Lysander asked.

"You may continue." Naboth said leisurely. The Skylord named Vitali glared at Lysander before settling back in his chair.

"Skylord Naboth I would like to discuss this with you in private if possible." Lysander requested. "It is a matter of the gravest importance."

"Well then by all means Lysander you may discuss your business here." Naboth said calmly before motioning the two heroes' forwards. Xephos and Honeydew walked forwards and down the short staircase to the center of the floor where Lysander was.

"Well you've got good timing – I was just finishing! Couldn't it – whatever it is have waited until later?" Lysander hissed.

"No." Xephos said flatly. _Today's the last day to get the ingredients and it's already halfway over!_

"Well we're all very sorry we interrupted!" Honeydew said heatedly.

"Alright, alright." Lysander sighed "So you got in here, I don't know how you did it…"

"The license." Honeydew explained.

"Ah yes of course." Lysander recalled "Very well let's talk over here lest Vitali hears us."

"So if Vitali can't hear us over hear does that mean everyone else will?" Xephos asked curiously.

"You know what I mean hero." Lysander chuckled as he motioned them to a desk at the edge of the center of the auditorium. The three took their seats before Lysander spoke. "Alright, what is it?" he asked his brow furrowing.

"Lysander –" Xephos started before he turned and whispered into Lysander's ear "We need to break into Jasper's house- we don't know which house it is so we need you to help us!"

"What!" Lysander exclaimed causing the heroes to jump back momentarily. Lysander paused as he caught Naboth staring at him from his podium before continuing in a low voice "Don't you know the penalties for burglary heroes? Especially of a Skylord's _hous_ e?!"

"Yeah uh – we're not exactly familiar with all this protocol since we've been here for what? Two days?" Honeydew said sarcastically. Lysander lowered his head "Well I suppose you wouldn't know about that one…" he muttered before continuing "What's in Jasper's house?"

"Diamonds." Xephos and Honeydew said at once although quietly. "To buy a gold apple of Granny and uh- hang on are we forgetting something?" Xephos asked scratching his head.

"Oh yeah and a record. The Presley record or something Father Braeburn wants." Honeydew chipped in.

"Right, and he – Braeburn will give us the Holy Apple in return." Xephos finished. Lysander paused for a long moment as he considered what the heroes had told him. Xephos was about to check if he was still alive before Lysander abruptly spoke. "Yes I do know where Jasper lives. So in regards to your request…well I can aid you in it. "

"Thanks Lysander." Xephos said with a smile.

"Yeah – always knew you would come around." Honeydew said as well.

"Yes, yes." Lysander said obviously annoyed "Let's get out here! We can continue the conversation later! Come along heroes." Lysander said as he stood up, gave a brief bow to Naboth and then walked towards the side aisle where Xephos and Honeydew had entered.

"Oh uh – yeah thanks." Xephos said giving a bow to Naboth. Honeydew followed his lead and did the same before rushing over towards Lysander. Xephos glanced back for a moment at the Skylords in the crowd; many of them were involved heavily in their own business. For a moment Xephos thought he saw someone familiar in the crowd. Was that Honeydew? The spaceman thought, he could have sworn he saw someone looking exactly like the Dwarf in the stands. Xephos suddenly felt a chill run through him, there he was the orange beard and the pudgy face it was unmistakably Honeydew sitting in the stands. But the next moment Honeydew was gone.

Xephos stared at the stands in disbelief. "H-honeydew?" he asked nervously.

"Yeah I'm here. I've been standing here for five minutes! Are you just going to stand there all day?" a familiar voice asked gruffly.

"Huh? Oh yeah – sure thought I saw something…" Xephos said absentmindedly _. Come on, pull yourself together Honeydew's right in front of you, not in the stands!_ The spaceman thought.

"Well come on, we've got to save the world and all that crap." Honeydew said giving Xephos a friendly pat as the two walked out of the auditorium into the main building. Lysander took the lead as he walked them out of the SkyCouncil building and into the night of Mistral. Xephos stared at Honeydew, lost in his thoughts. _I must be going mad!_ Xephos thought. _But if I'm not mad and I did see something than who was that?_ The spaceman shook his head in confusion it couldn't have been Honeydew, his friend was right in front of him! But that face was unmistakable. It had been his friend staring at him from the stands.

"Hey – pal? You all there?" Honeydew asked, bringing Xephos out of his thoughts. The dwarf had glanced back at Xephos slight worry etched into his face. "You've been giving me the silent treatment the entire time! I've been talking to Lysander and you know how boring that is." The dwarf said with a laugh.

"Oh! Yeah I'm fine. Everything's fine…" Xephos trailed off. _Yeah that wasn't Honeydew…probably something I saw…_

The old man had been feeling terribly for the past couple days. Peculier had not had a decent night's sleep on either the floor of Lysander's Elysium nor the bed. However, Peculier's discomfort was not the main reason for why he had gotten so little sleep lately _although this bed isn't exactly helping things_ Peculier thought with a grimace. And for the hundredth time, Peculier wondered who in Notches name designed the blasted thing and how on earth Lysander's guests had ever been able to sleep on it.

The reason for Peculier's discomfort had originated from his dreams of late. Peculier was afraid to close his eyes, because every time he did, Father John or some other nightmarish apparition was always there. They were strange dreams; first that one with Father John, and then that other one with that strange man in the desert. It was chilling, the man had looked oddly like his father, although his eyes were discolored and his face was meaner. Peculier had been wondering about these things for days.

When had they started? Peculier remembered feeling ill soon after the crash. But that was only natural after he had sustained multiple burns and a cracked rib. Even so, he remembered the sand in the cave. He remembered feeling strange standing near the portal. He could hear voices, strange voices, and tortured voices calling his name. Then he remembered falling to the ground, but then Lysander and the heroes had saved him. Peculier sighed, he had heard tell that the tainted sand could cause insanity, how it was cursed by Israphel and affected anyone who ventured into it. Had he stepped in cursed sand back at the cave?

It didn't matter; he had been suffering strange hallucinations. Yes, a hallucination that's what the dreams were. After all the heroes were on his side, not against him! They would never kill him. It was utterly ridiculous to even think that they would. Besides, John was dead. He had died months ago. _Yes, yes of course, this is all a nightmare. I haven't been feeling well as of late and it's only natural to think irrationally…_

Sighing in anguish, Peculier slowly got up out of the bed, the first time he had moved since his second stroke in Mistral. The old man was determined to move and stay awake at all costs otherwise Father John would visit him again in his sleep. Stumbling out of the room, Peculier entered the hallway, which was better lit.

"Hello?" he said hoarsely. No one was there. Peculier felt his throat for a moment; his voice was cracked and weak as he hadn't talked for well over a day. He didn't feel well at all, his head hurt and his knees were weak. _It feels like someone's hitting a hammer over my head…_ Peculier thought, the description was a fitting one to the pain he was feeling.

"Anyone there?" he called. There was no answer. Irritated at being left by himself in such a poor condition Peculier started down the staircase leading to Lysander's sitting room. "Water…" the old man croaked. Peculier's throat was sore; it felt like he had been traveling through the desert for many days with no reprieve.

Slowly the old man crept down the staircase and finally reached the landing after a few minutes. Grasping the staircase handrail for support Peculier took a deep breath and continued into the sitting room. It's so hot in here… Peculier thought as a blast of heat greeted his presence. I must get some water… the old man thought desperately as he heaved himself upright and began to move very slowly to the open kitchen door.

It was at least ten minutes before Peculier entered the kitchen where to his surprise he saw a man in a very neat black suit chopping away on some type of herb. The man had neither noticed nor sensed Peculier's presence.

"Hello? Who are you?" Peculier asked blithely. The man seemed to have either ignored him or did not hear him. "Hello! Can you tell me who you are?" Peculier said as loudly as possible, nearly cracking his vocal cords as he did so.

This time the man seemed to hear him. The man turned around very slowly, at first Peculier could only see the half of his head but then steadily the man's features became apparent. Or what he thought was a man. The thing was staring at him, eyes glowing red. The thing's skin was of a white color, whiter than that of an albino pig. Peculier knew in an instant, who it was, the creature of his nightmares, _Israphel…_

"N-no….NO!" Peculier cried. "It cannot be…" the thing's red eyes glowed, slowly it took a step towards him. "NOOOO!" Peculier screamed in anguish, fumbling at his belt, his sword was not there. _This is a nightmare…it has to be_. Peculier thought desperately. The thing took a step closer, raising its right hand where it held the kitchen knife as if it was attempting to stab Peculier. A grotesque smile spread across the thing's face as it opened to say two words: "Hello Peculier." Peculier stumbled as he heard it speak. Israphel had Xephos' voice.

Peculier screamed throwing himself at the thing. The old man thought as he let his fury take over him, and with a sudden surge of strength Peculier forced the thing down to the floor, his hands closing over its neck. _This is a dream…leave me be!_ Was Peculier's last thought before a great force threw him against a wall and the world went dark.

The man smoothed out his black beard and his royal red shirt. The old man had messed up his hair. He looked with disdain at Peculier who was now lying on the floor, breathing slowly. He had killed that Skylord's stupid butler and put on his clothes, and had easily been able to take out this silly old man. Well, in either case he would serve his purpose well enough. The man reached down and gently picked Peculier up and carried him to the side door, walking past the note he had left pinned to the door. A fleeting thought crossed his mind before he left. Had it all been too easy?

Xephos smiled. No, this service to his master was worth the risk. Now, it was time to wait.

 **A/N: You might be very confused by the end of the chapter, so I'll say this right now- Xephos is not evil. For more reference to this check the beginning of the chapter, Xephos can't be in two places at once can he? But someone else certainly has some malicious intents for the heroes, involving Israphel of course. What is going on? Wait until chapter 9 (will be released by Sunday) to find out!**


	8. Mission Impossible

**SOI Chapter 8: Mission Impossible**

 **A/N: Hey guys I'm very proud to be back with another chapter of the Shadow of Israphel! This chapter is split in two halves, one at Israphel's stronghold and the other of course at Jasper's residence - everyone's favorite scene from the series ;)**

 **This one's a little shorter than the last two simply because I have not been in the writing mood so to speak at all this weekend. However I'm trying to keep to my promises so here we are.**

The chamber was a quiet, roomy place. It had been built underground by a team of Dwarven carvers as legend told but its Dwarven roots were not apparent in its current state. At least, that was what was told by the history of the place. The chamber was barely lit, with piles of glittering glow-stone adorning the walls in glass cases providing most of the scarce lighting. The chamber had not been inhabited for hundreds of years, as it had been consumed a long time ago by the sands and thereafter had been abandoned. The floor of the chamber was carved marble; the ceiling was high, giving the chamber a very imperious and imposing look.

A table with two chairs adorned the center of the chamber, one had an occupant at the moment and the other was empty- although the occupant was expecting a visitor soon. The occupant was dressed entirely in black –he had not worn any other color. The occupant was a man, as far as anyone could discern, as he was certainly nothing else. However, his appearance set him apart from most men. The man had completely white skin- it was almost as if he had never set foot outside in his life. Nevertheless, that was not the cause of the man's unusual color. The man's eyes were red, with deep black pupils. If there was any feature of the man that caused onlookers the most terror it was the color of his eyes, the deep red had caused most to think him insane, a lunatic or evil. But the man wasn't insane or a lunatic. He was calculating, cold and above all smart, which was what he believed had set him apart from the earliest moments of his life. He was a nobleman as he had titled himself and had many subjects, zombies, living skeletons, creepers and even the horrible wraiths known as Ghasts at his command.

The man sighed, and took a sip from the goblet he was currently balancing carelessly in one hand. After a long pause, the man set his drink on the edge of the table and then picked up a white napkin, wiping his colorless lips with it gently.

"Asznog." The main called in a low hiss, his voice reverberating around the chamber walls. The man folded his dampened napkin over a spot of blood that had stained it and gently set it back on the table.

The door directly across the chamber, the only way in and out of the place, opened and in came a gaunt figure. The figure was dressed in a raggedy shirt and leggings- a belt adorned with what were apparently human teeth were slung across his chest. The figure was one that may have disgusted or frightened most onlookers but not the pale faced man. He had shown neither fear or hardly any other emotions before.

"My lord…?" Aszong asked, with a low bow as he approached his master. The man simply gestured to the emptied goblet, which Aszong hurriedly picked up. Aszong was a zombie as could be discerned from his decayed features, withered hair and the gaping hole in his side which only meant that the servant was undead.

"Aszong…your attire is most…unusual. What has brought on this change of dress?" The man observed.

"Death, my lord." Aszong said with a smile showing off the zombie's lack of teeth. The man smiled. "Indeed Aszong… indeed…you may go. But before you do- show John in, he has been waiting for too long now." He said flashing his red gaze at the door before looking back at his servant.

"Yes my lord." The zombie said, giving the man a final bow before disappearing outside. The man sat and waited for a moment before the door creaked open and another figure entered the chamber.

"Please sit John." The man said gesturing to the open seat far across from him.

"Thank you." John said with a similar hissing. John crossed the room and situated himself in the open chair far across from the man. John was a tall white haired man with a long twisted scar on his face, which gave him a frightening appearance especially when he smiled. His hair was slicked back as to cause as little interference as possible in his daily activities. John wore a black outfit with a small white marking near the collar signifying his former occupation as a priest, which he had been in the tiny town of Terrorvale. John was a man, although he had died once, he was one of the man's most faithful and powerful servants. "Master Israphel. I have news." John said upon situating himself.

"As I know you do John…let us hear it." Israphel said, putting his hands together looking upon John expectantly.

"Well my lord- as you know the world has changed, the Templars are few and their forces are weak. I believe, my lord that the plan is almost ready. But my lord you should know those heroes might interfere-" John said, pausing for a moment as if he was expecting affirmation from the man across from him. When none was forthcoming John visibly gulped and continued "-with our plans. They have returned recently from that…little vacation of theirs. But there is a way to stop them. We have captured Peculier and taken him to the abandoned castle outside Mistral. In several hours we hope to lure them into a trap whenever they reach the castle to save him. The place has been properly fortified of course…and Finbar has been notified."

"I have watched the affairs of the world for a thousand years John, and in that time little has changed. Humanity is a race of fools. They are despicable creatures, caught up in emotions and vendettas, especially the Antiochs! Now the only thing I am to the world is a bedtime story used to frighten children." Israphel said dismissively "These… heroes," Israphel spat "bested you in Terrorvale. The capture of Peculier is very good news indeed, I will grant you that John. However… but our progress of late has been slow. What makes you believe you can handle them this time?"

John did not speak for several moments "You have given me great powers my lord. I will make proper use of them. And of course I did not have such powers during the first encounter…"

Israphel looked at his most trusted servant for a brief period before responding. "You will make certain that no one, not anyone interferes with our plans. Is that clear John?"

John gave a bloody smile before continuing, "Yes my lord. It is very clear."

"Your mission at the abandoned castle is an important one. Far too much time has been invested in setting it up..." Israphel hissed "Yes..." Israphel's eyes gleamed "How _is_ our little blacksmith John?"

"Diffcult my lord." John scoffed. "She is resistant. She believes that she will be rescued someday by that innkeeper of hers." Israphel traced a finger along his chin for a moment.

"Peculier…" Israphel murmured. "He has been taken

"My lord?"

"You must deprive them of all hope John. As long as there is hope…" Israphel started "all our efforts will have been for nothing…surely you are aware of this? Someone with your experience?"

"Yes my lord." John said hanging his head "I will redouble my efforts."

"No. Do not simply try harder John…you must remove all hope, in any way you see fit." Israphel replied standing up and pacing around the table. His black and purple cloak trailed behind him on the floor. "Hope John, hope…" he started "It is what caused the construction of the walls, the creation of the crimson cross and the sand wars. Hope." Israphel said with irritation "Tell me John how you would deprive a prisoner of hope?" he asked turning away from the undead reverend.

"I-" John started "I would keep them imprisoned, give them no chance of escape." Israphel nodded giving John his approval for him to continue. "I would show them that there is no possibility for their rescue left." He finished.

"A ten year old child could have told me as much." Israphel said flashing a red glare at John. The reverend bowed his head. "But…by all means continue."

"Capture their heroes and torturing them in front of their eyes, making them do our bidding." The reverend paused for a moment, "The options my lord are endless and naturally, vary between people…" John hissed. Israphel folded his hands behind his back and slowly walked back to his chair where the Dark Lord situated himself. "Then by all means John put your words into practice."

"Practice my lord?"

"Yes John- the blacksmith. Break her. Scars and pain will not break someone- they must be shattered. Anything and everything they care about must be twisted, warped, and destroyed... We are engaged in a war John." Israphel explained "A war which we could lose as long as there is hope. As long as there are heroes there is hope." John seemed to register what his master was saying. "Whether they are driven insane or dead does not matter John, as long as they are no longer a source of _faith._ "

"Yes, my lord. I will do so, at the first chance!" John said eagerly. Israphel gave a twitch of the lips which may have been a smile. However, the dark lord was always pleased to see such eagerness in his servants.

"I suggest you make good use of your servants John. As you know it is rather difficult to clone a human from memory alone."

John smiled "Yes my lord. They were helpful in Mistral."

"Good. You are able then to see where I am leading you with our prisoner?"

"Yes..." John said "It hadn't occurred to me. Thank you my lord."

Israphel nodded and snapped his fingers. The chamber doors opened "That will be all John." The undead Reverend gave a deep bow and slowly made his way out. The doors slammed behind him with a low boom.

Israphel folded his white fingers for a moment and flashed his red eyes around the room. It was very good news that John had managed to succeed, Israphel almost felt pure joy emanating from his insides a feeling that he had not felt since the defeat of the accursed Antiochs. The family had always been a bane too him since the earliest days of his life. He still remembered seeing his entire family, dead at their hands. He remembered laughing at their pain and the shock he experienced when they had managed to kill him. Israphel had survived off the energy of the sands alone for many years and had slowly and agonizingly managed to recreate his body. John had helped him a great deal with his recovery and had treated him as he would a son. Israphel flashed his red glare towards the fireplace and raised his right hand and clenched it into a fist. The fire promptly went out in a puff of smoke. Yes, that would be how he would exterminate the Antioch line, and he, Israphel would have his vengeance at last.

In another chamber a young woman sat against a wall shivering against the cold of the desert. She had been in that same spot for many months; taken from her pleasant home and the work she did there. The chamber was dank, cold and had no amenities save for a small bench and a hole in the floor which served as a toilet. There were many other cells similar to hers which housed many other prisoners. The dungeon was a place far out in the desert which as she had heard was called Mon St. Mikal and had once been a castle used by the Templars before succumbing to the sands. At least that was all that John had told her about the place. Her name was Daisy Duke and she had been imprisoned in the stronghold for nearly a year.

Daisy sat against the wall at the far right end of the cell. It was the only place in the cell which was bearable to sit in for a long period of time. The toilet stunk and was teeming with bugs and other foul creatures as the woman had discovered early in her incarceration. The bench was made of metal and was therefore even colder than the hard dirt which she was currently lying on. The ceiling of the cell was high, there was no opening in the ceiling and like the surrounding walls it was made of solid stone bricks. There was no way to scale up any part of the prison walls as they were made out of smooth stone with few cracks and no outcrops to latch onto. The only way in and out of the cell was through the iron door across from her.

Daisy was young, green eyed, blonde haired woman and appeared to be in her late twenties, although she was actually thirty one. She was dressed in a simple, worn, white gown which fell just below her knees- it was the only clothes she had which were given to her upon her arrival at the dungeon. Daisy also sported several cuts and bruises along her legs and arms from the duration of her incarceration. The cuts signified her important status in the prison. Many of the other prisoners had been imprisoned and simply forgotten about – their cries for help and freedom ignored by the undead guards who patrolled the place. Daisy however, had been given the attention of her captors nearly every day, in the form of consistent torture. From the first day of her arrival she had been put on nearly every kind of fiendish device and had been forced to drink multiple potions by her captors. She had been subjected to hallucinations and had been forced to watch people she cared about die one horrible simulated death after another.

At the moment she was examining one of the cuts on her arm, a replica from the last torture session two nights before. It was a long black and red scar, one of several. She paused for a moment and felt her face something she did on a regular basis. Daisy traced her fingers along her forehead and chin; there were a few long lines there which she distinguished by the rough lump each cut created in her skin. She sighed and leaned back against the wall tapping her head against it several times. It was frustrating, she didn't know what her interrogators wanted – she had told them many times she knew nothing – but that didn't seem to bother them. Each interrogation session was more unnerving than the last one as the more she told them she knew nothing the more they tortured her. It was like they were torturing her for the sport of it.

But what was by far the thing that had unsettled Daisy the most was who her torturer was. She had known Reverend John in Terrorvale; she had gone to church there at St. Creepers and had even hosted him at dinner several times. Now he was her torturer he seemed to enjoy tormenting her with a sick lust. Daisy shivered to think of their first session, his words had haunted her for the entirety of her stay. For a moment Daisy drifted off into the dream world as she had done many times in the prison. Their initial exchange slowly floated into her head.

" _Why it looks like we have a new visitor…" the voice of Reverend John drawled. Daisy whirled around and faced him. He was smiling; a small trail of blood ran down his lips. John was standing on the landing and had just noticed the newest prisoner._

" _No! It can't be!" she screamed. John looked at her with mock pity as he paused for a moment to wipe the blood off with a handkerchief._

" _Miss Duke I must ask you to calm down. I'm afraid screaming…. will really do you no good while you are here." She shrieked as she was grabbed by two zombie guards and slowly drawn away._

" _You betrayed him! How could you!" Daisy yelled as she was dragged away. John looked back at her his eyes gleaming red. A sickening smile covered his face, one of great pleasure at her anger._

" _Yes Miss Duke. I did."_

" _I trusted you!" she screamed. John looked away and walked down towards the end of the hallway before responding._

" _Miss Duke, didn't you know it's unwise ever to trust?"_

Daisy panted as she awoke from the memory. She was breathing hard; and by the look of it had scratched her arms leaving an angry red rash over her cuts. Slowly Daisy managed to calm herself down, after a few minutes her breathing returned to normal and her head cleared. It had taken weeks but slowly Daisy had been able to get over the initial shock of seeing John as her torturer. Daisy wasn't about to break like others had- she had heard their cries for mercy as they had all been driven into insanity by John and his fiendish guards. Instead Daisy had tried to set her mind to escaping from her dungeon- the thought of eventually doing so was one of the things that kept her sane. She had examined every nook and cranny of her cell, there was no way out. As for the torture chamber, there were guards at every entrance and she was always under the supervision of John during each session. Although she was reasonably skilled at fighting Daisy had long ago eliminated any chance of gaining a weapon and battling her way out. Any idea of doing that was further sullied by the presence of the pale faced git also known as Israphel.

Suddenly, in the midst of her thoughts of escape the door burst open and a familiar figure slowly stepped into the cell. It was Reverend John, which was made even clearer by the long twisted scar near his mouth that never seemed to heal and his combed back white hair. Daisy had briefly wondered about his scar and how he had attained it, but for the sake of her sanity she did her best to ignore it.

"Good evening Miss Duke." John said cordially. For some reason, John insisted on pleasantries such as _Miss_ , or _Mr._ Truthfully, it almost made Daisy sick to be called Miss Duke.

"John." She replied stiffly looking down, avoiding his face. There was a silence; John appeared to be ready to announce something. Daisy braced herself; it was most likely they would be changing the method of torture again.

"You have a visitor." John said. Daisy merely shrugged. "Didn't you hear me Miss Duke? You have a guest, an old… _friend_." He flashed Daisy the same maniacal smile as he had upon her arrival to Mon St. Mikal.

"I heard you." Daisy responded.

"Here he is. He'll be sharing the cell with you- I'm afraid the others are full at the moment." John explained. Suddenly a loud thump followed signifying the arrival of her new cellmate. When Daisy didn't respond John turned and left, the iron door clanging in his wake. Finally alone and her torturer gone Daisy raised her head and looked at her cellmate. He was lying face down in the cell. The newcomer had motley brown hair and was dressed in a gray over-shirt and tattered pants. A scabbard, which may have once contained a sword, lay limply at his side.

Suddenly the man stirred, slowly but surely he awoke. It was then that Daisy glimpsed his face. He had deep brown eyes and a worn but energetic face. It was her love from long ago, back in Terrorvale.

"Peculier!" she cried in complete shock trying to reach for him. Peculier jumped back against the wall, looking as surprised by her presence as she was by his.

"Who are you?" he asked looking around wildly.

"I'm Daisy! Daisy Duke! Don't you recognize me?" she asked looking at him with great concern. "My love, where- h-how did you get here?"

"I-" Peculier said before he glanced down at the floor again. "I don't know who you are…" he muttered "I don't know…I don't know why I'm here – to be honest." Daisy sighed in exasperation,

"I don't know! What happened to you? Are you okay?"

"I-" Peculier started "It's…it was horrible Daisy-I-I…I don't know…."

"What are you saying!" Daisy exclaimed in exasperation. Peculier just looked at her sadly. "Don't just look at me like that! You can tell me what happened- please Peculier?" she begged.

"It was one night…I can't remember whether it was ten nights or twenty nights ago. But the heroes- H-honeydew and Xephos…they're not how they seem Daisy…" Peculier begun as he slowly told his tale. The woman called Daisy was listening attentively; she seemed to care greatly for him. Perhaps she would believe him, but maybe she would not. However, the longer he talked the more convinced, and distressed she seemed to become. She kept calling him things like 'dear' and 'my love'. It almost made him gag. But he kept talking and saying the things he had been instructed to say. Peculier forced a saddened face as he reached the climax of his story,

"Xephos-they're…Daisy they're with Israphel…I saw it."

There was a loud scream followed by a feminine wail. John paused and looked in the direction of Daisy's cell. He smiled; eliciting human emotions was something he never tired of.

"Observe her carefully Aszong." John said as another wail rang out from the cell. The zombie nodded briefly and opened his mouth in reply. "Don't worry." John smirked "I will be back soon, however I sense there is some…unfinished business I must attend to in Mistral at the moment." And with that the undead reverend walked out the door of the observation chamber. From what he had just seen, John had no doubt in his mind that progress with their best prisoner would be soon to come.

Lysander led the heroes through the city blocks leading up to the Sky-Tower. After showing the guard – a different one than previously- his identification they made the group made their way to the upper city of Mistral. As it was now night the Mistral Lamplighters had apparently lit a number of floating lamps in the upper city. Their work gave the upper part of Mistral the appearance of a night sky dotted with multiple ember stars. Xephos was thankful for the lighting, it gave him confidence that he wasn't about to fall off one of the handle-less walkways.

"Hey, Lysander where are we going?" Honeydew asked after they had reached the upper city. Lysander was inching along the walkways occasionally muttering something as he went. "I could have sworn it was right here…" he murmured before glancing at the Dwarf "I'm looking for our entrance hero."

"Entrance?" the Dwarf asked "we're way above like…anything! His house isn't up here is it?" Honeydew asked looking around the skyline of dimly illuminated towers. Lysander sighed with mild impatience,

"No Dwarf it is not. His airship is though- however what I'm looking for is our way down."

"Our way down? Hang on- Lysander we're not just going to jump on Jasper's house or something are we? I mean, it wouldn't be such a big problem but we didn't bring parachutes or anything." Xephos asked giving the Skylord an odd look. Lysander smiled at this, his gray-brown eyes giving a dangerous twinkle,

"You're a good guesser hero. That's exactly what we're going to do…but don't worry Dwarf we're not going to _actually_ jump." Lysander said addressing the Dwarf in particular who looked very apprehensive at the prospect of jumping thirty meters down.

"So then- hang on, so is there something we're climbing down? I mean I get that we can't exactly go up to his front door and say 'excuse me, could we rob your house for a moment?'" Honeydew said causing Xephos and Lysander to laugh.

"Yes hero that's what I had in mind."

"What does it look like?" Xephos asked "The spot with the way down."

"A waterfall hero, it runs into Jasper's house."

"Uh- wait a waterfall what?" Honeydew asked, clearly not sure that he had heard Lysander correctly.

"A waterfall hero, it should be around here somewhere. It goes through a hatch in Jasper's roof and provides him with running water." Lysander explained.

"Waterfalls, floating towers, crazy wizards, airships, and creepers as gunpowder vendors…wonderful…this place has everything doesn't it?" Honeydew muttered sarcastically.

"How do you know that? The waterfall bit?" Xephos queried. Lysander was getting awfully specific about it. It was like the Skylord had tried breaking into Jasper's house before.

"I've been to his home before." Lysander said simply as he ran his hands through his hair and began moving down the walkway in search of the mysterious waterfall.

"Alright let's help him look shall we?" Honeydew smiled.

"Yeah…let's do it pal." Xephos agreed as the two walked past Lysander and started scanning the skyline and the surrounding walkways for any sign of the waterfall. Xephos was a few meters ahead of Lysander and paced slowly forwards and then backwards again looking for the waterfall. "C'mon where are you…" Xephos muttered as he peered over the side of the bridge but there was nothing aside from the outline of several lightly snowed rooftops. Honeydew and Lysander by the look of it weren't having any better luck with finding the waterfall. Several minutes passed where the only sound was the shuffling of their feet along the walkway. Suddenly Xephos felt a light pat on his shoulder.

"What the…" the spaceman said spinning around. There was no one there. _Honeydew?_ Xephos thought but the Dwarf was over four meters from him. _Then what was that?_

Xephos got his answer as he felt another pat on the top of his head. The spaceman glanced upwards and felt another small pat near his cheek. "Snow!" Xephos laughed. The sky was full of thousands of big white snowflakes and they were starting to come down steadily faster.

"Hey- uh Lysander! Honeydew! Have you found that waterfall yet?" Xephos called, walking through the increasingly heavy snow to his companions. Xephos drew his cloak around him tightly to shield his clothes from the weather.

"No, and the waterfall will probably be frozen by the time we find it!" Honeydew grumbled.

"Ah! Here it is heroes!" Lysander called. _And not a moment too soon_ Xephos thought.

"Brilliant!" Xephos and Honeydew said together as they jogged over to Lysander was standing next to a pool of water on one of the floating islands. Xephos glanced down for a moment; the water flowed out of the side of a building and straight down into what appeared to be some sort of glass chamber.

"We must jump in the water and float all the way down." Lysander explained.

"Won't we get soaked?" Honeydew asked, "The gunpowder could be ruined!" Lysander smiled at this.

"Not to worry heroes, this water has an enchantment on it to prevent such events. It's fine, I've been through this many times." The Skylord said calmly to Honeydew's and Xephos' looks of apprehension. "I'll go first- bombs away!" Lysander said jauntily as he slipped into the waterfall and out of sight. The heroes stood there for a moment and watched as the figure of Lysander slowly floated down towards Jasper's rooftop.

"Do Skylords say that? 'Bombs Away'?" Honeydew said "Sounds more like a thing pirates say doesn't it?" Xephos laughed "Come on Simon." He said. And with that the two heroes splashed into the waterfall and began their descent to Jasper's penthouse. Lysander was right; floating in the enchanted waterfall was like floating through air, although strangely Xephos didn't even feel damp let alone wet. _This is weird!_ The spaceman thought as he slowly floated to the top of the penthouse where Honeydew was currently waiting.

Xephos slid out of the water and joined Honeydew on the roof of the penthouse. Sliding on the slippery surface, the spaceman landed on the roof with a loud thump.

"Where's Lysander?" Xephos asked curiously pulling himself back up.

"Uh…I think he might have fallen off." Honeydew said glancing over the side of the penthouse where the waterfall continued off the side of the building.

"WHAT WAS THAT NOISE?" a muffled voice called loudly from within the house. "WHAT THE HELL!"

"Oh cripes, now we've done it."

"Did you break a window or something?" Xephos asked in a hushed voice.

"Uh…" Honeydew started looking up at the spaceman from inside the penthouse. "You know you've got to get in _somehow_ and there was no bloody hatch so I just made one." Xephos burst out laughing although as quietly as possible, wary that Jasper might hear.

Carefully Xephos lowered himself through the broken window taking care to avoid any shards of glass. "Welcome to Jasper's penthouse." Honeydew said in a good imitation of Lysander's businesslike voice.

"Stop- you're going to bore me if you keep talking like that." Xephos grinned.

"RUN!" a deep voice yelled from outside.

"That wasn't me…" Honeydew said in alarm.

"No- that was Lysander!" Xephos said.

"Quick! Start ransacking chests!" Honeydew exclaimed "You take these two and I'll take these." The Dwarf directed moving over to two chests to the right side of the room.

"LYSANDER!" Jasper's angered voice bellowed "I WILL END YOU! This is the LAST bloody time!" Xephos and Honeydew burst out laughing at the sound of him.

"Uh- yeah…D'you reckon Lysander's alright?"

"Yeah…he'll be fine…" Honeydew said as a loud crash came from outside followed by a yell of pain from Jasper. For a brief moment the two heroes wondered just what Lysander was doing to Jasper before refocusing on the task at hand. For Xephos' part he'd rather not think about it.

"None of these have a record in them!" Xephos exclaimed in frustration as he threw aside a couple pieces of paper from one of the chests. "Did you find a record Simon?"

"No-c'mon let's check downstairs." Honeydew said, rushing for the stairs on tiptoe. Lysander was evidently doing a very good job keeping Jasper distracted as several more exchanges followed as the heroes made their way downstairs. The room below the penthouse smaller and crammed with chests along the walls, there was also a neatly made bed and a jukebox near it. There was also a larger portrait of Skylord Jasper on a rainbow background mounted above the bed. Clearly this was Jasper's bedroom.

"Wow even the painter couldn't make the bastard look half decent could he?" Honeydew said looking at Jasper's portrait.

"Maybe he's Irish?" Xephos suggested.

"Irish?"

"Yeah, I was thinking of the leprechauns and the whole pot of gold thing…anyway that's not important! Jasper could be in here at any minute." Xephos exclaimed.

"Pot of gold? Where did that connection come from?" Honeydew laughed.

"That's not important!" Xephos scowled, "Anyway he's got a jukebox so you can check that and I'll check the chests – there's got to be a record in here somewhere if he has a jukebox."

Honeydew checked the jukebox but there was no record in it. Xephos checked all the chests as well but while there were no records the spaceman did discover two diamonds which he quickly pocketed.

"Damn it! Where's the record?!" Honeydew said in frustration, banging on the jukebox several more times but no record was forthcoming.

"Maybe the record's hidden somewhere…" Xephos murmured.

"Yeah I think I figured that one out for myself thanks." Honeydew said sarcastically.

"Well it's got to be in here somewhere…some secret door…a secret room maybe?" Xephos said poking around the room. Honeydew shrugged and walked outside, Xephos followed him, they hadn't checked there yet. To Xephos' surprise another chest adorned the dock and he quickly checked it finding yet another diamond. Xephos smiled as he pocketed the third jewel, _three down and four to go he thought_.

In the meantime Honeydew was checking Jasper's airship which was landed at the dock at the moment. The Dwarf was walking all over the airship, checking everything but after a few moments he walked off and rejoined Xephos on the dock.

"No diamonds, no record or anything?" Xephos asked.

"No I couldn't find any chests on the ship." Honeydew said sadly. "Damn!" he swore before walking back inside with Xephos. _There must be something we didn't check…_ Xephos thought as he glanced around the room again. For many more minutes the two heroes fruitlessly ransacked Jasper's bedroom, there was no record, nothing.

"Did you check the bed?" Honeydew asked, taking a rest on a nearby chair.

"No, but I'm checking it now." Xephos said as he grabbed the end of the bed and positioned his arms under its frame. The bed rose several inches and came back down very quickly causing a muffled crash. The heroes froze in paranoia for a moment listening for the sound of Jasper's voice but none was forthcoming. Honeydew grinned in relief "I guess he hasn't heard us – need some help pal?" he asked.

"Yeah – I'm failing to negotiate this bed." Xephos admitted. Honeydew smiled and walked over and with one arm upended the entire bed sending it flying against the wall causing another muffled crash.

"Oi! Keep it down." Xephos hissed. Honeydew just grunted in response.

"Are you that weak? That was easy." The Dwarf taunted. "Maybe you should start working out more – you know get some of those electrolytes." Xephos just shook his head as he wiped an uncooperative hair out of his eyes.

"We've found it!" the spaceman smiled as he looked at an exposed chest which had been cleverly concealed under the bed. Quickly, knowing Jasper could appear at any moment Xephos unlatched the chest and pulled out a single encased record from within it, along with a slice of cake.

"Oh brilliant! You got the record- and is that cake?" the Dwarf asked staring at the two items Xephos was holding. The spaceman chuckled quietly "C'mon let's put the bed back and get the hell out of here."

"Alright but first are you going to eat that cake?" Honeydew asked.

"I don't know- it might be expired." Xephos said taking a small bite out of the slice. "Mmm! Never mind – this is really quite good."

"You're not really going to eat all of that are you? There could be germs…and stuff."

"Yeah but- it's cake. Honestly would you pass that up?"

"Maybe it's got some preservatives in it." Honeydew wondered "I heard they were adding those in foods…makes them last longer apparently… alright alright, just gimme a slice already!"

"You've earned it." The spaceman smiled, handing him the remainder of the cake. Honeydew set the bed down as gently as possible and took the cake and ate it in one quick gulp.

"Alright c'mon let's get the hell out of here." Honeydew said, quickly making for the penthouse. With the record case in one hand and his sword in the other, Xephos followed his Dwarven friend. They climbed over the smashed bookcase and out the window into the snowy night sky unaware of the peril they and their companion were in.

 **A/N: I know some of you may be wondering what on earth is going on. This is a long story, and like any other story of that nature things will gradually be revealed and tied up at the end. If you have any suggestions on how to make The Shadow of Israphel even better please let me know!**

 **We have finally made it through the first eight episodes of SoI. Whew! Chapter 9 – Fumblemore's Magical Cure all for Maladies and Illnesses will be out in a week from today.**

 **PEACE!**

17


	9. The Holiest Apple

**SoI Chapter 9: The Holiest Apple**

 **A/N: Welcome back to another chapter of the custom retold of the Shadow of Israphel! This one's a nice short transition chapter for your pleasure :)**

 **Aside from that Chapter 1 of this story has been HEAVILY edited for grammatical errors and I strongly suggest checking those out.**

 **This chapter has been edited as of 9/6/2015**

"Jasper you're a fag!" the deep voice of Lysander boomed through the penthouse.

"No I'm not!" Jasper screeched "Get. Out. Of. My. Bathtub Lysander! Or I will report your misconduct to the SkyCouncil and Skylord Vitali!"

"What? You started it!"

"LYSANDER!" Jasper thundered. This was followed by a loud crash and a yell of pain. By the sound of it, Jasper had fallen down or stubbed his toe rather badly on something.

Xephos exchanged a look with his friend up on the rooftop.

"What is he doing to him?" Honeydew laughed,

"I don't know but he probably deserves it." Suddenly there was a loud shriek from below followed by pounding footsteps and another round of cursing.

"MY RECORD! WHERE IS MY BEAUTIFUL, VINTAGE, POLISHED, ONE AND ONLY ELVIS PRESLEY RECORD?!" Jasper bellowed. "AAAAGH!"

Xephos and Honeydew nearly jumped in surprise at this causing Xephos to almost drop the record case. Then there was a loud boom and another yell from Jasper,

"Yes, the rooftop! That's where they must have gone- thieves!"

Xephos glanced nervously at Honeydew, "The rooftop? Do you think he knows it's us? How did he find out…?"

"Um… does it matter? He's gonna find out in a hurry if we don't get out of here!" Honeydew said worriedly. The two hurried towards the waterfall streaming down on the house before they were met there by none other than Skylord Jasper and he was holding a sword.

"AHA!" Jasper exclaimed "If it isn't the fake Skylord from earlier! And what do you think you're doing with my record?!" he hissed, seeing the case in Xephos' hands.

"Um we- er we kind of need it, you know business and all that." Honeydew said sheepishly.

"Buisness?! Criminal business I bet! Hand over the record spaceman or I put a hole in that ugly shirt of yours." Jasper growled.

"You're not laying a hand on him before I have something to say about it." Honeydew said as Xephos slowly backed away from Jasper. But Honeydew wasn't able to say anything more as Jasper lashed out with his sword at him.

"Lewis - !" Honeydew exclaimed as the sword sped towards his chest. He closed his eyes, it was over, and they had failed. Honeydew waited several seconds but the impending attack never reached him. Instead there was a loud thunk followed by a grunt of pain. Slowly he opened his eyes to see that Skylord Jasper had fallen atop of the roof and the record case lay by his side. Honeydew stared in disbelief at the scene for a moment before he saw his friend panting nearby, sword in hand.

"I'm alive Lewis! I'm alive!" he said giddily. "Thanks pal."

Xephos laughed, and reached for the record case, "Don't mention it friend, don't mention it."

"He's a bit of a grumpy fellow isn't he?"

"Bit grumpy yeah." Xephos smiled.

"Gods… what did you do to him?" Honeydew asked, looking at the k'oed Jasper curiously. "I thought I was going to die there…"

"What do you think I did?" Xephos asked "Turns out the Holy Record's a little more useful than I thought."

"You threw it at him?" Honeydew chuckled "That's genius of you Lewis. Flat out bloody genius."

Xephos laughed,

"Yeah well I couldn't watch my best mate go down like that especially to a grouchy git. Speaking of which what do _you_ want to do with him?" he asked, gesturing to the unconscious Skylord.

"Let's just leave him here. Honestly I don't want to deal with him anymore. Besides I think we're all a lot safer the farther away Jasper is." Honeydew said. "Plus it's not like he's not _really_ hurt or anything – I mean – it looks like he's taking a little bath actually…"

Xephos shook his head, suppressing a laugh,

"Yeah… right well for our escape options we can either go up here…" he glanced up at the waterfall, "Or we can go that way, over the side."

"You know as long as we get out of here before Jasper wakes up that's good with me." Honeydew said. Xephos glanced back at him,

"Ready to go up pal?"

"Whenever you want – wait, wait a second here. Won't the water damage the Holy Record? Otherwise it'll be the Soggy Record or something…" Honeydew pointed out. "Can you imagine that? The Church of the _Soggy_ Record?"

Xephos laughed, "Not really, that might put a _damper_ on things." Xephos laughed.

"Really? A water joke?" Honeydew asked. "You're pathetic."

"Yeah but it's late and cold outside and that's all I've got at the moment. Anyway do you remember what Lysander said about the water?" Xephos said.

"Come on you expect me to remember what he says when _you_ don't listen to him?"

Xephos ignored him. "Lysander said that the water is enchanted to not actually make you all soggy and stuff. It's something that the tourist board implemented…yeah I think it was the Mistral City tourist board."

Honeydew stared at him for a moment and shook his head "The Mistral City tourist board? Wow… you're already starting to bore me." Xephos smiled,

"C'mon let's go. You don't want to wait around until Jasper wakes up do you?"

"No thank you!" Honeydew said, pausing to kick the unconscious Jasper before he jumped into the waterfall and the two made their way up to the top.

Once Xephos reached the top of the waterfall he felt a rough hand grab his arm and yank him up onto the bridge.

"What the-" he started before Xephos found himself staring straight into the displeased face of one of the Mistral City guards. "Oh for cripes sake… this again?!"

"Who are you?" the guard demanded once Xephos had reached the landing.

"Yeah well who are you?" Xephos retorted.

Xephos stumbled back as the guard drew his sword and pointed it at his chest threateningly "I ask the questions here." He snarled. However before the guard could say anything more Honeydew had abruptly appeared from behind him.

"Why don't you ask him?" Xephos asked gesturing to Honeydew.

"What are you talking about?" the guard sneered.

"Him." Xephos pointed to Honeydew.

The guard whirled around but before he could catch a glimpse Honeydew smashed his fist into his face. The guard flew backwards into the waterfall and began to slowly float down towards the top of Jasper's penthouse.

"Thanks." Xephos said.

"Don't mention it… but dammit. We are catching _all_ the bad breaks today aren't we?" Honeydew grumbled.

"Yeah, anyway c'mon there could be more of them." Xephos said, taking off down the bridge with Honeydew in tow.

Xephos raced down the steps of one of the bridges into a tower he didn't recognize. He sighed,

"Screw it." He muttered and opened the door.

Xephos entered the tower and sprinted down the winding stairwell to the bottom with his friend in wheezy pursuit. Miraculously, they didn't encounter any more guards and had reached the ground floor in a matter of minutes. However the pair had reached the bottom, a nearby door opened followed by a pair of heavy footsteps. _Not again!_

Xephos swore silently, but he turned around to see none other than their companion, Lysander leaning against the door. He was surveying them with an irritated expression as if they were making him late for a very important dinner party.

"Oh gods, thank Mordan it's you Lysander." Honeydew breathed, clutching his chest. Lysander shot him a quizzical look.

"We thought you were a guard or something." Xephos explained.

"Ah yes of course. Understandable." Lysander said brusquely "Well I've walked all the way over here, so tell me do you have the record?"

"You walked all the way over? Wait a second, how'd you know we'd be here?" Xephos asked. Lysander gave a sigh,

"I saw you up on the bridge of course, after your brief quarrel – shall we say - with the guard. All I had to do was follow your direction. But that is unimportant… Please spaceman, is the record in that case?"

Xephos looked at him in puzzlement before it dawned on him, "Oh uh - this? The – box thing? Yeah the record's in it."

"The holy record you mean." Honeydew said smarmily.

"Right the _holy_ record." Xephos said. "That's a little ironic isn't it? It's a holy record and it has a hole in it."

"Wow it's even holier than I thought…" Honeydew murmured

"Very true." Lysander said "Even so – well done heroes! Well done indeed! I knew you could do it!"

"Lysander did you know you said well five times in that statement?" Honeydew pointed out.

"Naturally! I was pleased at your accomplishment!"

"Yeah well we _are_ heroes."

"Heroes right…yea this is what we do every day Lysander, nothing to it really." Xephos added.

"Indeed." Lysander continued, "Right well- seeing as it is late we must hurry to Father Braeburn. Fumblemore leaves tomorrow so there is no time to waste!"

"What? Could we have a time out? Maybe a few minutes or something? A bit of a break you know, get a bit of coffee, a little rest, maybe a bit of a poo…" Honeydew suggested.

"Dwarf how can you think of such trivial things at this hour?" Lysander asked with a shocked expression on his face, "After all, desperate times call for desperate measures!"

"He's a bit tuckered out Lysander." Xephos explained "You know - all that running."

"Ah." Lysander said "Well I suppose we could hold off the quest for a few minutes."

"Thank you Lysander…thanks very bloody much…" Honeydew muttered. "Speaking of which, what where you doing to Jasper anyway? We heard uh - a few splashes." he asked surveying Lysander's wet clothing and the dark spot around his crotch. At this Lysander gave him a look,

"I'd appreciate it if you didn't ask." He said coldly.

 _Must be the bit about the bathtub…_ Xephos thought. He had to admit, the very idea of being in the same bathtub as Jasper would be pretty frightening not to mention a little weird.

"Yes of course, that reminds me…" Lysander said glancing down at the dark spot "Do you have an extra cloth? Something wide will do fine."

"How wide?" Honeydew asked holding his hands out. Lysander glared at him,

"A small towel will do fine. Do you have one?"

Honeydew reached into his knapsack. "Yeah I got one."

Seconds later Honeydew handed him one of Jasper's puffy pink towels. Lysander looked at it disdainfully,

"Not to be picky but are you certain you don't have another color?"

"No." Honeydew deadpanned "I don't know if you realized this Lysander, but I don't spend all my time packing towels."

"Yes well… I suppose this will have to do." Lysander sighed. "Although I would rather you didn't watch heroes."

They laughed nervously and turned around. After about a minute Lysander had part of the towel stuffed down his trousers and the other covering the spot in his personal area.

"You – uh all good there?" Honeydew asked.

Lysander shot him a look "Of course dwarf! Have you finished resting yet?"

"Yeah I'm good. Just don't move too fast." He pleaded.

"Of course, of course. Onward!" And without another word Lysander bolted out the door.

"Hey, I said go slow!" Honeydew yelled, as he stumbled and started after Lysander with Xephos in pursuit.

Several minutes later Lysander, Xephos, and a slightly green Honeydew were at the door of the Church of the Holy Apple. Or what used to be the Holy Apple that is. Apparently, Father Braeburn had taken it upon himself to redecorate the church in preparation for the arrival of the Holy Record. At the front of the church instead of the enormous glass gold apple the glass had been re-arranged into the shape of a magnificent golden record.

"Whoa, he went all out on it didn't he?" Xephos said staring at the icon.

"Indeed hero." Lysander nodded "It is very pretty. But no matter, we must wake Braeburn. Hopefully he isn't asleep or hasn't been sleeping long…"

Lysander knocked several times on the reverend's door. There was a silence, he knocked again, but louder. Once again there was no response.

"OI! Hey – uh Father Braeburn! Elvis- man! We don't have infinite time and uh – WE REALLY NEED YOU TO WAKE UP!" Honeydew yelled through the keyhole.

"Dwarf please!" Lysander exclaimed. "People are sleeping!"

"Probably not anymore..." Xephos said.

Ironically, hardly a moment later the door opened to reveal a bemused Father Braeburn with his signature sunglasses propped up on his nose.

"Heroes? Skylord? Thank Notch it's you. I just heard the most frightful noise. Some brute was yelling at my door!" he said fearfully.

"It is well Father…" Lysander sighed, "It was nothing."

"Are you sure? Perhaps they have vandalized the church!" Braeburn said, pushing past the group to examine the exterior of the church. He looked at it for several moments before breathing a deep sigh of relief and drawing a circle around his face with his hands. "Ah… Thank Notch. I put hours into these renovations - but some people just don't appreciate the effort into large projects!"

"Yeah we know what you mean Father." Xephos said, thinking back to the time he baked his first cake and Honeydew threw it down the toilet after taking one bite of it. In retrospect - that had not been one of the finer moments of their friendship.

"Indeed, some people can't let everyone else get a decent night's sleep! I was just dreaming up ideas for further renovations before I was awoken! Yes well…good heavens it is quite cold…" Braeburn clutched his thin robes around him as he waddled back inside. "Come heroes, let us talk indoors. Notch gave us nice warm houses – not to mention air conditioning - for a reason after all!"

"That has to be one of the best things I've heard come from his mouth so far…" Honeydew muttered as Braeburn shepherded them indoors. Lysander looked at him scandalously,

"Thank you for your hospitality Father." He said, "We greatly appreciate it."

"Of course, of course! Anytime! After all, hospitality is my middle name."

"Really?" Honeydew asked. Braeburn laughed at this,

"No hero it's merely a figure of speech."

"Oh, I didn't know." Honeydew muttered.

"Well," Braeburn said as he walked around the chapel lighting up the torches "what can I do for you heroes? I must admit you caught me on a bit on short notice."

"We have the record!" they said proudly.

Braeburn smiled brightly, "Why that's wonderful news heroes! Is it in that box?"

"Yeah." Xephos said. Braeburn extended a hand towards the record case,

"May I see it?"

Xephos handed Braeburn the case. The reverend ran his fingers over it covetously for a moment before he clicked the lock and removed the lid.

"By Notch- it's beautiful! I've never seen something so- so amazing in my life! Why – it looks even better than my gold encrusted apricot!"

Xephos made a face at this. A gold encrusted _apricot_?

"My… this is precisely what the Church needs!" Braeburn hummed "A little more music! And you got all the good songs too – excellent… Thank you heroes! Thank you very, very much!"

"Ohh you know. We do this every day." Honeydew shrugged.

"Yeah, it was barely a hassle. Took maybe- five minutes?" Xephos added.

"Thank you for your patience father." Lysander bowed.

"Yes well…well, well, well!" Braeburn smiled "I won't ask too many questions about where you got it."

"Can we have the apple please?" Honeydew asked in a strained voice.

"Yes! The apple – of course!" Braeburn jabbered, "Let me get it for you."

"Finally…" Honeydew sighed once Braeburn was out of earshot.

Shortly thereafter Braeburn walked back with a shining gold apple in hand. "Here, take it – and by Notches' shining grace – may you enjoy it!"

With a flourish he handed the apple over to Xephos.

"Thank you Father!" Xephos exclaimed pocketing the apple.

"These are good tidings indeed." Lysander concurred. "Many apologies Father but we must be off."

"I'm sorry to hear that." Braeburn said "I was hoping you'd stay for some sacramental apple juice!"

"Excuse me? Did you say sacramental apple juice - ?"

"No – no business is business Father." Lysander said cutting across Honeydew.

"Well that is unfortunate." Braeburn folded his hands together "Farewell heroes, and may Notch bless you in your future works. Now," he turned back to the chapel "to redecorate the rest of this place!"

With that the companions exited the building into the chilly night air, where it had thankfully stopped snowing.

"Farewell Father!" Xephos said as the door closed. "That's brilliant. Now we can save Old Peculier!"

"Um… Lewis we still need one more apple." Honeydew pointed out.

"Oh cripes that's right." Xephos said.

"No it's okay! Granny has the other one." Honeydew said.

"Right… but don't have the seven diamonds we need!" Xephos groaned. Honeydew rolled his eyes,

"Of course we do silly."

He held out a hand to reveal four gleaming diamonds.

"You got four? That's perfect!" Xephos smiled "I got three and that makes seven!"

"Well yeah I knew that. I did take basic addition." Honeydew said.

"That settles it I believe." Lysander said "Where do you need to go heroes?"

Honeydew smiled, "I think it's time to pay Granny another visit."

"Is her place open right now?" Xephos asked doubtfully.

"No, but Fumblemore is leaving soon so it's gonna be!"

 **A/N: And that's a wrap! Oh man, it feels so GOOD to finally break out of a writer's block and post a new chapter.**

 **Anyway, we'll be getting back to the dramatics by Chapter 10, Fumblemore's Magical Brew for All Ills**

 **A couple side notes:**

 **I am accepting OC's for a female character that will play some kind of major role in this story since Daisy Duke mainly plays a very small role as a victim of various evil dudes. PM me your suggestions or leave them in a review!**

 **Another side – note: I've wanted to announce this for a while but I'm proud to say that there will be a sequel to this story. I will be releasing the prologue in about a month and maybe one or two teaser chapters over the next couple months with the final story coming out in 2016 (you know, that year the politicians are always talking about).**

 **Until the next chapter… Cheers!**

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	10. Granny Bacon's Tea and Whoopie Parlor

**SoI Chapter 10: Granny Bacon's Tea and Whoopie Parlor**

The snow began to fall harder as the trio quickly made their way down the dark alleys of Mistral towards Granny's shop. Xephos drew Lysander's traveling cloak over his head to shield himself from the weather and checked his clock, it was half past ten.

"Blast!" Lysander cursed. "The parlor is closed!"

Xephos glanced up at the sign on the windowsill of Granny Bacon's whoopie parlor. It read in big curly letters:

 _Closed_

 _Hours: Six to six on weekdays, seven to eleven on weekends._

"Oh dammit, its Friday isn't it?" he groaned.

"Yeah…" Honeydew sighed, "Who closes on a Friday?"

"Very true hero." Lysander concurred in his usual condescending manner, "It is highly unfortunate. Nevertheless, we must get the second apple if we are to save old Peculier!"

"That's great but how are we going to get in?" Xephos wondered.

"Well we do have one option," Honeydew surmised "but it's slightly extreme." He added somewhat deviously.

"You're going to bust the door in aren't you?" Xephos snorted, "I knew that's what you were thinking! That's always what you're thinking; whenever you get that… look in your eyes."

Honeydew grinned, "What look?"

"That manic look. I've lived with you for years Simon I know what you're like."

"Well, I was going to ask _really_ nicely first."

"Heroes!" Lysander snapped, readjusting his towel to better cover his accident at Jasper's penthouse. "This bickering must cease else! We've spent too long in this weather already! Surely one of you must be getting cold by now?"

"No not really." Xephos demurred.

"Really?" Lysander shook his head in disbelief, "Well, you heroes are made out of sterner stuff than I imagined."

"Living in a cave for a few years helps toughen you up."

"Ah yes… yes of course I suppose cave dwelling would do that…" Lysander replied, teeth chattering as he hugged himself for warmth, "Now, we have talked enough. Could we get on with it please?"

"Get on with what?" Honeydew asked, seeming genuinely confused as to what Lysander was nattering on about.

"Opening that damn door properly!"

"Oh yeah. Alright, fineee… we'll do it the boring way." Honeydew grumbled as he walked over to the door and knocked several times. Then he stepped back and waited for several moments, but there was no response.

"I don't think she's awake Simon." Xephos observed.

"Really? You're a genius Lewis, a bloody genius. Anyway she's gonna be." Honeydew said as he knocked on the door several more times, but louder.

Once again there was no response from inside the parlor and the place was silent save for the quiet pitter patter of falling snowflakes.

"Oh for Mordan's sake." Honeydew muttered as he took several steps back from the doorway.

"Hero-" Lysander gave him a warning glance. However, he was too late on the uptake as Honeydew raced towards the door, giving a dwarven battle cry,

"AAAAAAAAAAHHH!" he rammed into the door and with a low boom it crashed inwards. Lysander and Xephos stood in silence as they watched a cloud of dust emit from the entrance and a few snow flurries blow inside.

"Oh gods Simon…" Xephos sighed "I guess that works."

"Naboth's beard! Is this how he usually acts hero?" Lysander asked as he glanced around the surrounding buildings, checking to see if anyone had been awakened by their noisy entrance. Thankfully, no one seemed to have been disturbed by it as was evident by the lack of yelling or howling dogs in the vicinity.

"Um…" Xephos started before he was interrupted by a loud shriek and several twangs of an arrow followed by another curse in dwarfish,

"Hey! Getoff me you crazy b - , owwww! Stop it! I am NOT trying to rob anything – WE NEED TO SEE GRANNY! GRANNY BACON – I'M A FRIEND – aaah stop shooting at me you crazed – AAAAH GODS!"

"Simon!" Xephos asked as he hurried to the door, by the sound of it his friend was in trouble.

"Lewis! Oi – I told you I'M NOT AN INTRUDER –"

Xephos had barely reached the door before he jumped back as an arrow whizzed by his face.

"Ah!" he yelped before peeking back inside to see a young brown haired woman dressed in brown hiking boots, and a dark green jerkin nock an arrow at his head. Nearby Honeydew was splayed on the floor and held a wooden plank that had several arrows embedded in its surface, as a makeshift shield.

"Hey uh – could you please hold off -?"

However, he was unable to finish his sentence before another arrow sailed by his position near the broken door.

"Enough!" Lysander hollered, "I am Skylord Lysander and I demand that you cease your attack at once!"

There was a brief rusting before Xephos heard the sound of an arrow returning to its quiver. He peeked inside to see that their assailant had laid down her bow, much to his relief, and instead fixed them with an icy glare.

"Skylord? I thought Skylords were supposed to protect from robbers, not aid them!" she said angrily. She had a sharp and commanding, almost a motherly voice. Xephos winced to hear it.

"I told you – we're not robbers – for Notches sake Lewis help me up…" Honeydew groaned.

"Um?" Xephos peeked inside at the woman, "Can I – er help him up?" he said gesturing to the prostate form of Honeydew.

"Yes go ahead." She replied irritably. Xephos nodded and quickly – for fear that he might get shot at again - pulled Honeydew off the floor.

"Oooh thanks. You're a saint Lewis, a bloody saint." Honeydew said as he brushed himself off and faced the woman. "Sorry 'bout the door."

"As you should be! Who are you? What are you doing here? Why do you need to see Granny?"

"Um…"

"We're -"

"It's a bit complicated -"

"It really is actually -"

To the great relief of the two heroes Lysander broke in, "They are Xephos and Honeydew, two heroes of this land. I am their guide. We have come to procure a golden apple from Granny, one of our companions, Old Peculier, has fallen ill and we need one more apple to make him well."

The woman stared at them in silence for a moment before she chuckled and then burst into laughter,

"Heroes? With a Skylord? Searching for a gold apple? Ha! That's a tall tale if I ever heard one!"

"It's complicated!" Honeydew protested.

"Really?" the woman replied, barely concealing her amusement, "Well if you aren't robbers then you might as well come in."

"You… you're letting us in?"

"Yes Dwarf. But don't think yourself welcome. If I find a single thing missing I will shoot an arrow into your backside before you can say Khaz Mordan."

"Right, right… um sorry about the door then." Honeydew muttered.

"I appreciate your kindness Dwarf and as such if you're so sorry would you be kind enough to fix the door before you leave?"

"What -?" Honeydew started before he was interrupted by a kick from Xephos. "Oh the door? Yeah, we'd be _really_ happy to fix it."

"That is well. You three seem to be so good at breaking down doors I'm sure you'd be able to put it back up in no time." The woman smiled sarcastically and sat down at a table near one of the fireplaces. The fellowship watched as she pulled a flint and steel from her jerkin, struck it twice over a log, lighting the fireplace and filling the room with a dim orange glow.

Honeydew watched apprehensively as she turned around and looked at him, wondering if she was about to shoot him any second. Instead the woman sighed, put down her flint and steel, and beckoned towards him.

"Well? Are you going to stand at the doorstep all day?" she said irritably, "Come in for Notches sake. You said you needed to see Granny about something right?"

"Yep!"

"Yes, we need a golden apple." Lysander said as he stepped inside and bowed to her. "Skylord Lysander, at your service dear lady."

"Yeah, I bet you are. If you don't mind Skylord, would you tell your two minions to get in here before the whole place gets covered in snow?"

Lysander nodded, "Heroes!"

At this Xephos and Honeydew came inside and stood next to Lysander, facing their host at the fireplace. The woman stared at them for several seconds before shaking her head in annoyance,

"Are you just going to stand there? Go on, sit down!" she said. The fellowship complied at once. "No, not you two. The Skylord can sit. Get that door up first!"

"She's a bit unfriendly isn't she?" Xephos murmured as he and Honeydew strode over to the fallen door, slowly heaved it upright and slammed it back in place.

"Yeah…" Honeydew panted, "Some lady. I thought women were supposed to be gentle and kind, not you know, like nasty old grannies or something."

Lewis chuckled at this and glanced over at the woman seated at the fireside table with Lysander, "Be glad she didn't hear that one."

"Hey! Have you two finished over there?" the woman asked irritably, fixing them with a stare so icy to Lysander's most offended looks paled in comparison. _If looks could kill_ , Xephos thought, _that would do it_.

"All done you beautifully bosomed young lady." Honeydew winked. _Oh gods_ , Xephos thought as the woman's glare deepened and she got out of her seat to face the dwarf, _this can't end well can it?_

But to Xephos' complete surprise the woman giggled and shook her head, "You lot… you're just so silly!" she fell back in her chair and laughed, "Well go on, take a seat! My name's Haylee, Haylee Evans. Come on sit down, I won't bite."

"Um…" Xephos stared at her. _What just happened?_

" _Beautifully bosomed young lady_! Oh, that's the dumbest line I've heard all day! And from a pudgy old dwarf at that! Ha!" Haylee wiped several tears away from her eyes, "Oh my… that was so stupid!"

"I'll have you know I'm only a hundred and forty." Honeydew retorted, face beet red.

"Only a hundred and forty? Really?" Haylee giggled, "You could be my great, great, great, great grandfather! Can I call you gramps? Is that okay?"

"My name is Honeydew…" Honeydew growled, "And one hundred and forty is very young for a dwarf! I assure you I'm very good, especially in bed if you know what I mean." He added with a sly wink.

"Women Lewis," Honeydew shook his head as he took his seat by Haylee, "I will _never_ understand them."

Lysander shot him a scandalous look at this, "That was hardly appropriate hero."

"Oh sod off Lysander." Honeydew muttered. Lysander raised an indignant eyebrow at this,

"Did you say something hero?"

"Nope!"

"Are you finished babbling yet?" a now very serious Haylee asked loudly, "Because if all you're going to do is have at each other like a peck of crows then I'd be too happy to kick all of you out."

"No, we're quite finished." Lysander demurred, "About the gold –"

"WE NEED THE GOLD APPLE YOU DAFT BITCH!" Honeydew yelled.

"Hero!"

"Who are you calling a daft bitch?!" Haylee growled, "I'm an expert at Archery!"

"Who cares?"

"Oh for cripes sake…" Xephos groaned.

"Were you talking about me dear?" a kindly voice asked from above. This was followed by a loud thump, as if someone was getting out of bed, and soft footsteps down the staircase above; Xephos sighed they had clearly woke someone up.

"What the –" Lysander murmured, staring up at the ceiling in an attempt to discern where the voice had come from. "What was that?"

"Um," Xephos said before the voice called again,

"I'll have you know I'm not daft! I was just taking a wee little nap!"

"Oh my gods Lewis." Honeydew stared at his friend before he burst out laughing, "That's Granny! Bloody hell it's Granny!"

"Oh… it is isn't it?" Xephos agreed, the voice did sound like Granny's. Plus she said 'dear' and Granny was the only person he had ever heard use that word, at least when not referring to someone's wife.

"Now you've done it!" Haylee yelled angrily, slamming her fist on the table, causing several teacups to fall over, roll off the table, and smash into pieces on the floor. "Dammit!" she cursed loudly, "Granny is going to kill me for this!"

"I wouldn't harm a fly on your pretty little head dear!" Granny replied. The group all whirled around in surprise to see the wizened figure of Granny Bacon, in an enormous pink robe standing at the foot of the stairwell, looking a bit too pleased to see them there. Wow, she got down here a bit quickly didn't she? Xephos wondered as Granny paced towards them offering a devious smile to Honeydew. To Xephos' embarrassment, Honeydew returned it in kind and licked his lips rudely causing Granny to giggle.

"Granny…"

"Haylee dear, it's perfectly alright,"

"But Granny but don't you know who –"

"Yes, I know who they are!" Granny beamed, "These are the boys who were kind enough to visit me earlier in the day for a little business. Except _you_ Lysander. I haven't seen you around here for a very long time you naughty boy!"

Lysander blushed a deep red at this, "I'm sorry Ms. Bacon. Forgive me."

"You are forgiven! Now Haylee dear, would you be kind enough to fix our guests a little tea?" Granny said, "I would do it myself but my, I am such an old woman!" she added with a girlish laugh.

"Of course." Haylee muttered, scowling at Honeydew as she strode over to the bar countertop, fetched the tea kettle and began filling it under the tap at once.

"We apologize for the disturbance Ms. Bacon." Lysander said cordially. Granny glanced at him tiredly and waved him off,

"Don't fret over me Lysander. I am but an old maid…"

"A very sexy old maid at that!" Honeydew growled.

Granny giggled at this "Oh I'm all a dither - !" but before she could finish her flirtations there was a loud crash from the bar followed by a chorus of swearing. "Dear me…!" Granny exclaimed, glancing over at the countertop, where a highly animated Haylee was holding the remains of the shattered tea kettle in her left hand. She yelled in anger once more before noticing the group staring at her.

"Sorry," she said, "I just got a bit distracted that's all…"

"That's okay Haylee. Just make sure to clean it up like a good girl and use the other kettle!" Granny said, as he returned her attentions back to the heroes, "Now, what can I do for you dears?"

 **A/N: It feels so good to finally get another chapter out** **I hope you all enjoyed it!**

10


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